1. Definition and Warnings
Dating Violence
Definition and Warnings

2. Dating and Domestic Violence
A pattern of behavior used to establish power and control over another person through fear and intimidation, often including the threat or use of violence.
Occurs when one person believes they are entitled to control another person and the parties are involved in an intimate relationship.

3. Statistics on teen dating violence
1 in 8 teens will experience physical violence in a dating relationship.
1 in 4 will be in an abusive relationship, although it may not involve physical violence
80% of the assaults will include pushing, shoving, slapping and grabbing.
95%of the reported incidents are committed by males
Victims and abusers come from all different social and economic backgrounds.

4. Types of dating violence
Physical Can begin with threats of violence, punching fist through wall, escalate to pushing, slapping restraining etc. Finally it becomes life threatening.
Sexual--Can be unwanted touching, coercive or rape
Psychological--Mental violence can include constant verbal abuses, harassment, excessive possessiveness, isolating abused party from others. Destruction of property.

5. Warning signs of a partner who may become violent
Wants to get serious quickly. Will not take NO for an answer. Is jealous and possessive. Wants to pick partners friends and activities.
Is controlling and bossy. Makes the decisions. Put downs when alone or with friends.
Makes partner feel guilty, “If you really loved me you would…”
Blames the victim for what is wrong.”It’s because of you that I get so angry.

6. Warning Signs, pt 2
Apologizes for violent behavior, “I’ll never do it again.”
Has strong traditional ideas about what a man should be and what a woman should be.
Abuses alcohol and drugs
Tends to use violence to solve their problems. Gets in fights, has a quick temper.

7. Why teens stay in violent relationships
Afraid parents will make them break up
They are embarrassed or ashamed.
They are afraid the violence will escalate if they try to end the relationship
Convinced it’s their fault or that parents will blame them or be disappointed.
May think this is what a relationship is about. No experience with healthy dating relationships.

8. Why teen stay pt. 2 Afraid of losing privileges, car etc.
Believe that being involved with someone is the most important thing in their life.
They confuse jealousy with love
They do not realize they are being abused.
Think friends and family won’t believe them.
They have lost touch with friends
There is a mix of good times, and hope along with manipulation intimidation and fear

9. What to do if in an abusive relationship
Realize that it is not their fault or normal
Tell someone and ask for help to end the relationship.
Parents
Friends
Trusted adult
Counselor
Professional mental health worker
Police