1. BASEAL Relationships - 2

2. L.O.1
I can tell you about a time I was embarrassed and what it felt like.
L.O.2
I know some things to do when I am embarrassed that will not make things worse.
L.O.3
I can use a problem-solving approach to sort out an embarrassing situation.
L.O.4
I can think about what embarrasses me and learn something
about me that I didn’t know before.
L.O.5
I have helped someone who felt embarrassed.

3. How do we feel if we are embarrassed?
Embarrassment can have both emotional
and physical effects on us.
Let us try to list some.
We can then make a “blushometer”.

4. Physical signs of embarrassment
could be...
blushing… shaking… stammering… ?

5. You will work in a small group to register
your emotional reaction to the statements
on the “Blushometer” on the next slide.

6. Embarrassed
We’ll colour each statement in shades of red to show how embarrassing it is.
The darker the red the more embarrassing!

7. We can
look more closely
at these feelings of
embarrassment
as we look at
the next
four
slides.

13. Perhaps you recognise some of these feelings.
Embarrassed people often feel ……
UPSET
ANGRY ……………. (at themselves or others)
AT A LOSS……. (they don’t know what to do)
VERY UNCOMFORTABLE ………… (inside as
well as “hot and bothered” on the outside)
Perhaps you recognise some of these feelings.

14. What is it that influences just how embarrassing we find a particular situation?
Let’s list some ideas….

15. Who is there or who sees and how much we care for their opinion;
Usually our embarrassment is influenced by:
Who is there or who sees and how much we care
for their opinion;
Whether what we did was intentional;
How bad we think what we have done is
– have we “let ourselves down”? –
and can this apply even if no-one knows?

16. Can you think of some embarrassing
situations that we can rate on the ‘blushometer’?
Type list for slide 35.

17. We can
look even more closely
at these feelings of
embarrassment after
we’ve read the
next s t o r y.

24. Some people find it embarrassing to be praised out loud in public.
We are going to stand somewhere on an imaginary line on the floor depending on how embarrassed we feel about the following statements.
The embarrassment levels are from “not at all” to “very much.”
The statements are:
Being praised in front of your parents,
Being praised in front of the class,
Being praised in front of a few close friends,
Being praised for work in a favourite subject.

25. Did you notice any patterns or gender
differences in where people stood?
Why is it embarrassing to be praised
in some situations and not in others?
for doing good work?

26. Insert magazine
or newspaper
article or video
clip re.
embarrassment.

27. In pairs discuss the following questions:
What can you or other people do when you feel embarrassed? What helps? What makes it worse?
a) at the time (when you are feeling the
physical effects of embarrassment);
b) later on, when you are able to problem-solve.
You might consider describing or acting out strategies that help.

28. Some strategies that might be useful at the time of your embarrassment might be:
Someone noticing your situation and distracting others by doing
something that takes the spotlight off you;
Shrugging your shoulders and laughing (at yourself);
Thinking “well everyone gets embarrassed about something”;
Deep breathing;
Smiling;
Ignoring it and walking away;
Saying something funny back;
Acknowledging that you feel embarrassed.

29. Some strategies that might be useful later on using the
Some strategies that might be useful later on using the problem-solving process might be to:
Ask someone not to do or say something as you find it
embarrassing (when it is not done or said intentionally);
When you are embarrassed because you have let yourself or
others down, admit that what you have done is wrong,
apologise and make amends.

30. Embarrassment is so horrible that sometimes
Embarrassment is so horrible that sometimes we will do anything to avoid feeling embarrassed.
This means that we are vulnerable to being bullied.
How could we avoid this happening?

31. When we are embarrassed it is difficult to think
sensibly and problem-solve.
Remember the work we did about
“fight” and “flight” responses
and the threats we sometimes feel.
When we have been overwhelmed by our
feelings it is sometimes difficult to think straight.
What behaviour might embarrassment lead us to use?

32. Remember: Feelings influence our behaviour.

34. situations you identified earlier – they are on the next slide.
Let us look at the list of embarrassing
situations you identified earlier –
they are on the next slide.
With a partner discuss how people might
react to those situations.
Be prepared to explain your findings
to the class.

35. Embarrassing situations you identified earlier:

36. Work in pairs.
Tell your partner something embarrassing that has happened to you or to someone you know. Then share your stories with another pair.

37. As a group choose one story and make a ‘freeze frame’ and a headline or caption to go with it.
Each character should say what they are thinking.
Be prepared to share your work – perhaps in a ‘hot –seat’!
The rest of the class will try to guess what happened.

38. Why did the embarrassed person behave as they did?
Was their motive a ‘fight’ or a ‘flight’ response to a threat?

39. One of you will play the part of a person who helps the embarrassed person to feel better.
We need to notice how the embarrassed person responds to help.
What dangers are there in trying to help?
When you go home tonight ask mum or dad about their most embarrassing moment!

40. Role-playing a scene from a morning television
We could help someone who is in an embarrassing situation through:
Role-playing a scene from a morning television
programme discussing what the person could do;
Creating a written response, in the style of an agony
aunt or uncle;
Creating a self-help sheet for someone feeling
embarrassed - what can people say or do to help
themselves when they are in this situation?

41. We will set up a class book of embarrassments.
Each of you can write or draw about an embarrassing moment you or someone you know has had.
We will collect your ideas and put them into
a book for the class to look at.

42. In what way do adults inadvertently embarrass children?
We could consider writing an open letter to all adults ‘advising’ them on what children find embarrassing and suggesting what adults should do instead.
We could consider such a letter to the boys in this class – or the girls.

43. We will make a display of descriptions of embarrassment e.g.
I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me.
I blushed as red as a beetroot.
I could have died….
I didn’t know where to put myself.
I could have kicked myself.