1. Writing Business Messages
Learning Objectives
After studying this chapter, you will be able to:
Explain the importance of adapting your messages to the needs and expectations of your audience.
Define the “you” attitude and its role in successful communication.
Discuss four ways of achieving a tone that is conversational but still businesslike.
Explain the meaning of plain English and its value in business communication.
Briefly describe how to select words that are not only correct but also effective.
Explain how sentence style affects emphasis within a message.
List five ways to develop coherent paragraphs.
Identify the most common software features that help you craft messages more efficiently.
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2. The Three-Step Process
Planning
Completing
Writing
Analyze Situation
Gather Information
Select Medium
Get Organized
Adapt to
the Audience
Compose
the Message
Revise
Produce
Proofread
Distribute
With a solid plan in place, you are ready to choose the words and craft the sentences and paragraphs that will carry your ideas to their intended audience. This chapter discusses the tasks involved in adapting to your audience and composing your message.
Planning business messages. To plan any message, first analyze the situation by defining your purpose and developing a profile of your audience. With that in mind, you can gather information that will meet your audience’s needs. Next, select the right medium (oral, written, or electronic) to deliver your message. With those three factors in place, you’re ready to organize the information by defining your main idea, limiting your scope, selecting an approach, and outlining your content. Planning messages is the focus of Chapter 3.
Writing business messages. Once you’ve planned your message, adapt to your audience with sensitivity, relationship skills, and style. Then you’re ready to compose your message by choosing strong words, creating effective sentences, and developing coherent paragraphs. Writing business messages is discussed in this chapter.
Completing business messages. After writing your first draft, revise your message to make sure it is clear, concise, and correct. Next produce your message, giving it an attractive, professional appearance. Proofread the final product for typos, spelling errors, and other mechanical problems. Finally, distribute your message using the best combination of personal and technological tools. Completing business messages is discussed in Chapter 5.
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3. Adapt to the Audience Sensitivity Relationships Style and Tone
In any communication situation, audiences are more likely to notice, pay attention to, and respond to messages that promise to address their concerns. As noted in the three-step writing process, to adapt your message to your audience, do the following:
Be sensitive to your audience’s needs.
Build a strong relationship with your audience.
Control your style to maintain a professional tone.
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4. Audience Sensitivity Adopt a “You” Attitude Demonstrate
Business Etiquette
Even in simple messages intended merely to share information, it's possible to use all the right words and still not be sensitive to your audience and their needs. You can improve your audience sensitivity by doing the following:
Adopting the "you" attitude
Maintaining good standards of etiquette
Emphasizing the positive
Using bias-free language
Emphasize the
Positive
Use Bias-Free
Language
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5. The “You” Attitude Audience Speaking Writing Wishes Interests Hopes
Approach your messages by adopting a “you” attitude––that is, speaking and writing in terms of the audience’s wishes, interests, hopes, and preferences.
On the simplest level, adopt the “you” attitude by replacing terms that refer to yourself and your company with terms that refer to your audience. In other words, use you and yours instead of I, me, mine, we, us, and ours. Too many business messages have an “I” or “we” attitude. The message tells what the sender wants, and the audience is expected to go along with it.
The “you” attitude isn’t just a matter of using one pronoun rather than another; it’s a matter of genuine empathy. It’s the thought and sincerity that count, not the pronoun. The important thing is your attitude toward audience members and your appreciation of their position.
Wishes
Interests
Hopes
Preferences
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Effective communicators adopt the “you” attitude—speaking and writing in terms of your audience’s wishes, interests, hopes, and preferences.
One way to use the “you” attitude is to replace words such as I, me, mine, we, us,
and ours with words such as you and yours.
Avoid overdoing the “you” attitude; otherwise, you run the risk of creating awkward sentences and sounding overly enthusiastic and artificial.
The “you” attitude is not meant to be manipulative or insincere.
In some situations, especially when trying to avoid sounding overly authoritative
or accusing, it’s best to avoid using you.
The “You” Attitude. These revisions reflect the reader’s viewpoint:
For your convenience, an order form has been supplied in the back of our catalog.
So that you can be served quickly, please bring your credit card to the store with you.
For the next week, you can receive a 25 percent discount on all our 15-inch monitors.
Do you need a bright, capable person to handle the bookkeeping in your office? If so, please consider me for the job. I recently earned a business degree with honors from Mira Costa College and am eager to put my skills to work for you.
Enclosed is the $25 refund you requested.

6. Business Etiquette Respect Courtesy Diplomacy
Good etiquette is not only a way to show respect for your audience; it also helps foster a more successful environment for communication by minimizing negative emotional reactions. Some situations require more diplomacy than others. If you know your audience well, a less formal approach might be more appropriate. However, when you are communicating with people who outrank you or with people outside your organization, an added measure of courtesy is usually needed. Written communication and most forms of electronic media generally require more tact than oral communication.
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Courteous Communication. These phrases have a softer tone:
We understand that your check was mailed last Thursday; however, our offices have not yet received it.
When customers purchase merchandise at our end-of-season sales, all sales are final.
Please sign the last page of the enclosed contract and return it to us.
After receiving your letter telling us about our last shipment to you, we investigated both the shipping and delivery dates.
Thank you for mailing your new will to our offices; so that we may be sure to follow your instructions, please mail them to us as soon as possible.

7. Emphasize the Positive
Avoid Negativity
Stress Benefits
Use Euphemisms
Sensitive communicators understand the difference between delivering negative news and being negative. Never try to hide the negative news, but look for positive points that will foster a good relationship with your audience. In addition, if you are trying to persuade your audience to perform a particular action, point out how doing so will benefit them.
In general, try to state your message without using words that might hurt or offend your audience. Substitute euphemisms (milder synonyms) for terms with unpleasant connotations. That way, you can be honest without being harsh. However, remember that you walk a fine line between softening the blow and hiding the facts, when using euphemisms.
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Emphasizing the Positive. These revisions have a more positive slant:
So that your credit rating can be preserved, please remit your payment within 10 days.
We offer refunds for merchandise that is returned in like-new condition.
We will ship your Baby Cry doll in 10 days.
Please indicate the blouse color you prefer on the enclosed order form and return it to us so that we can mail your order.
The damage to your waterbed was caused by unusual conditions not covered by the guarantee; however, we will be happy to send you a replacement valve for $9.95, plus postage.

8. Use Bias-Free Language
Labels
Disability
Age
Gender
Race or
Ethnicity
Perception
Prejudices
Bias-free language avoids unethical, embarrassing language blunders related to gender, race, ethnicity, age, and disability. Biased language is not simply about “labels.” Instead, language reflects the way people think and believe; therefore, biased language may perpetuate the underlying stereotypes and prejudices that it represents. Moreover, because communication is all about perception, simply being fair and objective is not enough. You must also appear to be fair. As the list below indicates, bias can take many forms:
Age bias. As with gender, race, and ethnic background, mention the age of a person only when it is relevant. When referring to older people, avoid such stereotyped adjectives as spry and frail.
Gender bias. Avoid sexist language by using the same label for everyone (don’t call a woman chairperson and then call a man chairman). Reword sentences to use they or to use no pronoun at all. Vary traditional patterns by sometimes putting women first (women and men, her and his).
Disability bias. Avoid mentioning a disability unless it is pertinent. If you must refer to someone’s disability, avoid terms such as handicapped, crippled, or retarded. Put the person first and the disability second.
Racial and ethnic bias. The central principle is to avoid language suggesting that members of a racial or an ethnic group have stereotypical characteristics. The best solution is to avoid identifying people by race or ethnic origin unless such a label is relevant.
Stereotypes
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9. Audience Relationships
Establish
Your Credibility
Project the
Company’s Image
Focusing on your audience's needs is vital to effective communication, but you also have your own priorities as a communicator. Two key efforts help you address your own needs while building positive relationships with your audience: establishing your credibility and projecting your company's image.
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10. Establish Your Credibility
Honesty
Awareness
Endorsements
Confidence
Objectivity
Credentials
Performance
Sincerity
Your audience's response to every message you send depends heavily on their perception of your credibility, a measure of your believability based on how reliable you are and how much trust you evoke in others. Whether you're working to build credibility with a new audience, to maintain credibility with an existing audience, or even to restore credibility after a mistake, consider emphasizing the following characteristics:
Honesty. Demonstrating honesty and integrity will earn you the respect of your colleagues and the trust of everyone you communicate with, even if they don't always agree with you.
Objectivity. Distance yourself from emotional situations and look at all sides of an issue. Audience members want to believe that you have their interests in mind, not just your own.
Awareness of audience needs. Let your audience know that you understand what's important to them. If you've done a thorough audience analysis, you'll know what your audience cares about in a particular situation.
Credentials, knowledge, and expertise. Every audience wants to be assured that the messages they receive come from people who know what they're talking about. To establish credibility with a new audience, put yourself in their shoes and identify the credentials that would be most important to them.
Endorsements. If your audience doesn't know anything about you, you might be able to get assistance from someone they do know and trust.
Performance. It's easy to say you can do something, but following through can be much harder. That’s why demonstrating impressive communication skills is not enough; people need to know they can count on you to get the job done.
Confidence. Audiences also need to know that you believe in yourself and your message.
Sincerity. When you offer praise, don’t use hyperbole, such as “you are the most fantastic employee I could ever imagine.” Instead, point out specific qualities that warrant praise.
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11. Project Company’s Image
Be a Spokesperson
Follow Guidelines
Observe Colleagues
When you communicate with outsiders, on even the most routine matter, you serve as the spokesperson for your organization. The impression you make can enhance or damage the reputation of the entire company. Thus, your own views and personality must be subordinated, at least to some extent, to the interests and style of your company.
Many companies have specific communication guidelines that show everything from the correct use of the company name to grammatical details. Specifying a desired style of communication is more difficult, however. Observe more experienced colleagues to see how they communicate, and never hesitate to ask for editorial help to make sure you're conveying the appropriate tone.
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Project your company’s image by following these steps:
Subordinate your own views and personality, at least to some extent, to the
interests and style of your company.
Follow your organization’s specific communication guidelines.
Observe more experienced colleagues to see how they communicate, and never
hesitate to ask for editorial help.

12. Control Style and Tone Conversational Plain English Active or Passive
Style is the way you use words to achieve a certain tone, or overall impression. The right choice depends on the nature of your message and your audience.
Most business messages aim for a conversational tone, using plain language.
Plain English is a way of writing and arranging technical materials so that your audience can understand your meaning. Because it’s close to the way people normally speak, plain English is easy to understand.
Your choice of active or passive voice also affects the tone of your message.
The next several slides look at these concepts in more detail.
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13. Conversational Tone Avoid Using Use Carefully Obsolete Language
Preaching or Bragging
Emotion or Intimacy
Humor and Satire
You can achieve a conversational yet business-like tone in your messages by following these guidelines:
Avoid obsolete and pompous language. Business language used to be much more formal than it is today, and some out-of-date phrases still remain. You can avoid using such language if you ask yourself, "Would I say this if I were talking with someone face-to-face?" Similarly, avoid using big words, trite expressions, and overly complicated sentences to impress others. Such pompous language sounds self-important.
Avoid preaching and bragging. Few things are more irritating than people who think that they know everything and that others know nothing.
Be careful with intimacy. Most business messages should avoid intimacy, such as sharing personal details or adopting a causal, unprofessional tone. However, when you do have a close relationship with your audience, such as among the members of a close-knit team, a more intimate tone is sometimes appropriate and even expected.
Be careful with humor. Humor can be an effective tool to inject interest into dry subjects or take the sting out of negative news. However, use it with great care: the humor must be connected to the point you’re trying to make.
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14. Writing in Plain English
Straightforward
Understandable
Conversational
Plain English is a way of presenting information in a simple, unadorned style so that your audience can easily grasp your meaning, without struggling through specialized, technical, or convoluted language. The Plain English Campaign (a nonprofit group in England campaigning for clear language) defines plain English as language “that the intended audience can read, understand and act upon the first time they read it.” You can see how this definition supports using the "you" attitude and shows respect for your audience.
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15. Using the Right Voice Active Voice Passive Voice
Subject + Verb + Object
Object + Verb + Subject
Vigorous
Concise
Direct
Reserved
Tactful
Indirect
Your choice of active or passive voice also affects the tone of your message. You are using active voice when the subject ("actor") comes before the verb, and the object (“acted upon”) comes after the verb: "Joe rented the car." You are using passive voice when the subject follows the verb and the object precedes it: "The car was rented by Joe." As you can see, the passive voice combines the helping verb to be with a form of the verb that is usually similar to the past tense.
Use the active voice to produce shorter, stronger sentences and make your writing more vigorous, concise, and generally easier to understand. The passive voice is not wrong grammatically, but it is often cumbersome or unnecessarily vague, and it can make sentences longer. Nevertheless, using the passive voice can help you demonstrate the "you" attitude in some situations:
When you want to be diplomatic about pointing out a problem or error of some kind.
When you want to point out what's being done without taking or attributing either the credit or the blame.
When you want to avoid personal pronouns in order to create an objective tone.
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16. Composing the Message Word Choice Sentences Paragraphs
The most successful messages have three important elements: strong words, effective sentences, and coherent paragraphs.
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As you compose your first draft, let your creativity flow. Don’t try to draft and edit at the same time or try to make everything perfect. Realize that you’ll revise and edit later.
Transition words and phrases tie ideas together and show how one thought is related to another.
Use connecting words
Echo a word or phrase from a previous paragraph or sentence
Use a pronoun that refers to a noun used previously
Use words that are frequently paired

17. Choose Strong Words Correct Effective Abstract Concrete
Effective messages depend on carefully chosen words. Start by paying close attention to correctness. Poor grammar implies that you are uninformed. Worse still, poor grammar can imply that you do not respect your audience enough to get things right.
Just as important as selecting the correct word is selecting the most suitable word for the situation at hand. The right words can make all the difference in the success of your communication. However, word effectiveness is generally more difficult to achieve than correctness.
Words vary dramatically in their degree of abstraction or concreteness. An abstract word expresses a concept, quality, or characteristic. Abstractions are usually broad, encompassing a category of ideas, and are often intellectual, academic, or philosophical. In contrast, a concrete word stands for something you can see, touch, or visualize. Most concrete terms are anchored in the tangible material world.
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Follow these steps when choosing strong words:
Pay attention to grammatical correctness.
Select the most suitable word.
Balance abstract and concrete words.
Abstract (truu tuong) words express concepts, qualities, or characteristics.
Concrete (cu the) words stand for something we can touch, see, or visualize.
When trying to find words that communicate well, do the following:
Choose powerful words
Choose familiar words
Avoid clichés and use buzzwords carefully
Use jargon carefully

18. Communicate Effectively
Choose Powerful
Words
Choose Familiar
Avoid Clichés
and Buzzwords
Use Jargon
Carefully
Anyone who earns a living by crafting words is a wordsmith—including journalists, public relations specialists, editors, and letter and report writers. Unlike poets, novelists, or dramatists, wordsmiths don’t strive for dramatic effects. Instead, they are concerned with using language to be clear, concise, and accurate. You can use the following wordsmith techniques to help you write effective workplace messages:
Choose powerful words. Choose words that express your thoughts most clearly, specifically, and dynamically. Nouns and verbs are the most concrete, so use them as much as you can. Adjectives and adverbs have obvious roles, but they often evoke subjective judgments. Verbs are especially powerful because they tell what’s happening in the sentence, so make them dynamic and specific.
Choose familiar words. You’ll communicate best with words that are familiar to your readers. However, keep in mind that words that are familiar to one reader might be unfamiliar to another.
Avoid clichés and buzzwords. Although familiar words are generally the best choice, beware of terms and phrases so common that they have become virtually meaningless.
Use jargon carefully. Handle technical or professional terms with care. When deciding whether to use technical jargon, let your audience’s knowledge guide you.
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19. Write Effective Sentences
Choose the
Type of Sentence
Emphasize
Key Thoughts
Sentences come in four basic varieties: simple, compound, complex, and compound-complex.
A simple sentence has one main clause (a single subject and a single predicate), although it may be expanded by nouns and pronouns serving as objects of the action and by modifying phrases.
A compound sentence has two main clauses that express two or more independent but related thoughts of equal importance, usually joined by a coordinating conjunction. In effect, a compound sentence is a merger of two or more simple sentences (independent clauses) that are related.
A complex sentence expresses one main thought (the independent clause) and one or more subordinate thoughts (dependent clauses) related to it, often separated by a comma.
A compound-complex sentence has two main clauses, at least one of which contains a subordinate clause.
In every message, some ideas are more important than others. Incorporating the following techniques into your sentences will help you emphasize key ideas:
Devoting more words to them
Putting them at the beginning or end of a sentence
Making them the subject of the sentence
Using dependent clauses
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20. Craft Good Paragraphs Topic Sentence Support Sentences Transitions
Unity
Coherence
Readers expect each paragraph to be coherent—to present an idea in a logically connected way. While paragraphs vary widely in length and form, most contain three basis elements: a topic sentence, support sentences to develop the topic, and transitional words and phrases.
Every properly constructed paragraph is unified; it deals with a single topic. The sentence that introduces that topic is called the topic sentence. The topic sentence gives readers a summary of the general idea that will be covered in the rest of the paragraph. In informal and creative writing, the topic sentence may be implied rather than stated. In business writing, the topic sentence is generally explicit and is often the first sentence in the paragraph.
Support sentences explain, justify, or extend the topic sentence; therefore, they are more specific than the topic sentence. These sentences must all have a bearing on the general subject and must provide enough specific details to make the topic clear. In addition, each sentence is clearly related to the general idea being developed, which gives the paragraph its unity.
Transitions are words or phrases that connect ideas by showing how one thought relates to another. They also help alert the reader to what lies ahead, so that shifts and changes do not cause confusion. In addition to helping readers understand the connections you are trying to make, transitions give your writing a smooth, even flow.
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21. Paragraph Development
Illustration
Classification
Cause and effect
Problem and solution
Compare and contrast
The best way to achieve unity and coherence is to use paragraph structures that are (1) familiar to your readers, (2) appropriate to the ideas you are trying to portray, and (3) suited to your purpose. Five of the most common paragraph development techniques are illustration, comparison or contrast, cause and effect, classification, and problem and solution.
Illustration involves giving examples that demonstrate the general idea.
Classification shows how a general idea is broken into specific categories.
Cause and effect focuses on the reasons for something.
A problem and solution paragraph presents a problem and then discusses a solution.
Comparison or contrast paragraphs use similarities and differences to develop the topic.
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22. Format with Technology
Style Sheets
and Templates
Auto-Completion
and Auto-Correction
File Merge
and Mail Merge
Endnotes
and Footnotes
Indexes and
Tables of Contents
Document Wizards
Today's word-processing software provides a wide range of tools to help writers compose documents. Most of these tools take care of the "housekeeping chores" often associated with business document preparation, allowing you to focus on the creative aspects of writing.
Style sheets. Most word processors offer some form of style sheets, which are master lists of predefined styles for headlines, paragraph text, and so on.
Templates. A template provides standardization on a larger scale, defining such factors as page design, available fonts, and other features. Templates can include boilerplate, sections of text that are reused from document to document.
Auto-completion. Software called auto-completion (or something similar) inserts a ready-made block of text when you type the first few characters.
Auto-correction. This feature instantly corrects spelling and typing errors and converts text to symbols.
File merge, mail merge. Today's software makes it easy to combine files—an especially handy feature when several members of a team write different sections of a report.
Endnotes, footnotes, indexes, and tables of contents. Your computer can also help you track footnotes and endnotes, renumbering them every time you add or delete references. For an index or a table of contents, you can simply flag the items you want to include, and the software assembles the lists for you.
Wizards. Programs offer wizards that step you through the process of creating letters, résumés, and other common documents.
As with every other communication technology, using these tools efficiently and effectively takes some balance. You need to learn enough about the features to be handy with them, without spending so much time that using the tools compromises the writing process.
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