1. How to develop health relationships
Healthy or Unhealthy
How to develop health relationships

2. Components of healthy relationships:
Communication
Trust
Respect
Love
What does it look like?

3. Conflict Resolution Skills How to Deal with Disagreements
COMMUNICATION
Conflict Resolution Skills
How to Deal with Disagreements
1. Define the problem clearly from both points of view.
2. State what you can agree on.
3. Brainstorm together over all of the possible alternatives to the problem.
4. State what changes each of you is personally willing to make to arrive at a solution.
5. Summarize the best solution you have considered.

4. Trust is an extremely important aspect to a healthy relationship!
Trusting
Lets you hang out with your friends
Understands when you have to change plans
Lets you wear what you want
Not Trusting
Calls you every second of the day and demands information
Won’t let you change plans or makes you feel guilty
Get’s jealous when other people are talking to you
Trust is an extremely important aspect to a healthy relationship!

6. RESPECT
On a practical level respect includes taking someone's feelings, needs, thoughts, ideas, wishes and preferences into consideration.
It means taking all of these seriously and giving them worth and value. In fact, giving someone respect seems similar to valuing them and their thoughts, feelings, etc.
It also includes acknowledging them, listening to them, being truthful with them, and accepting their individuality and idiosyncrasies.

8. Unhealthy Relationships

9. Unhealthy relationships
Relationships that are harmful
An unhealthy relationship can be damaging to the self-esteem. If a relationship continues to be unhealthy then it needs to END
Signs that a relationship is destructive:
physical or emotional cruelty, using you for their gains, pressuring you to go against your values, frequent arguments, etc.

10. What is Dating Violence?
Dating violence is defined as the physical, sexual, psychological or emotional violence within a dating relationship.
Gain and maintain power and control
Dating Violence is not an argument once in a while… It is a continual pattern of abusive and or violent behavior

11. Examples of Abuse in Dating Relationships Include:
Emotional Abuse:
Making a Partner Feel Insecure: name calling; put downs; criticisms; humiliating; attacking the person's capabilities; saying "Nobody wants you.”
Mind Games: making to feel guilty; making to feel crazy; blaming the partner for things that go wrong; having the partner wait by the phone.
Isolating the Dating Partner from friends & family: pressuring the partner to give up activities, sports, work, and hobbies; keeping tabs on the dating partner when they go out by paging, calling or dropping by.
Using Intimidation: Breaking objects; punching walls; threatening looks; threatening to hurt the partner; threatening the partner's family, friends or pet; destroying treasured belongings.
Acting Extremely Jealous: not allowing the dating partner to talk to anyone of the opposite sex; accusing the partner of flirting or having sexual intercourse with others

12. Examples of Abuse in Dating Relationships Include:
Physical Abuse:
Shoving or pushing; squeezing a shoulder; restraining by holding a wrist or holding a hand tightly; shaking, pulling hair; slapping, punching; kicking; choking; pushing out of a car.
Sexual Abuse:
Any unwanted sexual contact, comments or gesturing within a relationship; manipulating a partner into doing something sexual that makes them feel uncomfortable.

13. Warning Signs
Signs that a dating situation or relationship could be dangerous
Checking your cell phone/social media without your permission
Constant put downs
Extreme jealousy or insecurity
Explosive temper
Isolating you away from friends and family
Mood swings
Physically hurting you
Possessiveness
Telling you what to do, what you should or shouldn’t wear
Intimidating
Forcing/coercing you to do things you’re not comfortable with

16. Jennifer Ann Crecente
A high school honors student that was murdered by an ex-boyfriend on February 15, 2006.

17. Sophie Elliot
Stabbed to death by a former boyfriend on January 9, 2008
Sophie died after being stabbed or cut 216 times
Her mother described the "on-again, off-again" relationship between her daughter and her boyfriend.
Conversations she had with her daughter in which Sophie told her of put-downs from him, a series of arguments, an assault that happened in his flat a week before her death and how he had told her she had ruined his chances of becoming a lecturer at the university. .

18. DON’T LET THIS HAPPEN TO YOU!
What can you do to protect yourself?
Go to a safe place - remove yourself from the situation
Move in groups
Get help - call police, friend, family
Change routines – class schedule or school
If in a dangerous situation call 911
Think seriously about your situation - you may think you can handle it … but think twice to be sure.
Get help – YWCA protection order

19. Changing and Ending Relationships
Growing and experiencing new things change our relationships
No matter how a relationship ends you will go through a grieving process, which is normal.
Allow time
Don’t have to suffer to show how much you cared
Accept that it is over
Begin to do things that make you happy

20. How to Help a Friend Who is Being Abused
Listen to what your friend has to say. Don't be Judgmental! Don't make them feel ashamed. They probably feel bad enough already.
Tell your friend that you are available when they need to talk .
Make it clear that you care, and that you are worried.
Talk in private and don't gossip about what your friend has confided.
Let the person know why you are concerned.
Be specific. Refer to certain incidents you have witnessed and not to the relationship in general.
Talk about what you saw and how it made you feel .
Tell them the ways you believe the specific behavior is having an impact on them - "When she put you down you seemed embarrassed and then you made excuses for what she did." Or "When he was yelling you seemed frightened.”

21. Personal Rights in a Relationship
THE RIGHT to refuse requests without having to feel guilty or selfish.
THE RIGHT to express my feelings, including anger, as long as I don't violate the rights of others.
THE RIGHT to be competitive and to achieve.
THE RIGHT to have my needs be as important as the needs of other people.
THE RIGHT to decide which activities will fulfill my needs.
THE RIGHT to make mistakes and be responsible for them.
THE RIGHT to have my opinions given the same respect and consideration as others'.
THE RIGHT to change my mind.
THE RIGHT to be independent.
THE RIGHT to be treated respectfully.
THE RIGHT to be cooperative and giving and not be taken advantage of.
THE RIGHT to be safe.

22. What You Need to Remember
Any kind of abuse it NOT your fault.
You don’t deserve being treated this way.
You should always be safe.
NO means NO