1. Chapter 2: Self-Awareness

2. Self-Concept
Self-concept – Set of perceptions about different aspects of yourself and your abilities
Social identity – Part of the self that interacts with others; the self is rated in relation to other people
Physical identity – Degree of comfort about your body, appearance, and athletic ability
Mental self – How you feel about your cognitive abilities, logic, and reasoning
Emotional self – Feelings you have and how those feelings are expressed
Spiritual self – Part of you that connects to something greater than yourself

3. Dimensions of the self
Private self – Perceptions of thoughts, fears, hopes, and dreams; how you think about yourself
Public self – The part of yourself that you present to the world
Ideal self – How you would like to be
Congruence – Similarity between private self, public self, and ideal self

4. Self-Esteem
Self-esteem – How you feel about yourself based on perceptions about who you are and what you can accomplish
Self-esteem develops from three areas:
1. Social information and interaction
2. Social comparisons
3. Self-observation

5. Narcissism and Perfectionism
Narcissism – Overinflated sense of self where self-esteem is very high and is not supported by facts
Perfectionism – Desire to do everything right, full of self-doubt and fear, can cause anxiety
Increasing awareness of self-critical nature and all-or-nothing thoughts can help perfectionists cope and change their thought patterns

6. Improving Self-Esteem
1. Practice living consciously 2. Practice self-acceptance 3. Practice responsibility 4. Practice self-assertiveness 5. Practice living purposefully 6. Practice personal integrity

7. Improving Self-Esteem
Acknowledge where you are
Walk the talk – Behave the way you want to function
Set realistic goals
Concentrate on strengths and demonstrate them
Make positive changes in your lifestyle
Watch your “self-talk” – Are the statements about yourself accurate and valid?

8. Cognitive Restructuring
Thought distortions – Negative thoughts about the self that are inaccurate
All-or-nothing thinking – Viewing things in absolute terms
Overgeneralization – Viewing a negative event as a never-ending pattern of defeat
Filtering – Dwelling on the negative, ignoring the positive
Discounting the positives – Insisting that positive qualities don’t count

9. Cognitive Restructuring (cont.)
Jumping to conclusions – Concluding that things are bad without any definite evidence
Magnification or minimization – Blowing things out of proportion or shrinking their importance
Emotional reasoning – Reasoning from how you feel
Global labeling – Calling yourself names after perceived defeat
Blame – Blaming yourself for things you are not responsible for

10. Locus of Control
Internal locus of control – Believing you have control over life events
External locus of control – Believing an outside source, like fate or other people, controls life events
Strategies for developing an internal locus of control:
1. Changing self-talk
2. Changing aspects of your environment
3. Trying new activities

11. Self-Disclosure
Self-disclosure – Process of intentionally revealing information about yourself that others would not normally know
Requirements for self-disclosure: Deliberate, significant, and not already known by the other person
Self-disclosure can help people clarify their own thoughts and feelings, and build relationships with others

12. Johari Window
Four categories of self: 1. The Open Self – All of the information that you and other people know about you 2. The Blind Self – Part of you that others can see and you cannot; often called your “blind spot” 3. The Hidden Self – Information about yourself that you know but keep hidden from others. Keeping information hidden contributes to isolation and anxiety 4. The Unknown Self – Part of you that is outside of your conscious awareness

13. Johari Window

14. Shadow Self
Shadow self – Parts of ourselves that we prefer not to own; often originates from childhood experiences
The shadow self can impact an individual’s behavior if he or she does not explore it.
The shadow self can cause:
Exaggerated feelings about others
Negative feedback from others
Interactions that are troubling for others, impulsive acts
Exaggerated anger over other people’s faults

15. Masks Masks – Form of protection against what others might think of us
Masks can be used to gain approval from others. People often wear masks for a long time to pretend to be what others think they are.
Distinction between wearing masks and having different roles in life

16. Getting Attention Everyone wishes to be noticed and attended to.
The need for getting attention often motivates behavior.
Negative attention is better than no attention for some people.
Power victim – An individual who seeks negative attention and adverse reactions from others

17. Physical Contact
Kangaroo care – Skin-to-skin contact with premature infants
Infants who are massaged and touched cry less, sleep more, weigh more, are more active and alert, and tolerate noise better than infants who are not massaged.
Touch releases oxytocin, which promotes bonding, trust, and positive feelings about others.

18. Big Ideas: Chapter 2
Our self-esteem is affected by events early in life before we had the cognitive capabilities to deal with them rationally.
Self-esteem improves when you accomplish something. It is not the case that you must improve your self-esteem before you can accomplish something.
Having good self-esteem is different than being egotistic, narcissistic, or a perfectionist.
The more you know about why you act as you do, the better able you’ll be to take control of your life.