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Restorative Circles for Families
By Dr. Lisa Hubbard
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What Is Restorative Justice
Restorative Justice is a framework for creating a restorative environment in a family. It strives to promote community, acceptance, and belonging in a safe environment that works at strengthening relationships and repairing harm. Restorative Practice is: - Respectful (Distinguishing behavior from the person) - Fair (engaging, with explanations and clarifying expectations) - Restorative by repairing harm and building relationships It will - Develop Empathy (through reflection, insight, and learning) - Enhance responsibility and accountability - Support positive behavioral change and the strengthening of relationships
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What is restorative Justice?
Restorative Justice is concerned with restoring relationships, establishing or re-establishing social equality in relationships. It involves the victim, the offender, and the community in a search for solutions which promote repair, reconciliation, and reassurance. Restorative justice empowers students to resolve conflicts on their own and in small groups, and it's a growing practice at schools around the country. Essentially, the idea is to bring students together in peer-mediated small groups to talk, ask questions, and air their grievances.
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Principles of restorative justice
Holding the wrongdoer directly accountable for the individual victim and the specific community affected by the wrong act. Requiring the wrongdoer to take direct responsibility for making things right to the degree that is possible. Encouraging the community to become directly involved in supporting victims, holding wrongdoers accountable, and providing opportunities for wrongdoers to reintegrate into the community(family).
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Why Restorative Circles?
A Restorative Circle is a community process for supporting those in conflict. It brings together the three parties to a conflict – those who have acted, those directly impacted and the wider community. Circles are a compelling symbol of community, connection, inclusion, equality, and wholeness. Meeting in a circle symbolizes that there is neither a head nor a tail and it establishes a level playing field for all participants. Circles are critical for restorative practices because parents and children are happier and children are more likely to make positive changes when parents do things with them, rather than to them or for them.
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Why Restorative Circles?
Restorative practices help deal with misbehavior, as well as more serious problems. Traditional punitive discipline does not achieve positive changes in student behavior. Restorative approaches enable those who have been harmed to convey the impact of the harm to those responsible, and for those responsible to acknowledge this impact and take steps to making the wrong right. A restorative family is one which takes a restorative approach to resolving conflict and preventing harm.
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Why restorative circles?
Restorative circles are designed to bring healing and understanding to the victim and the offender. Restorative circles is value driven and builds on respect, honesty, listening, truth, sharing and others. Restorative circles are fair and allow each person to have a voice and to work together in finding a solution.
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Restorative Circle Questions
Restorative questions are used to address challenging behavior or address someone who was harmed by another’s actions. Restorative questions seek to elicit the story of the actions and events, the thoughts and feelings associated with those actions and events, and solutions for making things right, rather than assigning blame and seeking justifications for behavior. These questions also create a feedback loop so that people can hear how their actions have affected others, and encourage them to take responsibility for those actions. They also pave the way for solutions to problems to be found.
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Restorative Circle Questions
Restorative questions are non-blaming and open ended, rather than loaded and leading. They promote introspection and are as much for the benefit of the person being asked the question as they are for the benefits of the questioner. Questions for responding to challenging behavior: What happened? What were you thinking about at the time? What have you thought about since? Who has been affected by what you have done? In what way? What do you think you need to do to make things right?
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Restorative Circle Questions
Questions for helping someone who has been hurt by another‘s actions are: What did you think when you realized what had happened? What impact has this had on you and others? What has been the hardest thing for you? What do you think needs to happen to make things right?
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Conclusions The process of Restorative Justice circles restores relationships and re-integrates individuals into the family and community and involves transformation on the part of those involved in the healing process. For this reason, restorative justice is often referred to as transformative justice.
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References Costello, B., Wachtel, J., and Watchtel, T. (2009). Restorative Circles in Schools. International Institute For Restorative Practices. Bethlehem, PA. Pranis, K. (2005). The Little Book of Circle Processes. Good Books. Intercourse, PA.
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