1. Chapter 6: The Fourth Commandment – Honor Your Father and Your Mother
OUR MORAL LIFE IN CHRIST

2. 1. The Family as a Community of Love (pp. 164–166)
ANTICIPATORY SET Discuss the opening story about Mike and his brother Jack: ❏ Is Mike right to blame himself for his brother coming home drunk? ❏ Given the response of Mike’s conscience to his brother’s behavior, what steps should Mike take?

3. 1. The Family as a Community of Love (pp. 164–166)
BASIC QUESTIONS ❏ What is the best place to raise children well? ❏ Who are husband and wife most obligated to love? ❏ What is the child’s obligation to his or her parents? ❏ What is the relationship between the family and good citizenship? KEY IDEAS ❏ A person’s upbringing and moral and physical support find their ideal setting in the family. ❏ By reason of marriage, a husband and wife must show their greatest and most intense love for each other. ❏ As a direct consequence of their parent’s love for them, children must honor, obey, respect, and love their mother and father as representatives of God. ❏ A healthy family environment ultimately contributes good citizens to society.

4. 1. The Family as a Community of Love (pp. 164–166)
FOCUS QUESTIONS ❏ How does the family serve society? It contributes good citizens to it. ❏ What does the following statement mean: “A person’s upbringing and moral and physical support find their ideal setting in the family”? It means that a person’s family—his or her father and mother and siblings—is the best place in which to grow up well. ❏ What does it mean to say the Fourth Commandment takes “pride of place” among the Commandments referring to the person? The first three Commandments refer to God, while the next seven relate to our neighbor. The First Commandment relating to our neighbor is the Fourth, demanding we honor our father and mother, so it is first, or has “pride of place,” among the Commandments relating to our neighbor.

5. 1. The Family as a Community of Love (pp. 164–166)
❏ What is the hierarchy of love between husband and wife? The first duty of love that the husband and wife have is toward each other. The second duty of love is toward their children. ❏ What does a child owe his or her parents, and why? Because a person’s existence, in cooperation with God’s creative power, is a direct consequence of his or her parents’ love, children must honor, obey, respect, and love their mother and father as representatives of God.

6. 1. The Family as a Community of Love (pp. 164–166)
GUIDED EXERCISE A class discussion: ❏ Given how badly some fathers and mothers have raised their children, why cannot single persons, or other combinations of parents, like blended families or same‑sex couples, do just as well in raising children?

7. 1. The Family as a Community of Love (pp. 164–166)
FOCUS QUESTIONS ❏ Why does each family member need a strong relationship with Jesus Christ in order for the family to be an oasis of happiness and charity? Because of the effects of Original Sin, we need both Christ’s example to guide us and his grace to imitate him. ❏ What are some of the qualities of Christ that parents and children should imitate? His affection, kindness, and spirit of service are imitable. ❏ What is the extent of a person’s duty toward authority according to the Fourth Commandment? The person’s obligation to authority extends from parents to the extended family to elders and ancestors to teachers, employers, leaders, and our civil governors.

8. 2. Parental Duties (pp. 167–169)
BASIC QUESTIONS ❏ What does the Fourth Commandment promise children who honor their parents? ❏ Why are children forever in their parents’ debt? ❏ How should one’s children be treated? KEY IDEAS ❏ The Fourth Commandment promises blessings on children who honor their parents throughout their entire lives. ❏ No matter how grateful, children can never repay their parents for the gift of life and upbringing. ❏ Each child is a child of God redeemed by Jesus Christ and must be treated by parents as such.

9. 2. Parental Duties (pp. 167–169)
FOCUS QUESTIONS ❏ How is the Fourth Commandment a two‑way street between children and parents? Parents have a duty of care toward their children, and children have a duty of obedience toward their parents. ❏ What are the three principal aspects of Christian parenting? They are fairness / understanding, discipline, and instruction in the Faith. ❏ What is the message of the phrase, “Do not provoke your children to anger”? Parents must try to earn and maintain the respect of their children. ❏ What does God promise those who obey the Fourth Commandment? He promises many blessings.

10. 2. Parental Duties (pp. 167–169)
❏ What is the idea behind children truly loving their parents? It is gratitude: children can never repay their parents for the gift of life and for their upbringing. ❏ According to Sirach, what is the origin of the hierarchy within the family, in which children are “below” their parents? God is its origin. “The Lord honored the father above the children, and he confirmed the right of the mother over her sons.” ❏ What is the relationship between good discipline and love? Parents who love their children discipline them.

11. 2. Parental Duties (pp. 167–169)
❏ What can parents instill in their children through discipline?
Good use of freedom, self‑control, and a sense of responsibility can be instilled.
❏ How does discipline look to the person who successfully receives it?
It is recognized as a good thing because it makes one righteous.

12. 2. Parental Duties (pp. 167–169)
GUIDED EXERCISE A class discussion on the biblical proverb, “Spare the rod and spoil the child” (cf. Prv 13:24). ❏ Is this true, in your experience? ❏ What is the problem with parents who just want to be “friends” with their children?

13. 2. Parental Duties (pp. 167–169)
FOCUS QUESTIONS ❏ What vices can result from lack of parental discipline? Insensitivity to the needs of others, habitual laziness and idleness, and an inability to fulfill reasonable tasks can result. ❏ Why do parents not have absolute authority over their children? Although children are entrusted to the care of their parents, they belong to God and deserve to be treated as his children. ❏ What is the limit to parents’ authority over their children regarding living the Faith? Parents may not force a particular vocation on their children, for example, over whether to become a priest or to marry.

14. 3. Filial Duties and Spousal Unity (pp. 170–171)
BASIC QUESTIONS ❏ Why are children to obey their parents? ❏ What is the importance of the good example of parents? ❏ What is the demand of charity toward members of the extended family? ❏ How does marital fidelity affect children’s respect for authority? KEY IDEAS ❏ According to the Fourth Commandment, children are obligated to obey their parents, regardless of whether their father and mother are good role models. ❏ Parents effectively direct and guide their children not only by verbal command, but also by their good example. ❏ Families also have the duty to love members of the extended family. ❏ Marital fidelity cultivates and facilitates in one’s children respect and obedience toward God, the parents, and all other authority.

15. 3. Filial Duties and Spousal Unity (pp. 170–171)
FOCUS QUESTIONS ❏ What is filial piety? It is respect for one’s parents; as taken from Confucius. He taught that love of parents, siblings, ancestors, then civil authorities makes society sound. ❏ Where does respect for parents originate? It comes from the gratitude of a child for all his or her parents have given him or her.

16. 3. Filial Duties and Spousal Unity (pp. 170–171)
FOCUS QUESTIONS ❏ Why should students obey their teachers? The students’ parents have entrusted their children to the teachers; therefore, teachers share in the parents’ authority. ❏ When does a child not have to obey a parent? When a child is convinced in conscience that it would be morally wrong to obey a particular instruction or command, the child should not obey. ❏ Why should children obey a parent who has character flaws? The authority of a parent comes from God, not from the parent’s degree of moral perfection. ❏ How should children treat their parents, even if they grow old and senile? Children should help their parents and never cause them grief or despise them.

17. 3. Filial Duties and Spousal Unity (pp. 170–171)
GUIDED EXERCISE ❏ Why should we make an effort to keep in touch with extended family members who live far away? ❏ What are some ways we can do this?

18. 3. Filial Duties and Spousal Unity (pp. 170–171)
CLOSURE Write a paragraph arguing that good parental example promotes but is not necessary for children’s obedience.

19. 4. Citizens and Government (pp. 171–173)
BASIC QUESTIONS ❏ Why should we obey authority? ❏ What is the relationship between the fundamental rights of the person and public authority? ❏ What is the principle of subsidiarity? KEY IDEAS ❏ It is the will of God that Christians obey those in rightful authority, their representatives, and the laws of the state. ❏ Public authority is obliged to respect the fundamental rights of the human person, as well as to guarantee the conditions that make the exercise of these rights possible. ❏ Subsidiarity is the principle that should guide relations in society. A lower authority must not be interfered with by a higher authority without necessity. When a higher authority does intervene, it should be for the legitimate common good.

20. 4. Citizens and Government (pp. 171–173)
FOCUS QUESTIONS ❏ What is the purpose of authority? Authority exists to serve the individual and the common good. ❏ Why is it legitimate for authority to possess power? Authority has power so that it can serve the individual and the common good. ❏ What does it mean to say that public authority is obliged to respect the fundamental rights of the human person as well as to guarantee the conditions that make the exercise of these rights possible? It means that public authority must protect human rights. Extension: For example, one of the fundamental rights of the person is the right to life. A public authority should not pass laws that take the life of an innocent person, nor permit others to threaten the lives of innocent persons.

21. 4. Citizens and Government (pp. 171–173)
FOCUS QUESTION ❏ What is the principle of subsidiarity? The principle of subsidiarity maintains that a higher authority must not interfere with a lower authority without necessity. i.e. government involvement with families… Extension: A higher authority “should support [the lower authority] in case of need and help to co-ordinate its activity with the activities of the rest of society, always with a view to the common good” (CCC 1883).

22. 4. Citizens and Government (pp. 171–173)
CLOSURE Write a paragraph summarizing the government’s obligation to its citizens.

23. 4. Citizens and Government (pp. 171–173)
ALTERNATIVE ASSESSMENT Write a paragraph on how Luke 12:42–48 and Romans 13:1–5 reveal the respective duties of individuals to public authority and public authority to individuals.

24. Luke 12:
Then Peter said, “Lord, is this parable meant for us or for everyone?” 42And the Lord replied, “Who, then, is the faithful and prudent steward whom the master will put in charge of his servants to distribute [the] food allowance at the proper time?
43Blessed is that servant whom his master on arrival finds doing so. 44Truly, I say to you, he will put him in charge of all his property.45But if that servant says to himself, ‘My master is delayed in coming,’* and begins to beat the menservants and the maidservants, to eat and drink and get drunk,46
then that servant’s master will come on an unexpected day and at an unknown hour and will punish him severely and assign him a place with the unfaithful.47That servant who knew his master’s will but did not make preparations nor act in accord with his will shall be beaten severely;48and the servant who was ignorant of his master’s will but acted in a way deserving of a severe beating shall be beaten only lightly. Much will be required of the person entrusted with much, and still more will be demanded of the person entrusted with more.

25. The End