1. Pastoral Care and the Deacon
Who we are
and how we serve

2. The call of the deacon
Receive the Gospel of Christ, whose herald you now are. Believe what you read, Preach what you believe, & practice what you teach.

3. Ministry of presence Being with the other person
Show that you are physically present non-verbal indicators
Show that you are mentally present active reflective listening
Show that you are emotionally present -acceptance, UPR, grace, heart
Show that you are spiritually present openness to spirituality, soul

4. A listening Ear
Many people are looking for an ear that will listen. They do not find it among Christians, because Christians are talking when they should be listening. He who no longer listens to his brother [or sister] will soon no longer be listening to God either. One who cannot listen long and patiently will presently be talking beside the point and never really speaking to others, albeit he be not conscious of it. Dietrich Bonhoeffer - Life Together

5. We are God’s presence
How is listening to our brothers/sisters connected to listening to God?
Job 2:13
Our listening that leads to
healing & hope

6. Creative Ministry-Henri Nouwen
In the search for his professional identity, the minister moves from self-affirmation to self-denial;
In the establishment of a professional relationship , he moves from contract to covenant;
And in his professional approach to the individual needs of his fellow man, he moves from role definition to contemplation

7. Becoming a faithful witness
From professional with special information special training, and special skills …he has to move beyond professionalism, and through self denial and contemplation, & become a faithful witness of God’s covenant.

8. Jesus with those in need…
Woman at the well
John 4:4-26
Mary Magdalene
Luke 8:1-3
Nicodemus
John 3: 1-21
Centurion’s daughter
Luke 7: 1-10
The Healing at the Pool at Bethesda
John 5:2-9
Way to Emmaus
Luke 24:13-29
Lepers
Luke 17:11-19
Lazarus-Martha & Mary
John 11:1-19
Jesus Heals a Paralytic
Mark 2:1-5
Other:

9. Physical Presence Show that you are physically present
Avoid distractions,
phone calls
non-verbal indicators:
Presence, nodding, stance
(a quick aside : sit closest to door)

10. Mental Presence Show that you are engaged fully through…
active/ reflective listening
summarizing, paraphrasing,
comfort level with silence/tears ?

11. Spiritual Presence Openness to spirituality
Where do you see God in this?
How might this situation be
affecting your faith?
Acknowledge that God is in the
messiness and ordinariness
of everyday life

12. Attending & caring behavior
Inviting the person to talk
Careful listening
Following the person’s lead
Empathetic responding
Clarification
Exploring other areas
Challenge lovingly-when needed
Understanding

13. Some basic skills See article entitled:
Instructions for Beginning to Practice Client-Centered Therapy by Barbara Temaner- Brodley, Ph.D.
Found at:
Purpose of article: to review essential listening skills for pastoral care ministers
-not absolute—simply reminders

14. Homework EXPERIMENT with the speaker –listener technique
Invite your friend, spouse, colleague or your bff to also read this article. Then try an
EXPERIMENT
with the speaker –listener technique
Talk for five minutes using insights from article. Then reverse roles.
Discuss the experience with partner.
Try it again.

15. Questions to ask yourself & your conversation partner
How was this exercise different for you?
What worked well?
What needed improving?
When it was my turn—how did I do? Your partner?
How much did I talk when the other person was speaking? (guestimate-for e.g %)
How is it different when I speak in a church setting, at the office, with a loved one?

16. Prayer
God –I thank You for the gifts that you have given me and the responsibilities that come with them. Direct my thoughts and words O Lord, so that I can be Your presence to all whom I come into contact with.
Help me Lord to be fully attentive to the person before me, and not be distracted by my jumbled thoughts and concerns.
Assist me O Lord to be truly present to your people—to you, Jesus - in the person asking for my attention.
I make this prayer…believing that Your Holy Spirit will guide and direct me … and so I give You thanks and praise—Father, Son and Spirit. Amen.