1. INTIMACY AND INTERDEPENDENCE
Part One: The Great Myth
“I’ll Be Intimate With You,
If You Give Me
What I Want And Need”
Rev. Daniel Gowan, LCDC, LPC-S
Dina Hijazi, PhD, CSAT, LSSP

2. Our Hunger for Connection

3. Definitions:
Intimacy : the state of being familiar, a state marked by closeness or warmth, a state marked by emotional closeness, a state of being very personal or private
Pia Mellody’s definition: in-te-me-se
in- to-me-(you)-se

4. Synonyms:
Faithfulness, affinity, love, fellowship, closeness, chumminess

5. Antonyms:
Aloofness, Coldness, Distance,
Withdrawn, Indifferent

6. Types of Intimacy: 1. Intellectual 2. Physical 3. Emotional
4. Behavioral
5. Social

7. Boundaries Containment Boundary Protection Boundary Loving others
Loving Self
Communication Rule # 1 (the only rule)
Whenever someone is speaking,
they are telling you about themselves

8. Hula Hoop Review

9. Wants and Needs: What is the difference between wants and needs?
Who is responsible for my wants,
who for my needs?
The Covert or Implicit Contract:
What I want and need…… is for you to
become what I want and need!

10. The Practice of Intimacy
Talking to be known without attachment to outcome
Listening with curiosity without
defensiveness
When I saw (or) heard you………I made
up….....And about that I feel………

11. VALUABLE
Self Esteem
Do you feel
Less Than or Better Than?

12. VULNERABLE
Boundaries
Are you
Too Vulnerable or
Invulnerable?

13. IMPERFECT
Reality
Are you
Rebellious or Perfect?

14. DEPENDENT
Wants and Needs
Are you
Too Dependent or
Anti-dependent?

15. SPONTANEOUS
Are you Out of Control or do you Control Others?

16. Thank you for your attention!
Rev. Daniel Gowan, LCDC, LPC-S
(972)
Dr. Dina Hijazi, PhD, LP, CSAT, LSSP
(214)