1. LESSON Two: Know Yourself
Sexuality
LESSON Two: Know Yourself

3. The Sexual parts - Male

5. Question
How can I avoid getting tempted?

6. Answer
Avoiding is the important word. Don’t get in a situation that is obviously going to lead to temptation!
Don’t encourage others – by our dressing or behaviour
Plan activities together with friends.
When temptation comes, redirect your mind and think on the good and positive. Who can you talk to about sexual feelings?

7. Question
I have some weird dreams that I think are due to bad thoughts. What can I do about this?

8. Answer
None of us can actually control what we dream. However, you must guard the ‘avenue of the soul’ – what goes into your mind. Be careful what TV or programs you watch – and the fantasies you allow yourself.
When bad thoughts hit you, read Philippians 4:8 (NIV)
8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable— if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

9. Question
I feel sexually excited by seeing my girlfriend in a swimsuit. Is that wrong?

10. Asnwer
Not in itself. All that proves is that your mental and physical ‘wiring’ is working OK.
What is important, is how you react. If you allow your sexual thoughts to take over and lead you, then you will have problems.
Fire is of great use when handled carefully and properly controlled. Out of control it can become a monster that destroys everything in its path.
Always be in control and not burn with desires.
If not checked can lead to lust = greedy sexual passion for some thing.
Love sees a person, lust just sees an object.

11. Question
My sexual feelings are so strong that I just can’t stand it any more. It’s like I’m going to die unless I get satisfaction. How can I deal with these feelings?

12. Answer
What are your fantasies – do you spend a long time indulging them?
In most cases, overwhelming feelings come because of what has gone into the mind. Stop anything that might be feeding those feelings.
Try to re-direct your mind to more healthy activities. The danger times are when you’re alone, unoccupied, just dreaming. So get back to your studies, or your work, or some absorbing activity or sport.
Ask God to help you in dealing with your thoughts. You won’t die from not having sex!

13. Question
I’m still a virgin, but love pictures of girls in magazines. Is this normal?

14. Answer
Just because of single and a virgin doesn’t mean you don’t experience sexual excitement. But do you realize that this can lead you into other problems like masturbating to erotic pictures or the use of pornography.
You need to ‘guard the windows of the mind’, and make sure you don’t spend time concentrating your thoughts on sexual material that will make things worse.

15. Question
I get lonely and then I find myself tempted with bad thoughts. How can I get rid of them?

16. Answer Not by concentrating on them!
The more you think about bad thoughts, the more they dominate your life. Being lonely is a factor
Having too much time to fantasise is a problem, so you need to develop interests. Spend more time with others; think of how you can get involved in church youth activities, or community work, etc
The only way to ‘get rid of bad thoughts’, Is to crowd them out with good ones. Overcome evil with good; don’t concentrate on evil.

17. Question
I have lots of spots on my face and I get teased a lot. I get pretty miserable and don’t have a girlfriend. Do you have any advice on how to get one?

18. Asnwer Physical attractiveness is not the most important thing.
Most girls get more interested in a guy who is friendly, considerate, helpful, kind and caring.
The teasing probably comes from sympathy than you think.
Go to your doctor or pharmacist and don’t be put off
Show your inner self – and make good friends who don’t put you down.

19. Why are some men and women less sensual than others?

20. Answer The libido or sex drive, varies from person to person.
In a loving relationship there is a meeting of minds and bodies. So if one is more or less sensual than the other, then in love they take that into account and readjust their behavior accordingly. Their physical desires of both partners eventually settle down to some kind of norm.

21. Question When should I start dating?
What is the difference between friendship and dating?

22. Answer There is no definite rule about what age is right.
Much depends on the maturity of the person, sense of responsibility, and the setting, culture.
Start with mixed group relationships
Discuss with an adult – parents or someone responsible
Be sure not to be pressurized by people around you.
Don’t be worried if you are not dating when others are.
The best relationships come from finding friends in a natural and unforced way.
Find out more about a person by the way they relate to other people – so a group is a good idea!

23. Question
Why do I feel the way I do? Sometimes I’m just so hyped up, and other times I don’t seem to feel anything?

24. Answer
You should be aware of body cycles. Sometimes before and during a period you can feel irritable or sad. This is often called premenstrual tension or PMT. If severe, then go see your doctor.
Other chemical and hormonal changes also occur that can affect your emotional state.

25. Question
Does the size of the breasts matter?

26. Answer Breast size has nothing to do with sexual enjoyment.
We would not suggest surgery to increase breast size, as this may even make your breasts less responsive.
There is no evidence that creams supposed to improve your bust size actually work!
So be happy as you are!
Remember smaller breasts may be better for breast-feeding infants than larger ones.

27. Question
If females know that men are turned on by what they see, why do they wear ski pants? Isn’t that encouraging them to sin? This happens even in the church.

28. Answer
Men has a responsibility – to keep their lustful thoughts under better control.
But girls have a responsibility too – especially when they understand the male sexual mind.

29. Question
How do people who have been sexually active before joining the Church control their sexual desire?

30. Answer
If your body has already become used to certain forms of stimulation, it will take some effort to stop.
Ask God to cure the damage of sin in your life in the sexual area as well as everywhere else.
Work around the temptations.
Avoid circumstances and situations that might lead to sex.