1. Searching, Dating, & Break-Ups
Relationship Part 2

2. Where your are Weak and where you are Strong
Know Who You Are
Where your are Weak and where you are Strong

3. Myth #5: Beauty will Fade—Don’t be shallow.

4. Searching Physical Attraction
Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth!
For your love is better than wine;
your anointing oils are fragrant;

5. Myth #6: I can change them.

6. Searching Character your name is oil poured out;
therefore virgins love you.
Draw me after you; let us run.

7. Character Does His or Her name proceed them?
Do they have a servant’s heart?
Are they a person of equal faith?
How do they handle conflict?
How do they respond to authority?
Would I be proud to bring them home?
Can I see this person being a good parent to our children?

8. Myth #7: I can change them.

9. What are your non-negotiables?
But Daniel resolved that he would not defile himself with the king's food, or with the wine that he drank. Therefore he asked the chief of the eunuchs to allow him not to defile himself.

10. Dating
A Progression

11. Myth #8: As a woman I must wait to be pursued

12. Myth #9: I don’t deserve to be pursued.

13. Draw me after you; let us run. Ah, you are beautiful, my love;
your eyes are doves.
Ah, you are beautiful, my beloved,
truly lovely.

14. It takes intentionality
Dating
It takes intentionality
Meeting
Time in community
Isolated Time in community
DTR

15. Myth #10: I deserve to know everything about you-now.

16. Vulnerability Casual Personal Intimate
I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem,
do not stir up or awaken love
until it is ready!

17. Necessary Conversations
Intent of Dating—why are you being intentional
Present Vision for Life
Vision for Relational Roles
The Role of Faith
Present Values
How Family Has Shaped You

18. Myth #11: I can change them.

19. Next Step? Has this person earned my trust?
Am I willing to fight for this person no matter the brokenness? Are they willing to do the same?
Does our relationship propel us closer towards God?
Does this person challenge me in my faith?
Do I find myself more and more compelled by this person?

20. When it is time to end it They do not respect you.
They manipulate you.
They are not honest with you.
Together your relationship moves you away from God.
They do not challenge you
You do not share the same life goals or values
They are inconstant in other relationships
Your Friends and Family Advise Against It.
You lost the spark.

21. Myth #12: I don’t want to hurt them.

22. How to End It Be Direct, Honest, and Clear
Try to be pro-active towards not blindsiding them.
Do not Negotiate—Stand Firm if Necessary
Listen with Grace
Create Space for Mourning—Plan when and how you will leave.
You will hurt them. And it will hurt you. But that’s no reason to stay in a relationship that will damage you more later.

23. If You Are Broken Up With
Listen with Grace
Share with grace how you feel
Let them go.
Do not let the rejection define you.
Spend time with close friends

24. After A Break Up Evaluate continually in community
Pray for the other person.
Forgive the other person.
What did I learn about myself?
What did I learn about others?
What would I do different next time?

25. Can you still be friends?
Depends how it ends
Recommend at least 6 weeks of 0 contact.
Reintroduce slowly in community