1. E T I Q U E T T E

3. List all proper etiquette

4. Etiquette
Etiquette is using proper MANNERS; it is treating people like you want to be treated.
We all want to be treated with kindness, consideration and importance.
How one defines this treatment
will vary from one person to another

5. Learning proper etiquette will benefit you
A person who is a stranger today, may turn out to be someone important to you later.
People tend to treat you better when you are nice.
It may get you a job
You learn what is expected of you in an adult culture.

6. General Rules to Remember
Treat others the way you want to be treated, with kindness, consideration and importance. Remember to ASK, NOT DEMAND when there is something you need.

7. General Rules to Remember
2. When in doubt, stay on the more conservative side. Always try to be as gracious as possible. Use PLEASE and THANKS-YOU whenever you can.

8. General Rules to Remember
Maintain EYE CONTACT with those with whom you speak. Try to look INTERESTED, even if you don’t feel like it. SMILE, making it natural. If you are stuck with someone boring, remember it is only for a short time!

9. General Rules to Remember
Learn how to SHAKE HANDS properly with someone. Here’s how:
Look in the eyes and smile
Hold out your right hand and make sure your whole hand grips theirs
Have a friendly grip.

10. General Rules to Remember
5. In introducing two people who don’t know each other, generally you introduce the OLDER to the YOUNGER, and the FEMALE to the MALE. If you know you will have to leave them shortly, try to give them some common ground for conversation with each other.

11. General Rules to Remember
6. Different cultures have different rules. Learn them beforehand, when needed. Clip… For instance…
One common example is the use of a finger or hand to indicate “come here please”. This is the gesture used to beckon dogs in some cultures and is very offensive. Pointing with one finger is also considered to be rude in some cultures and Asians typically use their entire hand to point to something.

12. Oriental Cultures
Refusing any food is an insult

13. Imagine this…
ou are inspecting a house with the possibility of purchasing it and you open a bathroom door to see a woman sitting naked in a bathtub. How would you expect the surprised woman to react? A British or American woman would cover her breasts with one hand and her genitals with the other, while a Swedish woman would cover only her genitals. A Muslim woman would cover her face, a Sumatran woman would cover her knees and a Samoan only her navel.

14. Uganda A sign of friendship is two men holding hands
In mainstream Western culture, eye contact is interpreted as attentiveness and honesty; we are taught that we should “look people in the eye” when talking. In many cultures, however, including Hispanic, Asian, Middle Eastern, and Native American, eye contact is thought to be disrespectful or rude, and lack of eye contact does not mean that a person is not paying attention. Women may especially avoid eye contact with men because it can be taken as a sign of sexual interest.

15. Conversations with Strangers
Most people like it when you try to find out more about them. Ask them about their
FAMILY AND FRIENDS
LIKES AND DISLIKES
HOBBIES AND RECREATION
Get people to talk about themselves

16. Conversations with Strangers
2. Listen for topics in which you and the other person have COMMON GROUND. This will give you openings for more conversations, if needed.

17. Conversations with Strangers
3. In general, avoid topics that may lead to fist fights, such as RELIGION, POLITICS, and SOME SPORTS.

18. Conversations with Strangers
4. Do not say any NEGATIVE things about other people, even if you are sure in your conversations. The person you are cutting down may be THAT PERSON’S BOSS, RELATIVE or FRIEND!

19. Talking to People with Disabilities
Video Clip…
1. To speak with them as you would speak to ANYONE ELSE.
2. That their wheelchair, can or seeing eye dog is their personal property, so please do not handle any of them WITHOUT THEIR PERMISSION.

20. Talking to People with Disabilities
To look at and speak with THE PERSON, not their assistant. Try to speak to someone in a wheelchair at EYE LEVEL, if possible by sitting down.
Don’t YELL AT A PERSON TO BE HEARD. For example, most blind people have hearing that works fine.

21. Talking to People with Disabilities
ASK if they need assistance for any specific things. Example:
“Could I open the door for you?”
Don’t assume that they want or need help. Don’t IGNORE them either.

22. Talking to People with Disabilities
6. Avoid personal questions about their CAUSE OF DISABILITY unless they let the conversation go that direction. 7. Stop and think how YOU WOULD FEEL. How would you want to be treated if you were in their shoes?

23. Special Occasions, Wedding and Funerals
1. When attending a wedding or funeral, especially if it is a religion different than your own, be very observant about the behavior of others. When in doubt, STAY ON THE CONSERVATIVE SIDE AND DO WHAT EVERYONE AROUND YOU DOES. When the bride enters the chapel, everybody STANDS in honor of her.

24. Special Occasions, Weddings and Funerals
You often will have an USHER seat you. You DO NOT get to choose!
Often the front rows are reserved for IMMEDIATE FAMILY.

25. Special Occasions, Weddings and Funerals
3. Use common sense in clothing. Wear DARK, SOMBER clothing to funerals; black is not always necessary. Wear formal or informal clothing to a wedding depending on the type of wedding and reception, but remember never to outshine the BRIDE! This is her special day. Avoid wearing WHITE.

26. Special Occasions, Weddings and Funerals
Be simple, sincere, and honest in your words. For a funeral, “I am so sorry for your loss”.
For a wedding, “Congrats! I hope you have many happy years together!”
Do not ask any PERSONAL or INTIMATE questions.
Wedding singer clip

27. Special Occasions, Weddings and Funerals
Some other ways to show you care when a friend has someone who dies is:
Give a hug
Send a card
Send flowers
Send food
Ask if they need help with anything

28. TALKING ON THE PHONE
When answering the phone, be sure to first SAY HELLO. Not “hey” or “what”.
Be sure to identify yourself
Say, “is ___there?”
When there is only one phone line, KEEP CALLS AS SHORT AS POSSIBLE”.

29. Talking on the phone Be sure to speak CLEARLY. Don’t MUMBLE.
When calling others, remember the TIME it is where they live.
When calling others, let the phone ring a reasonable number of time, such as 10 times.

30. Talking on the Phone
Be careful to dial the correct number. If you get the wrong number, APOLOGIZE and say, “I thought I dialed Is that your number?”
When speaking in public on a cell phone, KEEP IT SHORT. KEEP YOUR VOICE DOWN.

31. Dining Out and Formal Dinners
Some general rules
SIT UP STRAIGHT; no slouching until you get home. No elbows on the table.
Leave the body noises, off-color jokes, controversial topics and grudges until you LEAVE TO GO HOME, as well.
Follow the Golden Rule: TREAT OTHERS AS YOU WANT TO BE TREATED.

32. Basic Guidelines to Eating
First, look to the HOST or HOSTESS of the table for a bit of guidance. Eat SLOWER THAN THEY DO and watch him or her . Just IMITATE what they do and use your COMMON SENSE.
No one is ever in a HURRY at a formal dinner. Eat SLOWLY.

33. Basic Guidelines to Eating
3. You’ll see a plate in front of you and a lot of silverware on both sides of the plate. Forks are on the LEFT (all have four letters). So is the napkin, which is what you WIPE your mouth with.

34. Basic Guidelines to Eating
The knife and spoon are on the RIGHT. (Each has 5 letters).
Start with the utensil FURTHEST FROM THE PLATE.
Do not eat WITH YOUR FINGERS. If you can eat it with a fork at all, do so, even if it feels strange. When in doubt, follow the lead of the HOST OR HOSTESS.

35. BASIC GUIDELINES TO EATING
7. If there is a food you absolutely hate, KEEP YOUR OPINION TO YOURSELF. Cut up a few pieces of it and take a few sips or bites of it, enough to show you’ve tried it, but not so large that you gag! Talk a lot with others, keeping quiet about that food.

36. Basic Guidelines to Eating
8. When done with a course, place the utensil into the MIDDLE OF THE PLATE, so it will not fall out when being removed. It may also be placed on a SERVICE PLATE underneath the dish you ate them from. Never place the silverware back on the table. Once you pick it up, keep it in your hand or on your plate.

37. Basic Guidelines to Eating
9. Never LICK OFF AND SAVE your utensil for the next course. All that silverware by your plate is just for you. In formal restaurants, a waiter/waitress may remove the unused silverware.

38. Basic Guidelines to Eating
10. Start the meal with your NAPKIN PLACED UNFOLDED IN YOUR LAP. Wait for the host/hostess to place it in his/her lap. You do the same. This shows the start of the meal.

39. Basic Guidelines to Eating
11. Sip your soup with a spoon by tilting it AWAY from you, filling it up only part way and then brining it up to your lips. Do NOT bring your mouth down to the spoon. Watch out for sampling hot foods, as spitting out your food with an expletive is never good manners. No SLURPING NOISES OR BLOWING ON HOT FOOD.

40. Basic Guidelines to Eating
12. The bread does on the EDGE of your dinner plate, or on the BREAD AND BUTTER PLATE. Place the butter on the edge of your plate, not directly on your bread. Break off a small piece of bread, just big enough for 1 or 2 BITES, and butter JUST that much at a time.

41. Basic Guidelines to Eating
13. This meal is a great time for socializing and getting to know the other people near you. The meals are often served late (8 or 9 pm) and always take a long time to complete, so EAT A SNACK BEFORE YOU GO SO YOU DON’T RUSH THROUGH THE COURSE.

42. Basic Guidelines to Eating
If ordering from a menu, it’s okay to ASK what something is, especially if it’s in a foreign language. Define the following:
Escargot: SNAILS
Sweet Breads: EDIBLE ANIMAL GLANDS
Fried Eel with Winter Insects:

43. Basic Guidelines to Eating
15. If you are interviewing for a job that has a group interview in a formal restaurant, then try PRACTICING WITH OTHERS FIRST until it becomes easy. You will be judged on how you handle social situations, including TALKING WITH STRANGERS, TABLE MANNERS, and OVERALL POISE and SELF CONFIDENCE.

44. Basic Guidelines to Eating
16. If you dislike eating this way, remember that IT’S ONLY FOR A SHORT TIME.

45. Letter and Other Correspondence
No matter what the event, remember that 1. The SPELLING of all words, especially the NAME of the person should be correct. Read the note for punctuation and grammar. Remember that even on a computer, spell-check does not check everything.

46. Letter and Other Correspondence
2. Notes writing during periods of much EMOTION (breakups, etc.) should always be held for 24 hours and then re-read before you send them. If necessary, have a trusted, neutral person read them for THEIR FEEDBACK AND OPINION. Once something is sent the words cannot be TAKEN BACK and you may someday regret those words you wrote in anger.

47. Letter and Other Correspondence
3. The note to someone, especially if you do not know them ,need only be A FEW SENTENCES long. That is why thank you note cards are so small. Begin with an intro sentence, for example thanking them for the specific gift you received from them. The next sentence can be how you will use the gift. Finish the card with another general sentence, such as how much you appreciated them being at your wedding, hope to see them soon, etc. Before you use it, wear it or regift it, SEND A THANK-YOU NOTE!

48. Dear Aunt Mary, Thank you so much for the beautiful teapot for a wedding gift. I think it is one of the most unusual gifts I received. It was very thoughtful of you to get a gift that is truly one of a kind. I’ll look forward to using it. Thanks again for coming to our wedding. Sincerely, Teresa