1. HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS—
OUR BODIES
FRIENDS
DATING
SEXUALITY/SEX
INTIMACY

2. Dr. Marilyn K Volker, Sexologist Miami, FL besafemv@gmail.com
American Board Of Sexology
American Academy of Clinical Sexology

5. BE SAFE
Physically
Sexually
EMOTIONALLY

7. SAFETY DECISIONS
WHO????
WHAT????
WHERE????
WHEN???
WHY???
HOW???

8. SAFETY DECISIONS WHAT ARE THE POSITIVES? WHAT ARE THE NEGATIVES?
WHAT IS MY GOAL?
WHAT ARE MY VALUES?—I’ll DO THIS—
I WON’T DO THIS--

9. SAFETY COMMUNICATION I’LL DO THIS…..BUT NOT THAT… YES….or NO….or
I HAVE TO THINK ABOUT IT
MAYBE LATER
NOT NOW
I HAVE TO TALK TO ______ FIRST

10. 8 TYPES OF INTIMACY Affection Spiritual Physical (not sex) Social
Aesthetic
(sharing something beautiful)
Emotional
(talk about feelings)
Sexual
(outercourse / intercourse)
Intellectual
(talk about facts)

11. Just Say “KNOW” Use your head Use your heart Always be safe
nmnh/buginfo/butterfly.htm

12. 8 TYPES OF INTIMACY Affection Spiritual Physical (not sex) Social
Aesthetic
(sharing something beautiful)
Emotional
(talk about feelings)
Sexual
(outercourse / intercourse)
Intellectual
(talk about facts)

13. Psycho-sexual skill development and problematic Sexual Behaviors
Courtship
Touching
Staring
Obsessing- blind infatuations
Wishful thinking
Understanding wants and needs
Love and Friendship
Sexual emotions and adolescence
Communication and Sexuality
Larry Obsessing
Blind infatuation and Stalking – definitions
Expectations and wishful thinking
Understanding wants and needs
Obsessing

14. AFFECTIONAL INTIMACY WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE TYPE OF AFFECTION? HUGS
NOTES/ /TEXT/TWEET
KISSES
FIST BUMP
HIGH FIVE
NICE WORDS

18. THIS IS ME/I RESPECT ME I AM: I LIKE TO DO THIS:
I DON’T LIKE TO DO THIS:
I WISH I COULD:
I WOULD LIKE TO:
I’M LEARNING ABOUT:
MY PETS/HOBBIES:
MY FAMILY:
MY FRIENDS:

19. 8 TYPES OF INTIMACY Affection Spiritual Physical (not sex) Social
Aesthetic
(sharing something beautiful)
Emotional
(talk about feelings)
Sexual
(outercourse / intercourse)
Intellectual
(talk about facts)

20. Emotional Intimacy Sharing YOUR Feelings Listening to OTHER’S
Be Respectful
Thank You for Listening

21. COMMUNICATE… I FEEL….. I’D LIKE TO… I DON’T WANT TO… I’LL DO THIS…
I WON’T DO THIS…
HOW DO YOU FEEL?

22. Someone who pressures you is NOT thinking about your feelings
Someone who pressures you is NOT thinking about your feelings! Tell him or her how you feel.

23. 8 TYPES OF INTIMACY Affection Spiritual Physical (not sex) Social
Aesthetic
(sharing something beautiful)
Emotional
(talk about feelings)
Sexual
(outercourse / intercourse)
Intellectual
(talk about facts)

24. Physical intimacy Walks, running, jogging Tournaments
Marathons, skiing, working out
Skating
Surfing
Sailing

26. 8 TYPES OF INTIMACY Affection Spiritual Physical (not sex) Social
Aesthetic
(sharing something beautiful)
Emotional
(talk about feelings)
Sexual
(outercourse / intercourse)
Intellectual
(talk about facts)

27. Aesthetic Intimacy....sharing beauty
MUSIC…
MOVIES…
BEACHES…
STARS!....
FLOWERS….
FOOD….
ANIMALS

28. 8 TYPES OF INTIMACY Affection Spiritual Physical (not sex) Social
Aesthetic
(sharing something beautiful)
Emotional
(talk about feelings)
Sexual
(outercourse / intercourse)
Intellectual
(talk about facts)

29. WHAT DO YOU LIKE TO TALK ABOUT????
Intellectual Stimulation
WHAT DO YOU LIKE TO TALK ABOUT????
MOVIES, SPORTS, THE WORLD, VIDEO GAMES, FOOD, CLOTHES, VACATIONS, SCHOOL….???

31. 8 TYPES OF INTIMACY Affection Spiritual Physical (not sex) Social
Aesthetic
(sharing something beautiful)
Emotional
(talk about feelings)
Sexual
(outercourse / intercourse)
Intellectual
(talk about facts)

32. Spiritual/Values
Worship
Self development
Cultural
politics

35. 8 TYPES OF INTIMACY Affection Spiritual Physical (not sex) Social
Aesthetic
(sharing something beautiful)
Emotional
(talk about feelings)
Sexual
(outercourse / intercourse)
Intellectual
(talk about facts)

40. External Female Genitals

42. 100% SAFE NO SEX – ABSTINENCE OR TOUCHING YOUR OWN BODY – MASTURBATION

46. SEX ON OUTSIDE OF THE BODY
– OUTERCOURSE –

49. Condoms

51. 8 TYPES OF INTIMACY Affection Spiritual Physical (not sex) Social
Aesthetic
(sharing something beautiful)
Emotional
(talk about feelings)
Sexual
(outercourse / intercourse)
Intellectual
(talk about facts)

52. Just Say “KNOW” Use your head Use your heart Always be safe
nmnh/buginfo/butterfly.htm

53. BE SAFE
Physically
Emotionally
Sexually

54. LIFE SITUATIONS YOU ARE IN YOUR CLASS—
A FRIEND IN YOUR CLASS ASKS TO BORROW
LUNCH MONEY EVERY DAY…
HOW DO YOU FEEL???
WHAT ARE THE PRO’S/CON’S?
WHAT IS YOUR GOAL?
WHAT ARE SOME POSSIBLE DECISIONS?
I’LL DO THIS ____ BUT NOT THIS ___

55. LIFE SITUATION
YOU ARE INVITED TO A PARTY BY YOUR FRIENDS…THIS PARTY IS AT A HOME YOU HAVE NEVER BEEN TO…
HOW DO YOU FEEL??
WHAT ARE THE PRO’S/CON’S?
WHAT IS YOUR GOAL?
WHAT ARE SOME POSSIBLE DECISIONS?
I’LL DO THIS____/BUT NOT THIS ____

56. LIFE SITUATION YOU ARE AT A PARTY AND HAVING FUN
YOU ARE DANCING WITH PEOPLE & SOMONE
OFFERS YOU A DRINK IN A CUP…YOU ARE
THIRSTY…WHAT DO YOU DO?
HOW ARE YOU FEELING?
WHAT ARE THE PRO’S/CON’S?
WHAT ARE SOME POSSIBLE DECISIONS?
WHAT CAN YOU SAY?

57. LIFE DECISIONS
YOU ARE WALKING TO CLASS. YOU MEET SOMEONE WHO YOU LIKE & SEEMS TO LIKE YOU…THIS PERSON WANTS YOUR E=MAIL…
HOW DO YOU FEEL?
WHAT ARE THE PRO’S?/CON’S?
WHAT ARE SOME POSSIBLE DECISIONS?
I’ll DO THIS ____ BUT NOT THIS___

58. LIFE DECISIONS
YOU ARE DATING SOMEONE REALLY NICE. YOU GO TO MOVIES, PARTIES, RESTAURANT. THIS PERSON WANTS TO BE YOUR GIRLFRIEND OR BOYFRIEND. THIS PERSON WANTS TO KISS, HOLD HANDS, & WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU…YOU REALLY LIKE THIS PERSON.
HOW DO YOU FEEL?
WHAT ARE THE PRO’S/CON’S?
WHAT ARE SOME POSSIBLE DECISIONS?
I’LL DO THIS____BUT NOT THIS ____

59. OTHER LIFE DECISIONS--
YOUR LIFE SITUATIONS:
HOW DO YOU FEEL?
WHAT ARE THE PRO’S?/CON’S?
WHAT ARE SOME POSSIBLE DECISIONS?
I’LL DO THIS _____BUT NOT THIS ____