1. Emotional Intelligence at Work
Presented by:
Maribeth Bohley

2. ACTIVITY What are you feeling right now?
Feeling Board with circle stickers.
Discuss distribution of feelings in the room

3. What is Emotional Intelligence (EI/EQ)?
Emotional intelligence is the capacity of individuals to recognize their own, and other people's emotions, to discriminate between different feelings and label them appropriately, and to use emotional information to guide thinking and behavior.(Wikipedia)
Popularized by Daniel Goleman in “Emotional Intelligence” and “Working with Emotional Intelligence.”
That recognition of emotion is one aspect of emotional intelligence. For those who would like to explore more about emotional intelligence, there is an increasing body of research about emotion which is supported by neuro-biological data, a fascinating field! Here is the basic definition supplied by Wikipedia. Most of what we discuss today will be from the work of Daniel Goleman through his books “Emotional Intelligence” and “Working with Emotional Intelligence.”

4. Six Primary Emotions Ekman Anger Fear Disgust Surprise Enjoyment
Sadness
Contempt
Love
Shame

5. ACTIVITY Facial expression tutorial
Group Activity: “Reading Emotions”
Get into groups of 3-5
Show next slide
Have groups label each picture with emotion being portrayed

6. A B. C D E.

7. Why Emotional Intelligence (EQ)?

8. Advantages of Strong Emotional Intelligence
Deeper personal relationships
Greater adaptability
Increased personal insight
Greater influence over others
Fewer impulsive decisions
Reduced stress
Improved social skills
Increased confidence
Set of skills you can use to draw the best from yourself and others.
Emotional intelligence supports your IQ. (EQ + IQ=Awesome)
EQ success factor in work and all relationships
Look at this long list of advantages! (read list) These are all compelling reasons to increase our emotional intelligence.

9. The Four Emotional Intelligence Skills
Self Awareness
Self Management
Social Awareness
Relationship Management
These two competencies are made up of four core skills that allow an individual to recognize and understand his/her own emotions and those of others, and to use his/her emotions to manage his/her behavior and relationships. These skills are Self-Awareness, Self-Management, Social Awareness, and Relationship Management.

10. 1. Self-Awareness The Ability to Be aware of ones’ own emotions
Understand ones’ own emotional reactions
Express ones’ emotions effectively in socially appropriate ways
Demonstrate self-confidence
Understand when an emotional state is present.  
Differentiate emotions
Recognize blended emotions
Ability to…
Self-awareness includes emotional awareness, accurate self-assessment, and self-confidence. These are not as easy as they look. How often do you stop and consider how you are feeling in the moment? How would you describe your emotion right now? … The words for emotions are not always easy to find when we need to pinpoint how we are feeling. As the second point suggests, we can also be a bit off in assessing our true feelings because our rational mind denies what we are feeling in favor of what we “should” feel. This is not a good idea, especially when it is telling us something like, “I am not afraid” when we are shaking in our boots!
True self-confidence does come from honest awareness of our strengths and attributes.
Awareness That an Emotional State Is Present. You're aware that an emotion is present; however, you may have a hard time figuring out exactly what emotion it is. For instance, you may have enough awareness to know that you feel "bad" or "overwhelmed," but nothing more specific than that. This is sometimes termed an undifferentiated emotional state.  
Differentiated Emotional Awareness. We are now getting to the top levels of emotional awareness. At this level, you're aware of specific emotions that are present. You're able to identify the emotion you're feeling, such as sadness, anger, fear, anxiety, happiness, joy, or excitement, at any given point in time.
Blended Emotional Awareness. This is the top level of emotional awareness. You're aware of a number of emotions that are present at the same time, including emotions that may seem in opposition to one another, such as sadness and happiness. (For example, a mother seeing her child go off to school for the first time may be very happy her child has reached this milestone but also sad to see her child growing up so fast.)

11. 2. Self-Management The ability to manage emotions
control impulses caused by emotions
self-motivate

12. Social Awareness/Empathy
The ability to
be aware of other’s emotions
understand other’s emotions
relate to others on an emotional level/empathize

13. 4. Relationship Management
The ability to
solve problems involving others when intense emotions are involved
Influence other’s emotional states
Work with others toward shared goals
Create group synergy in pursuing collective goals

14. How to Improve Your Emotional Intelligence
This aspect of your personality is worth working on. The most important thing to keep in mind that EI is a skill that can be learned by anyone who makes an effort to become emotionally resilient.
Your personal growth starts with greater self-awareness. It’s important to recognize your own reactions in emotional situations. You don’t need to analyze those reactions; you just observe them with great awareness. Over time, this practice of detached observance will help you gain better control over those reactions.
Emotional intelligent persons are not rocks. They still experience sadness, happiness, anxiety, excitement, and all other emotions. The intelligent part is in their ability to control the state of irritability. When you find yourself in a stressful situations and your first instinct is to start yelling, take a deep breath. Remember what you’ve been working for, and try to understand where other people’s behavior comes from. When you become a better empath, you will learn that treating other people with respect in every possible situation is the best way to achieve your own goals.
Open up to different opinions. Listen to people without any prejudices. If you don’t agree with them, be thankful for their honesty and explain your own stand without getting overly passionate about it.
Tools that Help You Develop EI
Don’t worry; you’re not alone in this journey. There are some tools that help people work on themselves and develop different aspects of emotional intelligence. Here are 5 online tools you can try:
Inner Balance Transformation System
When you connect the Inner Balance Sensor to your iOS smartphone or tablet and you install the app, it will start measuring your heart rhythms. The system is supposed to get you into a consistent meditative state. The technique i simple: you look at the way the colorful circle on the screen expands and contracts, and you synchronize your breathing according to the instructions. This practice will balance out your heart rate.
If you’ve been trying too hard to meditate but you haven’t achieved success, you’ll love the Inner Balance Transformation System because it will quickly get you in a state of relaxation.
The 12 Tools
This collection of tools has been created with the goal to inspire children to develop emotional intelligence through 12 different practices. It’s perfect for parents who want to work with their children, but the tools are also useful for people of all generations, as long as they want to start building EI from its foundation.
The 12 tools teach you how to breath, find your quiet/safe place, listen, care for others, respect your personal space, take time-in and time-away, let things go, use your own words, apologize and forgive, say please and thank you, become more patient, and become more courageous. All these aspects of your personality are super important when you want to build emotional intelligence.
MEIT Emotional Intelligence
This is a simple Android app that will test your ability to perceive, understand, and manage your EI. You’ll need to complete a simple questionnaire and recognize the emotions being presented through animations and pictures. The app is realistic and entertaining, but it’s also very useful.
Mood Meter
Remember what we said: you need to become aware of your own emotions if you want to control them with intelligence. This app (available for both Android and iOS devices) helps you discover the nuances in your feelings, reveal their causes, and enhance your ability to manage them.
TED
Install this app on your phone, and you’ll get access to thousands of TED talks that make you more attentive to everything that surrounds you. Here are few talks on EI you can check out:
Why aren’t we more compassionate? – Daniel Goleman
What really matters at the end of life – BJ Miller
Embrace the shake – Phil Hansen
How to make stress your friend – Kelly McGonigal
5 ways to listen better – Julian Treasure

15. Having these skills is what makes a person emotionally intelligent but they don’t guarantee that you will be emotionally competent on the job, it only means that you have excellent potential to learn them. Emotional Intelligence is the basis for the Emotional Competencies that make success possible.

16. The Emotional Competence Framework
Personal Competence
Self-Awareness
Self-Regulation
Social Competence
Empathy
Social Skills
The emotional competence framework is divided into two types of competence: personal and social. We will expand on those categories here. Personal competence includes self-awareness and self-regulation

17. Improve your EQ by:
Listening – focus on really hearing what’s said and not said (verbal & nonverbal)
Pausing - Stop and think
Reflecting - Think about interactions and gain valuable learning for future
This step is something you can do by yourself as an extension of your observations. Since this involves others, you can include who the other people are and how you respond to those actions. Does it make a difference who it is that you are responding to? Make a note of that and interpret why you are thinking, feeling, or behaving what you are about that particular individual. How might you use that information to change your emotional response?
Listening – focus on really hearing what’s said and not said (verbal & nonverbal)
Focus attention on what’s going on inside you
Focus on what people are saying with words and nonverbally
Practice being silent through an entire meeting and just listening
Pausing - Stop and think
Think before speaking
Breathe
Reflecting - Think about interactions and gain valuable learning for future
Reflect on your own experiences and behavior
How did members of the team respond/react?
What would you do differently next time?

18. What skills do employers want?
Good communicators - Listening & oral communication
Resilient - Adaptability and creative responses to setbacks and obstacles
Personal management – self-control and self-confidence
Motivated – ambition to work toward goals
Team player – works well with others, cooperative
Conflict management - skilled at negotiating disagreements
As you read job postings and job descriptions, you may notice that emotional intelligence traits are included in those descriptions. The situational interviewing method used by most employers incorporates questions to uncover these skills. Those who are doing the interviewing are looking for people who will fit into their team and “play well with others.” So – they pose situations such as, “Tell us about a time when you were delayed on a project because a co-worker did not supply the information you needed. What did you do?” Another example – “What career achievement makes you proud?”
These questions get asked because the prospective employer finds that past performance often predicts future performance, and the job candidate’s story of previous experience reveals their use of emotional intelligence.

19. Thank you!