1. May 31, 2016 Entry task: What is engagement?
Target: Identify engagement and warning signs.

2. Marriage Preparation the Foundation of Marriage!
Engagement

3. Seven Predictors of a successful relationship
Dating for at least one year
Financial stability
Personal stability
Parental approval
Similar attitudes about birth control and children
Similar life goals, religious, and ethnic backgrounds
Ability to communicate

4. Engaged to Be….
....married, of course! It goes without saying that engagement is a statement of intention to marry, but there are other, perhaps less obvious, functions of engagement as well???

5. Engagement ??? Establish Yourselves as a Couple Spend Time Together
Get to Know Each Other Better
Observer Each Other in a Variety of Situations
Discover Similarities and Differences
Seek Counsel or Advice
Arrange for a place to live
Plan the Wedding
Reconsider the Marriage if Necessary

6. Are you Ready for Commitment?
Do You Know Yourself?
Expectations
Idiosyncrasies
Values
Goals
What Do You Have in Common?
Beliefs
Dreams
Interests
Activities
Do You Know Your Loved One?
Life Plans
Priorities
Attitudes
Habits

7. What might Happen to a couple who cannot make this adjustment?
Seeing Double As a single person, you think with your own individual point of view. As a Married Person, you must adjust to being part of a couple. You must think in terms of “we” not just “I”. The challenge is to learn to see things as a couple while maintaining your own individuality at the same time.
I want We want
I will We will
I need We need
I wish We wish
I should We should
I Expect We expect
I plan We plan +
You I = US
What might Happen to a couple who cannot make this adjustment?

8. Engagement Warning Signs
A successful engagement is one that either confirms the wish to marry or the fact that marriage would be a mistake. While breaking an engagement is not easy, it is far better than entering a lifetime commitment with serious doubts.

9. WARNING This marriage may be Hazardous to your Happiness!
Too much Dependency on one person
Great Differences in Values, Goals, Expectations
Lack of Family Approval and Support
Excesses – Drug, Alcohol, etc.
Abusive Behavior
Brief Acquaintance
Frequent Quarrels or Fights
Guilt or Pressure Motivations to Marry
Personal History of Frequent Changes (Jobs, Friends, Etc)
Under Eighteen or Shows signs of Immaturity

10. How much do weddings cost?
$26,951 (*The Knot: $29,800)
Honeymoon?
$3,600
Engagement ring?
$4,630

11. Average Cost…
Wedding dress: $1,124

12. Average Cost
Cake: $591

13. Average Cost
Rings: $6113 bride (includes bride's ring and band) and $468 (for the groom)

14. Average Cost
Photographer: $2,307

15. Average Cost
Flowers: $1,971

16. Average Cost
DJ: $782

17. Average Cost
Reception: $13,106

18. Average Cost
Venue: $1,993

19. Average Cost
Invitations: $368

20. Average Cost
Catering: $59 per guest X 150 = $8,850

21. Average Cost
Center pieces: DIY - $273 Hired - $988

22. Average Cost
Wedding bouquet: $108

23. Average Cost
Tuxedo: $141

24. Average Cost
Wedding favors: $281

25. Average Cost
Bridal party gifts: “Something between $75 and $125 should suffice”
6 bridesmaids
6 groomsmen
12x$75=$900

26. Average Cost Hair and makeup: $150
Do you want your bridesmaids and mother?
6 bridesmaids, mother and bride X $150 =$900

27. Average Cost
Rehearsal dinner (typically paid for by the grooms family): $1,100

28. Average Cost
Grooms cake: $200

29. Average Cost
Prenuptial agreement: $780

30. So, who pays for this anyway?
Traditionally
Brides family pays for ceremony and reception and brunch
Grooms family pay for rehearsal dinner
Now
Bride and groom pay for the event 33% of the time.