1. Personal Narrative/ College Essay
Peer Revision #1
Personal Narrative/ College Essay

2. Pass your essay behind you.
Check for MLA format:
MLA heading
MLA page numbering
Title
12 pt. font, Times New Roman
2-3 pages (Sophomores)
Prompt at beginning & Word count at end (seniors)
1” margins

3. Pass to your right. Read the introduction ONLY.
Next to the introduction, write the strategies you see being used.
Put a  next to the introduction if it catches attention.
Put a  next to the introduction if it does NOT catch attention.

4. Random pass to anyone in the room.
Read the conclusion paragraph ONLY.
Underline the lesson learned in the paragraph.
Is the lesson specific? Does the lesson show depth of thought? Is it too shallow? Does it need more elaboration?
Make comments as needed on the lesson learned.

5. Pass behind you.
Read the essay and underline any dialogue that you see.
Check the dialogue format.
Is it punctuated correctly?
Is it indented if there is more than one speaker?
Does it have a dialogue tag OR is it obvious who is speaking?
Next to the dialogue, answer the question: What purpose does the dialogue serve in the essay?
If you are not able to tell why the dialogue is being used, OR if it seems random, please tell them to revise it so that it’s more purposeful.

6. Same Person. Does the essay tell a SINGLE story?
If not, please write a note at the TOP of the essay, telling the writer to focus on one story and delete the others.

7. Pass to your right. Read the entire essay.
Highlight any VOICE that you see:
Striking language
Exact language
Natural language
If there is any place that needs MORE voice, circle it and say “add voice.”
In essence, if any part of the essay is boring, it needs more voice!

8. Random pass to anyone in the room.
Read the entire essay.
Check for organization.
Does the story have a clear beginning, middle, and end?
Do all paragraphs make sense? Are they in the correct order? Do any paragraphs and/or sentences need to be moved?
Make comments accordingly.

9. Pass behind you. Read the entire essay.
If there is any word, any sentence, any part that does not make sense and needs revising, please put a STAR next to it.

10. Pass to the right. Read the entire essay.
Pay attention to grammar and mechanics.
Make any revisions necessary.
Remember, if you do not understand HOW to correct something, but you know it doesn’t sound right, simply put a ? Mark next to it!

11. Give the essay back to its original owner!!
And look over the corrections and comments