1. 穷游是目前世界上一种很时尚的旅游方式。穷游族 通常上网查好攻略，对旅行中的吃、住、行精打细算， 这让很多经济不宽裕的人们也能享受旅游的乐趣，故 此穷游受到越来越多年轻人的喜爱。请针对 “ 穷游 ” 这 一现象，写一篇 120 字左右的作文。内容应包括： 1. 描述这一社会现象； 2. 分析穷游的优缺点（自由安排旅程；节省开支 … ； 食宿条件艰苦；安全 … ）； 3. 阐述你的看法。 参考词汇：穷游 travel on a budget ；穷游族 budget travelers

2. 段落分布： 第一部分：现象描述 第二部分：穷游的优缺点 可以分段， 也可以合为一段 第三部分：你的看法

3. 存在问题： 1. 段落分布不均匀；层次不清晰 2. 现象描述过多、过细 3. 你的看法应该是针对穷游，而不是对旅游的看法 4. 基础错误过多 5. 卷面涂改、字迹潦草、字小难辨认等

4. 第一部分：现象 + 描述 ★ Nowadays, traveling on a budget is gradually gaining popularity, which never fails to attract more people. ★ There exists a common phenomenon that people tend to travel with a tight budget. ★ It seems that traveling on a budget is becoming more and more popular among young people who would like to enjoy an exciting journey. ★ Traveling on a budget is becoming a trend in recent years. ★ As one of the most popular ways to travel, traveling on a budget is appealing to an increasing number of young people. ★ Traveling on a budget, which is regarded as one of the extremely fashionable means of traveling, is well received by an increasing number of young people.

5. 第一部分：现象 + 描述 ★ There is a growing tendency that traveling on a budget is popular with the young for the simple reason that travelers can enjoy the entertainment with affordable budgets. ★ With more and more significance attached to freedom and saving money, recent years have seen a growing tendency that people travel on a budget, which means searching for abundant information and making tight budgets on everything to cut down the cost of traveling. ★ Travelling on a budget is enjoying an increasing popularity among enthusiastic travelers worldwide. With easier access to internet, young travelers tend to make economical plans and good preparations before travel, which enables more travel-lovers, especially poor ones, to enjoy traveling.

6. 第二部分：穷游的优缺点 ★ It can provide them with a good chance to arrange their travel plans freely. ★ In this way, they will have a unique travel which is tailored to their own needs. ★ enjoy the journey to the fullest. ★ It can enrich your life and broaden your horizons. ★ Not only do tours require little budget, but also they give travelers full freedom to arrange and enjoy the trips they long for. ★ It is not only a good way of saving money, but also brings joy to those who are not well-off. ★ Apparently, traveling on a budget has a lot of advantages, the most important of which is that you can save money but still have fun with traveling.

7. 第二部分：穷游的优缺点 ★ Traveling on a budget requires the competence of keeping track of useful information on the Internet. Besides, budget travelers need to use their creative thinking. Confronted with new challenges, they are able to change their schedule with much freedom, which contributes to their low budget. ★ To save money, the accommodation may not be satisfying and supplies may have low quality. ★ Security is also a big concern, especially allowing for the fact that crimes targeted at travelers keeps increasing. ★ Travelers try their best to reduce costs, sacrificing the comfortable conditions, which results in safety problems and the lack of some legal protection.

8. 第三部分：你的看法 ★ From my perspective, traveling on a budget reflects on our awareness of positive attitudes to our life. ★ Traveling is supposed to be an escape from daily routines, while budget traveling seems to bring us back into reality. ★ Traveling on a budget definitely can teach us how to use money properly. As long as we can guarantee our safety, it should be a precious experience to try it. ★ Only by traveling on a budget can we experience the true happiness of a trip and fully appreciate our nature when exposed to the fascinating world. ★ Only by designing the trips on our own can we fully taste the joy of traveling.

9. 第三部分：你的看法 ★ As far as I am concerned, travelling on a budget brings our potential to the full while a tradition journey ensures our safety. However, no matter which way people choose to travel around, it is how much fun they get from it that matters. ★ From my perspective, traveling on a budget does no harm as long as you can bear the poor service and take good care of yourself. After all, it satisfies the human nature to explore the world and dawn on us how colorful life could be.