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Academic Voice, Precise Verbs, and Embedding Quotations
Writing and Editing
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“There are two typos of people in this world: those who can edit, and those who can't.”
― Jarod Kintz
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What’s wrong with this extract?
Clearly we can see that Robert Frost does a magnificent job appealing to the reader’s own sense of loneliness. It is evident that the man is an American genius.
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What’s wrong with this extract?
When Woolf says that the absence of “the rebel in [Jane Austen’s] composition” is the chief reason why she does not appeal to some readers, Woolf really shows the rebellious nature of her own literary sensibility.
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What’s wrong with this extract?
T.S. Eliot, in his “Talent and the Individual,” uses gender-specific language. “No poet, no artist of any art, has his complete meaning alone. His significance, his appreciation is the appreciation of his relation to the dead poets and artists” (Eliot 29).
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What works well with this extract? Any fixes?
For example, when the speaker describes the men’s physical condition he explains they were, “Drunk with fatigue; deaf even to the hoots of tired, outstripped Five-Nines that dropped behind”.
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What works well with this extract?
Severe diction such as “gargling” and “corrupted” are also used to express the horrifying past of the speaker. Both these quotes from the poem affirm that war is not “sweet and proper”.
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What’s working? How can we improve this?
Throughout the novel, words such as “lashed”, “coldly”, “pugnacious”, “stared levelly”, and “stiffened” have been used in the process of characterizing Curley. These words all have a negative connotation which connects Curley to being cold and rude.
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Part I: Academic Voice Read one of your essay responses carefully.
Highlight any uses of 1st or 2nd POV Highlight any use of past tense in reference to literature Highlight any reference to the author by first name Highlight all informal or colloquial language Highlight all cheerleading, jeering, or reviewing of the author’s talents Highlight any use of “author” in poetry when it should be “speaker”. Highlight and then strike through (with zest) any of the following phrases: I think, I believe, I feel, to me, it seems, kind of, sort of, this shows that
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Part II: Precise Verbs Read one of your essay responses carefully, and look for the verbs that refer to the author’s purpose or intent. Circle the following weak verbs: said, says, state, states, stated, demonstrates, shows Now replace each of those verbs with a more precise choice from your lists.
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Part III: Embedding Quotations
Read one of your responses carefully. Underline each sentence in which you use a quotation. In the margins, use one of the strategies on your handout to smoothly embed the quotation into your writing. *Keep in mind, that you will likely need to pare the quote down to its bare essential pieces. Your strongest sentences will often be those in which you weave evidence into your commentary.
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