1. Title | 1Revised 2007Workshop - Opinion| 1 Workshop Activity Everyone’s Got An Opinion 2010

2. Title | 2Revised 2007Workshop - Opinion| 2 Objectives  To explore differences of opinion which can spark arguments  To discuss the importance of negotiating differences of opinion  To recognize when to seek help  To review and identify useful resources that are available to help

3. Title | 3Revised 2007Workshop - Opinion| 3 Resolving arguments over matters of opinion can be difficult – how do you decide how to proceed? Who is “right”? Who is “wrong”? Is there a right or wrong to the situation? Right or Wrong???

4. Title | 4Revised 2007Workshop - Opinion| 4 Questions to Answer Do we have to agree on this? Why? Can we agree to disagree? If not, on what must we agree? How strongly do we each feel about our positions? Who is most affected? Can we make a deal of some kind? What are our individual values that influence each of our opinions?

5. Title | 5Revised 2007Workshop - Opinion| 5 Everyone’s Got An Opinion Remember…there are no right or wrong answers.

6. Title | 6Revised 2007Workshop - Opinion| 6 Negotiating Differences in Opinion  Pick a topic from your Questionnaire on which you and your partner disagree  Try to negotiate the difference of opinion  Get feedback from your team on how you negotiate conflict  Think about these questions:  Was navigating this task easy? Difficult? Why?  What negotiating skills did you use?  Is this a skill that you already use when communicating with other members of your Family, friends etc? If not, why not?  What are the benefits of negotiating?

7. Title | 7Revised 2007Workshop - Opinion| 7 Developing Negotiation Skills Set a strategy/task(s) for yourself to help you become a better negotiator - Let the team help you think about these issues:  Do you need to agree on this?  Will a difference in opinion start an argument?  Remember that a difference in opinion does not mean that you need to convince your partner to agree with you. It is okay to have differences in opinion.  Look for points on which you can agree, rather than just focusing on the things you disagree on.  Try to see the other person’s point of view, instead of just trying to convince him or her that you are right.

8. Title | 8Revised 2007Workshop - Opinion| 8 Feedback and Discussion  What difficulties did you experience in negotiating matters of opinion?  What are the benefits of negotiating?

9. Title | 9Revised 2007Workshop - Opinion| 9 Helpful Tips  Listen and let the person know you understood  Have perspective – hear the person’s views  Monitor non verbal messages  Check-in regularly and focus on the issue at hand  Clarify your thoughts and feelings  Restate the other person’s thoughts and feelings  Avoid placing blame, and “put into words” messages being conveyed  Brainstorm possible solutions with consensus or compromise  Respect the opinion and position of all Family members  Specify your desires and plans to make changes  End conversations with a hopeful statement

10. Title | 10Revised 2007Workshop - Opinion| 10 Barriers to Family Communication  Tunnel vision – seeing only your point of view  Stuffing feelings – not telling your thoughts or feelings  Defensiveness – blaming your partner, or counter- complaining  Intolerance – unwilling to relinquish your position  Mindreading – knowing “on a higher plane” what you think the other person’s thought and feelings are  Anger – shouting or being belligerent, and not being able to diffuse

11. Title | 11Revised 2007Workshop - Opinion| 11 Questions?

12. Title | 12Revised 2007Workshop - Opinion| 12 Issues of Particular Concern  Physical Trauma and Disabilities  Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI)  Combat Related Stress Response and PTSD  Depression  Suicidal Thoughts  Alcohol and Substance Abuse  Domestic Abuse  Child Abuse

13. Title | 13Revised 2007Workshop - Opinion| 13 Where and How to Get Support  Military OneSource  Army OneSource  Comprehensive Soldier Fitness (CSF)  Army Community Service (ACS)  Army National Guard Family Program  Army Reserve Family Programs  Comprehensive Soldier Fitness  Family Readiness Group  Chaplain  Military Life Consultants  Behavioral Health: Social Work Service, Psychiatry, Psychology  Red Cross and other Community Service Agencies  Department of Veteran Affairs

14. Title | 14Revised 2007Workshop - Opinion| 14 Closing Remarks

15. Title | 15Revised 2007Workshop - Opinion| 15 Additional Slides (keep handy as a reference)

16. Title | 16Revised 2007Workshop - Opinion| 16 Role Play

17. Title | 17Revised 2007Workshop - Opinion| 17 Common Homefront Experiences That May Make Conversations Difficult  Combat experience may make it difficult for the Soldier to talk openly about feelings  Soldier may discount feelings and experiences by comparing them to combat  Soldiers and Families may have a habit of sharing only positive news  May be used to sharing with “battle buddy” - whether Soldier or Spouse/Family member

18. Title | 18Revised 2007Workshop - Opinion| 18 Talking It Out – Healthy Communication Listen  Set aside time to talk without distractions  Check in regularly at the first signs of a problem  Create a receptive frame of mind  Listen with eyes and ears Empathize  Clarify the other’s point of view, paying attention to their feelings  Convey a connectedness, having a willingness to compromise

19. Title | 19Revised 2007Workshop - Opinion| 19 Talking It Out – Healthy Communication Listen Empathize Recognize the impact of stress on communication