1. Presented by Flip Brown Business Culture Consultants
Vermont Human Resources Association
State Conference
September 8, 2016

2. Here’s the “secret”
Your life should be in your work, not separate, although work should be different from life
Balance is an internal, not external process
How you see, hold, and talk to yourself is key
It’s a given that others will not really get it
There is no “done” – it’s a continual process

3. #1 What you do is not who you are

4. Career is only a role Competency is not identity
Neither is saving the world
Work serves our life, not the reverse
Watch out for excessive validation needs
Remember “right livelihood”

5. #2 Watch out for negative self-talk

6. Reduce the negative internals
We set high standards for ourselves
No one is as hard on us as we are
Our internal judgment is conditional
We hold on to a “someday” myth
Practice “radical self-acceptance”

7. #3 Vulnerability is strength (at times)

8. Appropriate professional vulnerability
Openness is a sign of strength
Growth often comes from the “disconfirming”
Power without it is cold and distant
Too loose and it’s poor boundaries
When in doubt, ask!

9. #4 Emotional reactivity as a tool

10. Reacting to our reactivity
We all have times when we “lose it”
Awareness-in-the-moment creates options
Those who push our buttons teach us
Mirroring from others is most helpful
The patterns never go away – just less “grab”

11. #5 Expect the unexpected

12. “But I thought I could plan . . .”
You can never totally predict your day
Attachment to what “should be” doesn’t work
If you’re “swept along” stop to center
Carve out time for “important, not urgent”
What’s the best use of your energy now?

13. #6 Limits and boundaries serve us

14. Limits and boundaries define things
No one will necessarily set them for us
They can be task or relationship based
Block off at least one hour of focus time
Do you need to examine martyr syndrome?
Master the art of the limited conversation

15. #7 Take a break!

16. Stop now to go on We’ve shifted from “coffee break” to 24/7
Human being or “human doing?”
Brain imaging shows value of being in nature
Real people are better than screens, right?
Set “Don’t Even Peek” times for digital detox

17. #8 Supportive confrontation

18. “Supportive confrontation” is . . .
To be of service by focusing on principles and values even if it’s a difficult conversation
We separate business from emotion
We don’t make or take it personally
It may take more than one discussion
The improved connection is worth the risk

19. #9 The art of healthy detachment

20. The art of “healthy detachment”
We’re fully and compassionately engaged
We do not add our own trauma or drama
We operate from “observer mode”
In the end all we can do is the best we can do

21. #10 Work as a vehicle for fulfillment

22. Meaning and fulfillment matters
If you’re not enjoying your work, work on it
Are you in a values-aligned culture?
Does work connect you with self and spirit?
Can you change your “viewing and doing”?
When all else fails, lower your expectations!

23. Thank You! . . . for your energy and participation.
. . . for taking care of yourself and your employees.
. . . for all you do to make Vermont and the world a better place in which to work and live.