1. Juniors: Read Thoreau Sophomores: Notes on Syntax
October 6, 2017
Place your cell phone in the hotel room.
Sophomore Homework: Syntax Practice #1/ Memorize Notes for Syntax
Junior Homework: Memorize Thoreau Biography Notes

2. Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday
1st Period 7:25 – 8:25
2nd Period 8:30 – 9:30
3rd Period 9:35 – 10:35
Lunch A 10:35 – 11:05
Period 4A 11:10 – 12:10
Period 4B 10:40 – 11:10
Lunch B 11:10 – 11:40
Period 4B 11:45 – 12:10
Period 4C 10:40 – 11:40
Lunch C 11:40 – 12:10
Period 5 12:15 – 1:15
Period 6 1:20 – 2:20

3. Nuts and Bolts
For this RETAKE test only, if your retake was a lower score, you will keep your original. IN ALL FUTURE TESTS, you will get the retake score no matter how it compares.
One question was wrong on the answer key: He thrusts his fists against the posts and still insists he sees the ghosts. It is Consonance and Assonance. I made the point correction to those who got it right.
All “Uncoiling” paragraphs must be in Turnitin.com by the time class starts tomorrow.
Use the author’s name and word “line”in the first citation only, after that just the line number (12).

4. 16316453 6th Period Junior English Class Enrollment Key: Labor
Class ID #
st period 10th Honors
rd period Honors 10th
th period Honors 10th
th Period Honors 10th
th Period Junior English
Class Enrollment Key: Labor
First Citation (Mora line 1-3) Others (10)

5. Paragraphing the freshman way, in “chunks”
TS: Mora uses extended personification to add dimension to the tornado.
CD: She opens the poem, “With thorns, she scratches / on my window, tosses her hair dark with rain, / snares lightning…” (lines 1-3).
CM: By having the tornado scratch, toss, and snare, in the very beginning, the subject of the poem moves about quickly, but also creates a furious character – one on a tirade of destruction.
CM: This movement also gives a violent personality to the tornado – a personality of scraping thorns, moving darkness powerful enough to snare lightning; thus, showing the power of nature.
CD: Although the wind’s fierce persona is emphasized throughout the poem, Mora also brings her to rest in lines 19-22, “until she becomes / sound, spins herself to sleep, sand stinging her ankles, whirring into her raw skin like stars.”
CM: The poet slows down the movement of the wild woman by putting her to sleep, then giving the reader the image of the last bits of the windy vortex winding down to the earth by having them focus on her ankles.
CM: This winds the poem to a close as the tempest of the woman is stilled; it gives the full scope of her person as she, like all, must rest after exertion.
CS: Creating the personification helps the reader see the tornado as a woman on a tirade to accentuate its violent and destructive nature.

6. Weaving Paragraph Sample
Mora uses extended personification to add dimension to the tornado. By having the tornado “scratch,” “toss,” and “snare,” (lines 1-3) in the very beginning, the subject of the poem moves about quickly, but also creates a furious character – one on a tirade of destruction. This movement also gives a violent personality to the tornado – a personality of scraping thorns, moving darkness powerful enough to snare lightning; thus, showing the power of nature. Although the wind’s fierce persona is emphasized throughout the poem, Mora also brings her to rest in lines , slowing down the movement of the wild woman by putting her to sleep, then giving the reader the image of the last bits of the windy vortex winding down to the earth by having them focus on her ankles “until she becomes / sound” (22). This winds the poem to a close as the tempest of the woman “spins herself to sleep” (21) until she is stilled; it gives the full scope of her person as she, like all, must rest after exertion. Creating the personification helps the reader see the tornado as a woman on a tirade to accentuate its violent and destructive nature.

7. What do you see for each of these: techniques, connotations, tone connections, meaning of the evidence in its relation to theme…
“roars, and rivers leap”
“snares lightning”

8. Better:
Mora’s tornado onomatopoeticall y “roars,” to create a threatening tone, which causes the rivers to metaphorically “leap” out of the riverbank as if in fright.
Good: Mora’s tornado “roars,” which is onomatopoeia and has a scary tone. The roaring causes the rivers to “leap” in fright, which is a metaphor comparing the river to a scared animal.

9. Better: The tornado’s “roar[ing]” threatens the river which metaphorically “leap[s]” away to show how everything in the tornado’s path is endangered by its intensity.
Good: Roaring is associated with danger or fear which is the reason for the leaping river. Also, the metaphor shows how everything in natures becomes scared because of the intensity.

10. Quotations are embedded into the commentary
CRITERIA
YES
S/T NO
Quotations are embedded into the commentary
Quotations are five words or less
Avoids phrases like “in this quotation” or “this shows that”
Ideas/quotations are not repetitious
Each sentence begins with a different word
Commentary is written in the third person
Commentary is written in the present tense
Line numbers/page numbers are indicated after the quotation
Commentary is relevant to the thesis (if applicable)
Commentary is relevant to the topic sentence
Commentary explains the connotations of the patterns/techniques
Commentary explains the relevance to the overall meaning of the work

11. 1 2 3 4 5
Incomplete commentary is redundant to evidence or previous commentary.
Commentary neglects to explain evidences’ effect and relation to the meaning without redundancy.
Evidence’s relevance is not accurate and/or not explained enough to show relevance
Evidence is mostly set apart from the commentary and connected with phrases such as “this shows that.”
Emerging sometimes moves the ideas of the paragraphs forward.
Commentary sometimes explains evidences’ effect and relation to the meaning.
Evidence’s relevance is mostly accurate and somewhat explained
Evidence is sometimes integrated into the commentary.
Adequate commentary moves the ideas of the paragraphs forward.
Commentary explains evidences’ effect and relation to the meaning most of the time.
Evidence’s relevance is accurate and mostly clearly explained
Evidence is mostly integrated into the commentary.
Very good commentary is effective and moves the ideas of the paragraphs forward.
Commentary explains evidences’ effect and relation to the meaning.
Evidence’s relevance is accurate and clearly explained
Evidence is consistently integrated into the commentary without redundancy.
Excellent commentary is effective, cogent and moves the ideas of the paragraphs forward.
Commentary clearly explains evidences’ effect and relation to the meaning without redundancy.
Evidence’s relevance is accurate and thoroughly explained
Evidence is consistently and fluently integrated into the commentary without redundancy.

12. Peer Editing
I will group you up,
You will make pretty circles with your desk.
You will introduce yourself to those sitting around you.
You will open your Uncoiling paragraph.

13. Peer Evaluation
Exchange computers with each other, so that you can evaluate one another’s paragraphs.
Fill out the YES test for the person whose paragraph you are reading.
Highlight any errors you see in their writing.
When you are finished, go over your evaluation of each other’s paragraphs.
If there is anything you realize that you need to change in your paragraph, please do so and then submit it to turnitin.com.

14. Cell Phones and Emergency Passes
No cell phones in class unless I have specifically asked you to use them. THEY MUST BE OFF AND IN THE HOTEL in your desk number hotel suite.
3 Emergency Passes per semester. You must sign out with a time and I must sign the clipboard before you leave.
Why? Glad you asked…

15. Decorate me however you please. School appropriate, of course. 
When you’re done, turn your test in, pick up a folder and some markers and do this!
Jensen, Bobby Joe 1st
Decorate me however you please. School appropriate, of course. 

16. Homeroom Schedule 1st 9:05-9:40 2nd 9:45-10:20 Homeroom 10:25-10:50
3rd 10:55-11:30
4B 11:35-12:00
Lunch B 12:00-12:30
4B 12:35-1:00
5th 1:05-1:40
6th 1:45-2:20

17. Wednesday Schedule Period 1 9:05 – 9:35 Period 2 9:40 – 10:10
Lunch A 10: :20
Advisory A 11: :35
Advisory B 10: :25
Lunch B 11: :55
Advisory B 12: :35
Advisory C 10: :05
Lunch C 12: :35
Period 4 12:40 - 1:10
Period 5 1:15 - 1:45
Period 6 1:50 – 2:20

18. 3rd period Teacher desk Cabinets Cole W Michael B Ryan W Mattias S
Filing cabinet & shelf
Cabinets 13 14 17 21
Cole W
Teacher desk
Michael B
Ryan W 12 15 16 20
Mattias S
McAllister S 19 22
Jessie R
SSR Book Shelf 18
Camden R 23
Zach N 24
Zoe M
Desk
Mckay C 11
Carson M 25 28
Gavin M 4 10
Spencer M
Beatrice M 27
Olivia C 5
Taylor M 9
Lena L 3
Tyler Y 26
Lauren T 29
Blake L
Cabinets
Sammie W 8
Courtney B 6 2
Emma H 30
Catherine C 7
Jewel A 1 31
Josh Lee
Shai F
3rd period
Desk Kaylee S
Door
Teacher Area
Teacher Desk
Turn in Area
Desk
Doc Camera Area
Door

19. 4th period Teacher desk Cabinets Haley W SSR Book Shelf Conner W
Filing cabinet & shelf
Cabinets 13 14 17 21
Teacher desk 15 16 12 20
Haley W 19 22
SSR Book Shelf 18
Conner W 23
Kaylee T 24
Natalie L
Desk
Collin F 11
Ashley T 25 28
Palmer L 4
Wynter B
Peyton B 10 27
Grifffin Z 3
Kennedy S 5
Rian W 9
Haleigh 26
Lindsey F 29
Brooke K
Cabinets 6
Harleen R 8
Fernando M 2
Annie R 30
Sydney Z 7
Ryan M 1 31
Anam K
Lauren C
4th period
Desk Ava L
Door
Teacher Area
Teacher Desk
Turn in Area
Desk
Doc Camera Area
Door

20. 5th period Teacher desk Cabinets Abby F Autumn F Ali E Mason D
Filing cabinet & shelf
Cabinets 13 14 17 21
Abby F
Teacher desk 16
Autumn F 12 15 20
Ali E 19 22
Mason D
SSR Book Shelf 18
Amelia D. 23
Amanda F 24
Nicole L
Desk
Sydney R 11
Mason M 25 28
Kaity H 4 10
Ellie O.
Carson T 27
Luci G 3
Alison B 5
Lynnaya S 9
Amtoj K 26
Coco C 29
Anna J
Cabinets 6
Kalista W 8
Christina B 2
Jake R 30
Angela S 7
Aislind D 1 31
Megan V
Maddy W
5th period
Desk Ceithlinn G
Door
Teacher Area
Teacher Desk
Turn in Area
Desk
Doc Camera Area
Door

21. 6th period Teacher desk Cabinets Isaac H SSR Book Shelf Riley B
Filing cabinet & shelf
Cabinets 13 14 17 21
Teacher desk 12 15 16 20 19 22
Isaac H
SSR Book Shelf 18 23
Riley B 24
Colin H
Desk 25
Sergio P 11
Kaylie K
Julian J 28
Tristin B 10
Elijah H 4 27
Jaz J 5 3
Romeo C
Drew 9
Bailey L 26
Tosh N 29
Liam M
Cabinets 6
Anthony C 8
Katlyn P 2
Griffin K 30
Breckin W 7
Parker M 1 31
Tristan T
Mikey L
6th period
Desk
Door
Teacher Area
Teacher Desk
Turn in Area
Desk
Doc Camera Area
Door

22. Advisory Teacher desk Cabinets SSR Book Shelf Desk Elerie 4 Alex Jamie
Filing cabinet & shelf
Cabinets 13 14 17 21
Teacher desk 12 15 16 20 19 22
SSR Book Shelf 18 23 24
Desk 25 11 28
Elerie 4 10
Alex 27
Jamie 5
Julie 9 3
Aden
Brandon 26
Caleb 29
Jay
Cabinets 6
Androw 8
Carter 2
Natasia 30
Anna S 7
Camron 1 31
Jacob
Anna N
Advisory
Desk
Door
Teacher Area
Teacher Desk
Turn in Area
Desk
Doc Camera Area
Door