1. Consent, Boundaries & Communication
Understanding and Preventing Sexual Violence
Trigger warning: images and discussions of sexual violence

2. Sexual Violence
SEXUAL ASSAULT: any form of sexual contact/activity without voluntary consent.
Touching, grabbing, forced kissing, oral, anal or vaginal intercourse.
SEXUAL HARASSMENT: any communication that attacks another person’s sexuality, identity, safety.
Sex without consent is not sex. It is sexual assault.

3. Consent A voluntary agreement to engage in sexual activity.
Communicating YES on your own terms.
Look for enthusiasm!!!

4. The LAW Consent for yourself,
Trust/Power cannot be used to obtain consent,
Implying “NO” = Saying “NO”,
Change your mind ANYTIME,
Awake, conscious, and sober enough.
Has to happen at each stage of the activity.

6. Age of Consent Age of teen 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 Age of sexual partner12 13 14 15 16 17 18
Age of sexual partner  A 19 20
21+
Sexual activity is LEGAL - "close in age" exemption applies
ILLEGAL
A = Anal Intercourse

7. Stand up for an activity
TO SHARE, OR NOT TO SHARE?
Stand up for an activity

8. Coercion
When you manipulate, bribe, threaten, or guilt some one into doing something

9. Boundaries Individual – different for each person
Require self-awareness and self-esteem
Social – reflect values and beliefs
Guidelines for interactions with others
Personal, Social, Digital
What is acceptable or unacceptable behaviour
In every relationship
Change and Evolve
Short-term (eg. Mood) or
Long-term (eg. With experience or age)
Establish respect and Communicate

10. Statistics in Canada 6% of sexual assaults are reported to the police
Only 2-4% of all reported sexual assaults are false reports
15% of sexual assault victims are boys under 16
Half of all sexual offenders are married or in long term relationships
60% of sexual abuse/assault victims are under the age of 17
80% of sexual assault incidents occur at home
80% of assailants are friends and family of the victim
Over 80% of sex crimes victims are women

11. More Statistics

12. Wrap up If you love me, you’ll have sex with me
I just want to show you how much I care
There are plenty of other women who would, you know
You are soooo beautiful I can’t help wanting you
Oh, come on, you know you want to
Why did you come back to my place if you didn’t expect to have sex?
Don’t you find me sexy? Don’t you want me?
After everything I did for you (dinner, foreplay), this is the least you can do for me
Trust me
Here are some suggested responses respectively:
If you love me, you’ll respect my feelings and not push me into doing something I’m not ready for.
We can do (this). It shows we care about each other just as much
There isn’t another one of me. If you want to be with me, you’ll respect my wishes.
Thank you, I’m glad you think I’m beautiful, but that doesn’t mean we have to have sex.
No. I really don’t. I’ve got a lot of plans for my life, and getting pregnant would screw them up.
I came to your place to have fun; we can have fun without having sex.
I do find you sexy, but we don’t have to have sex to prove it.
I appreciate the things but I will not have sex with you to repay you.
I do trust you; I wouldn’t be with you right now if I didn’t.