1. Duck Duck Goose Verbatim Theatre Tour 2016 Conflict in Friendships
Resource Pack 3
Conflict in Friendships
Anti-Bullying Works in partnership with Chichester Festival Theatre are proud to present the Verbatim Theatre Tour of Duck Duck Goose.
The play has been written using the real words of real people who talked to us about bullying. This is one of four Extension Activity Packs which can be used as a stand alone resource in a lesson or assembly, or can also be used in conjunction with video ‘shorts’ from the tour which will be available online.
This year’s Anti-Bullying week theme is ‘Power For Good’ and it is all about understanding ways in which young people are powerful. Children and young people all have the power to speak out about bullying and take individual or collective action to help create the best world possible.
The idea of children and young people being ‘Powered Up to Do Good’ will be explored alongside the themes arising from the play.
A big part of this is to encourage ‘talking schools’ where all young people are given a safe space to discuss bullying and are supported to report all forms of bullying behaviour.
Note: To avoid confusion you may wish to review your school’s existing definition of bullying behaviour, as this may differ from the one used by the Anti-Bullying Alliance and Department for Education within this presentation.

2. Anti-Bullying Week 2016
Children and Young People are powerful. Take action to create the best world possible.
#powerforgood
This year the Anti-Bullying Alliance are asking young people to ‘Power Up Against Bullying’ and part of this is recognising that each person has their own power to decide how to behave.
Ask the learners how will you use your Power (or your Voice) – What do they want to say about bullying and what ideas do they have about making the world around them a better and safer place?
Explain what it means to take individual and collective action to STOP bullying and create the best world possible. Give an example: make a short film in school or start a peer mentor scheme.
[Teachers and school staff are encouraged to promote collective action to prevent bullying and create a SAFE environment where children can thrive].

3. Learning outcomes
Learners understand why conflict can happen in relationships
Learners understand different ways of managing conflict in bullying situations

4. Conflict in Friendships
Let’s talk about
Conflict in Friendships

5. How would you react?
We haven’t invented these characters…
Listen to these stories of real people using their own words.
The Duck Duck Goose tour is about using real people’s stories – in their own words.
Start thinking about what attitudes and beliefs might be lurking behind the words that people say.
Let’s look at 3 short extracts from the play.
We’ll read it out and then give you a chance to think about why this person is being picked on because they are different and we’ll then look at the consequences of the behaviour.
Note: We will also be making most scenes available as short video clips on YouTube.
When you read these you can refer to the key words that define bullying: deliberate, hurtful, repeated and power. 5

6. Scene 3
“I’ve seen erm people be really mean to one of my friends, because…she has a horse…There’s parts of me that believe her and part of me that don’t because she tells all her teachers that she has a horse but some of the things that she says about her horse [like] trying to jump her horse like 5 foot and she wouldn’t really jump a horse 5 foot…”.
[Facilitators information - this is taken from Scene 3 – a girl talking about her friend getting picked on because she has a horse]
Why is this young person being targeted?
What are the consequences for the her and her friend?
Does it make it more difficult if she doesn’t know if she believes her friend?
Who do you think has the power in this situation?
What would you do if you saw this happening – or if it happened to you?

7. Scene 9
“I worked with a young girl… and she was part of this group and the queen bee at some point decided that they no longer wanted her in there, and I had to go through with her you know, the difficulties that she had, suddenly being excluded from a friendship group that she'd had since joining secondary school…”
[Facilitators information – this is taken from Scene 8 – describing a situation where a friendship group of girls excluded one of their group ]
Why is this young person being targeted?
What are the consequences for the young person? What are the consequences for the friendship group?
Do you think the Queen Bee was feeling threatened? How do the other girls react?
see Queen Bee – roles sheet for further discussion and group work:
(Hyperlink on Further Links and Reading page)
What would you do if you saw this happening – or if it happened to you?
Who has the power in this situation? What can be done to help?

8. Scene 10
“…one young person that I was working with fell into a trap of… sending some revealing photographs of herself to a so-called boyfriend at the time, thinking that it was only for him…he then passed those on to his friends…[her friendship group] then turned on her and blamed her for it and started calling her things…”
[Facilitators information – this is taken from Scene 2 – a caseworker describes how a girl became a victim of ‘sexting’ and then became isolated from her friends]
This young woman has been excluded from her friendship groups and her photograph has been shared around on social media - what are the consequences for the young person?
What are the consequences for the ex-boyfriend?
Why didn’t her friends step into help? (Think about the Queen Bee story)
What would you do if you saw this happening – or if it happened to you?
Who has the has power in this situation?

9. Why me?
Bullying behaviour can be used to isolate, alienate and reject people from friendship groups
Bullying behaviours that lead to people feeling isolated and alone without any friends are very powerful.
Girl friendship groups can often be particularly cruel and it can difficult to escape from the situation if the individual is also being targeted over social media.

10. Queen Bee – The Hive! Queen Bee Pleaser The Sidekick Torn The Floater
The Banker
Wannabe
Pleaser
Messenger
Torn
Bystander
Friendships among girls or ‘cliques’ can be difficult to understand.
Problems and conflict are usually a result of power and control.
Who has the most power, how can you keep the power, and how can you stop others from having power in the group?
For further discussion and reading:
(Hyperlink on the Further Links and Resources page)

11. Did you really say that? Text messages can be easily misunderstood!
It can be useful to look at a way of understanding the impact of our communication. To get our message across we need to match the words we say with how we say them and also the non-verbal messages coming from our body language.
Social media, instant messages and text messages often rely only on words and emoticons – in fact a lot of words get replaced by graphics and phrases that get abbreviated like LOL.
Text messages can easily be misunderstood. It’s amazing how upsetting it can be to receive a text and think it means one thing when the person sending the message meant to say something totally different.
Even though texting and instant messaging are fast ways to communicate, they often leads to problems and can end up with lots of apologies and explanations afterwards.
When you post something online, or send a text always think before you send.
Text messages can be easily misunderstood!

12. Sexting – the facts. Defined as “Youth Produced Sexual Imagery”
Includes videos and photos including selfies
Making, possession of and sharing Images is Illegal
Government guidance providing useful definitions and teaching strategies
(Hyperlink on Further Links and Resources page)
It is wrong to be put under pressure to take a photo of yourself or someone else
Know your rights and understand what is illegal
Any use of social media to share or distribute ‘Youth Produced Sexual Imagery’ needs to be reported to the police and/or CEOP

13. How can you get help and stay safe?
Resolving Conflict
How can you get help and stay safe?
At the start of Duck Duck Goose, one of the characters talks about the difficulty of getting help if a teacher doesn’t see your situation as bullying.
If this happens, then do your best to find another adult to talk to – a parent / carer / youth worker / teaching assistant / Doctor…
If you are being bullied through social media then try to get screen shots and print them out, don’t delete text messages.
Talk to people you can trust and don’t keep it to yourself.
Try to remember that things will improve and get better for you.
How can you be a good friend?

14. Power Up It starts with Me Against Bullying Be part of the solution
Let’s remind ourselves of this year’s Anti-Bullying Week theme – “Power for Good”
We all have a choice about how we behave and a choice about how we react to a bullying situation we see happening around us.
Discuss – What can you do to Power Up Against Bullying?
Empathy – understand how others might be feeling
Perception that friends expect them to help
Some experience of helping someone in trouble in the past
Age – primary age are more likely to help than secondary pupils
Gender – girls more likely to intervene than boys
Remember: One kind word can change someone’s entire day

15. ? ? What now? What now? Walk away Talk to a teacher
Try not to say anything back
Try not to say anything back ?
Stand Up for your friends
Don’t keep it to yourself
Don’t keep it to yourself
Tell an adult that you trust
Speak to your parent / carer
Speak to your parent / carer
What other ideas or suggestions can you think of?
Option – Watch or read Scene 14
This is the advice from the young people who told their stories through Duck Duck Goose.
Remember: You have the power to change the situation. This might be a situation you are in, or a situation that you see one of your friends in.
Doing nothing is not an option! ?
Ignore as best you can

16. Collective Response Challenge all forms of bullying.
Know the facts about illegal sharing of images.
Understand conflict is usually a result of people wanting to keep ‘Power’ and dominate others.
Work together to help create the best world possible!
#powerforgood

17. Further Links and Reading
Sexting in Schools and Colleges
Queen Bee – Relational Conflict amongst girls
Childnet – Internet Safety Tips
Staying safe online
Child Safety Online – Social Media Guidance
Books on E-Safety and Cyberbullying by Adrienne Katz
Follow these links for further information and ideas about how to plan sessions and activities around Bullying.

18.
@AB_Works