1. Buidling community together
Stages and Dynamics

2. Our life in a commuity
Our community experience can be life-giving or life-draining
Need to understand the normal dynamics in any community
We are healed and saved in the context of community
Claretian life and mission can be understood only in the perspective of a community, be it local, provincial or universal.

3. Stages in community life
Communities seem to grow in sequence from one stage to another in progression
Each stage is based on needs of the group and the members, and there arise feelings, and behaviours proper to each stage
It is important that all members take responsibility to work together to move the group to mature levels of functioning

5. Stage 1. Orientation How to go about?
Initial moment
Fear, anxiety, uncertainty
Need is security and safety
Withdrawal, silence, boisterousness, aggressiveness, shoiwng bravado
How to go about?
Create a climate where all feel safe and secure
Clarify expectations, norms, rules…

6. Stage 2: In-Out Characterized by the Sense of belongingness.
Some people feel part of the group and feel “in”
Others feel “out” and experience alienation
If the need is frustrated, people respond by fight or flight
Some become aggressive and appear to be in constant battle in the community, disputing everything. some develop a flight mode and a few become very neurotic. Some take a flight to the periphery of community and find nests outside.
How to deal: probe the resistance and invite those who feel aleanated to verbalize the feeling. Help the aleanated to experience a sense of belonging.
Who are the members who feel alienated?
How do we include and integrate everyone into the community?

7. Stage 3. UP/Down Predominant need is self esteem and esteem of others
Tend to put persons along a continuum from most-least important and valued in the community
Those who feel less valued react
Predominant spirit is competition. Conversations are often on achievement and status
Help each member to recognize his value to the community
Group discernment
Discover and appreciate the gifts of each one
What are the behavours most valued in this group?
Who is the most valued & who is least valued? Why?
How to enhance the esteem of all members?

8. Stage 4. Conflict Conflict is inevitable in any community
Most difficult stage in community life
Avoidance is the normal reaction
Important to to embrace and address conflict
How to deal with it?
Help community to name and deal with conflict.
Community learns to look at conflict positively as moment of growth
How do we deal with conflict?
What are my/our fears of conclict?
What are the conflicts that we avoid in our community?

9. Stage 5. Cohesion
Community achieves unity, peace and cohesion when it negotiates conflicts meaningfully.
Very productive period of community
Tendency to “nest” and become self satisfied
Can get caught up in self-maintenance and forget challenges of mission
Least effective time to use consensus in decision-making
The task at this time is to challenge the community to its mission
To focus beyond itself
When have I observed a tendency to nest?
Are we opting for security than the pain of challenges?
Does mission continue to be our motivating force?

11. Stage 6. Faith sharing Christian community is a faith sharing group
It needs a climate of trust, safety and security
Desire to share and simultaneious fear to open up to others cause ambivalence
Intense resistance to sharing: lack of trust, fear of being perceived as hypocritical, concern that my faith is poor
Perfectionism in community blocks faith sharing
How to deal?
Create a climate where members feel comfortable to share this intimate part of life
Invite community to faith sharing.
When do we truly share faith?
What are my fears?
How do my community perceive it?

12. Stage 7. Near/Far Community now is an orchestrated dance
Members look for a level of intimacy and sharing that they feel comfortable. Members bring different needs and expectations form intimacy into community
Need a balance among the varying intimacy needs of members
Some look for more than community can give and get frustrated
Develop one’s personal capacity for intimacy
Clarify expectations of intimacy
What level of intimacy do I expect and desire in community?
What fosters intimacy in community?

13. stage. 8. Termination Help community to process the experience of loss
Every group has to die
Second most difficult stage
Failure to accept change and termination blocks growth
Celebrations of initiation and conclusion
needs also intentional grieving
Resistance to change is normal.
Help community to process the experience of loss
Allow a process of grieving
What previous losses in my life are an unfinished business?
How do we address loss?

14. Dynamics of interaction in community Interpersonal dynamics among members
Functions
A move provides direction
A follow enables completion
An oppose Creates correction
A bystand Offers perspective
Behaviour
1. A move: initiates a squence of behaviour-
2. A follow: supports a move-
3. An oppose: opposes move-
4. A bystand: observes and make comments-

16. Avoid three archetypes
All the four are present and contributes to community living.
Community may value only one or two of the behaviours and utilize only one or two of the functions and impoverish itself.
Avoid three archetypes
Point-counterpoint. Only move and oppose. Always counter-arguments
Courteous compliance: uncritical submission “Yes Father”.
Covert opposition. Passive aggression or indirect resistance

17. Build community