1. Publishing English Lesson 7
USTC School of Management
Spring 2018
Teacher: Dr. Murray Sherk
Course Website:
(Click on the “Publishing English” link.)

2. Final Exam: Monday, May 14 Exam time: Exam place:
Morning? 9:00am-11:00am?
Afternoon? 1:30-3:30pm?
Exam place:
To be determined but will have internet access
Exam Preview will be in class Wednesday, May 9 (usual time and place)

3. Lesson 7 Outline Review of Lesson 6 PE7: Avoid cultural bias
Personal pronouns in academic writing
British English vs. American English
PE8 & BCG7:
Sentence structure and ideas
Resumptive, summative, and free modifiers
PE9&10: Transitions and conjunctions
Example: Text analysis and correction

4. Review of Lesson 6 Research Proposals (and similar documents)
Presentation of Dr. Wayne Brodland
Student discussion: Lit Review, References
Reference-Keeping Systems
Demo of EndNote & an important “fix”
Which one? EndNote, Mendeley, Zotero …
Try one out!
More Principles for Good Writing

5. Advice from a Canadian Prof.
PowerPoint about research proposals
What does science look like?
“Paint a hole”
Literature Review

6. Literature Review Explains the current state-of-the-art
Makes the reader an “expert” on the background relevant to your project
Relates your project to what is known
Describes the hole with precision
Makes it clear why your goals address the hole
Might discuss philosophy – i.e., big picture
Explain why your proposed work is important
Describe the exact boundaries of current relevant knowledge

7. Review of Lesson 6 More Principles for Good Writing
Research Proposals (and similar documents)
Presentation of Dr. Wayne Brodland
Student discussion: Lit Review, References
Reference-Keeping Systems
Demo of EndNote & an important “fix”
Which one? EndNote, Mendeley, Zotero …
Try one out!
More Principles for Good Writing

8. With a partner, discuss the following article
What can you learn from this?
It is about Research Proposal writing, but what points apply to Journal Papers too?
What are the most important points for you to pay attention to?

9. Review of Lesson 6 More Principles for Good Writing
Research Proposals (and similar documents)
Presentation of Dr. Wayne Brodland
Student discussion: Lit Review, References
Reference-Keeping Systems
Demo of EndNote & an important “fix”
Which one? EndNote, Mendeley, Zotero …
Try one out!
More Principles for Good Writing

10. Murray’s Demo of EndNote
“Fix” of EndNote problem:
If an author’s name is listed different ways in different entries of your EndNote database…
…then EndNote thinks it’s not the same person!
“M. Sherk” / “Murray Sherk” / “Murray W. Sherk” / “M. W. Sherk” / “M.W. Sherk”
APA first author rule 
Make sure each author has just one name!

11. Review of Lesson 6 More Principles for Good Writing
Research Proposals (and similar documents)
Presentation of Dr. Wayne Brodland
Student discussion: Lit Review, References
Reference-Keeping Systems
Demo of EndNote & an important “fix”
Which one? EndNote, Mendeley, Zotero …
Try one out!
More Principles for Good Writing

12. Discuss this article Author likes Mendeley
Author likes Mendeley
Emphasizes that reference-keeping systems should help you read systematically and conveniently…
…and help you integrate that reading into papers!

13. Review of Lesson 6 More Principles for Good Writing
Research Proposals (and similar documents)
Presentation of Dr. Wayne Brodland
Student discussion: Lit Review, References
Reference-Keeping Systems
Demo of EndNote & an important “fix”
Which one? EndNote, Mendeley, Zotero …
Try one out!
More Principles for Good Writing

14. Try out a reference keeper
EndNote helps you find get entries for papers
E.g. from Web of Science
Mendeley indexes papers you give it and puts them in cloud for easy reading on multiple devices
EndNote offers more options to customize journal name short forms, citation styles, …

15. Review of Lesson 6 More Principles for Good Writing
Research Proposals (and similar documents)
Presentation of Dr. Wayne Brodland
Student discussion: Lit Review, References
Reference-Keeping Systems
Demo of EndNote & an important “fix”
Which one? EndNote, Mendeley, Zotero …
Try one out!
More Principles for Good Writing

16. Cultural Bias
Always remember you are writing for an international audience.
They are NOT like you and they do NOT know “what everybody knows”.
Chinese: “After Liberation…”
Canadian: “Hockey” = “ice hockey”
Any: “The government…”
Any: “Foreigners often…”
“As we all know, …” (NEVER say this!)

17. Discuss this now with your partner.
In your culture…
What does “everybody know”?
What assumptions can you make about people in your home culture which you CANNOT make about your international audience?
In Lesson 7:
Discuss this now with your partner.

18. Lesson 7 Outline Review of Lesson 6 PE7: Avoid cultural bias
Personal pronouns in academic writing
British English vs. American English
PE8 & BCG7:
Sentence structure and ideas
Resumptive, summative, and free modifiers
PE9&10: Transitions and conjunctions
Example: Text analysis and correction

19. [PE7] Look for cultural bias and subjective terms like “foreign” or “our government”.
Are you assuming your readers know the “obvious” things that are known by “everyone” in your own culture?
These are like beholder words but, even worse, may be meaningless or insulting to readers:
“During the reform and opening, …”
“After Liberation, …”
“It is obvious that proximity to India gives Pakistan <something>.”

20. Lesson 7 Outline Review of Lesson 6 PE7: Avoid cultural bias
Personal pronouns in academic writing
British English vs. American English
PE8 & BCG7:
Sentence structure and ideas
Resumptive, summative, and free modifiers
PE9&10: Transitions and conjunctions
Example: Text analysis and correction

21. Personal Pronouns: I, my, me, we, our, us
Read “PhD consultancy” article posted on course website
Another reference article from University of North Carolina – Chapel Hill (USA) is also on the website but is mostly about other research areas.

22. Personal Pronouns: I, my, me, we, our, us
Another reference article from University of North Carolina – Chapel Hill (USA) is also on the website but is mostly about other research areas.
“Sciences: Because the primary purpose is to study data and fixed principles in an objective way, personal experience is less likely to have a place in this kind of writing. Often, as in a lab report, your goal is to describe observations in such a way that a reader could duplicate the experiment, so the less extra information, the better. Of course, if you’re working in the social sciences, case studies—accounts of the personal experiences of other people—are a crucial part of your scholarship.”

23. “We” = authors or “Authors & reader”?
In an analysis or proof, it is fine to use ‘we’ to mean the reader and the writers together.
‘Next, we substitute Eq. (2) into Eq. (5) to get the following.’
‘We can see in Figure 4 that…’
‘The rapidly decreasing profit in this situation tells us that…’.
Using ‘we’ in this sense is often good because it lets you use active voice sentences more easily.

24. Lesson 7 Outline Review of Lesson 6 PE7: Avoid cultural bias
Personal pronouns in academic writing
British English vs. American English
PE8 & BCG7:
Sentence structure and ideas
Resumptive, summative, and free modifiers
PE9&10: Transitions and conjunctions
Example: Text analysis and correction

25. Did you notice the single quotemarks in the personal pronoun document?
In an analysis or proof, it is fine to use ‘we’ to mean the reader and the writers together. ‘Next, we substitute Eq. (2) into Eq. (5) to get the following.’
That’s British English style.
Look at “British vs. American style” document on website.

26. Main differences: British vs. American
“..ise” vs.“..ize” for verbs like “analyze”
“..our” vs. “..or” in words like “color”, “neighbor”
“centre” vs. “center”
Quotation marks:
Brit. ‘ then “. E.g. ‘He said “no”.’
Amer. “ then ‘ E.g. “He said ‘no’.”
Americans tend to put sentence period inside quotations. E.g. He is an “outlier.”
British style uses logical grouping: He is an “outlier”.

27. Lesson 7 Outline Review of Lesson 6 PE7: Avoid cultural bias
Personal pronouns in academic writing
British English vs. American English
PE8 & BCG7:
Sentence structure and ideas
Resumptive, summative, and free modifiers
PE9&10: Transitions and conjunctions
Example: Text analysis and correction

28. Principle PE8: Sensibility and Value
To check for logic in a sentence, express the main idea of [parts of] the sentence in a few words.
Is it clear what the sentence focuses on?
Does the main idea actually make sense?
Is the idea so obvious that it does not need to be stated?
Are you being wimpy? (Do you fear disagreement?)
“Some researchers believe that this may be a possible factor.” BAD!!!
Express an opinion! Be bold! Be interesting!
Are the ideas logically connected?
Is the argument circular? (Check your definitions.)

29. Overly simple structure (SVO, SVO, …) is weak writing – Longer sentences sound more “scholarly” and are more concise
John owns a car.
The car is a two-door model.
The car was made in Germany.
Mary is John’s wife.
Mary hates John’s car.
How can we combine these simple sentences into one longer, more elegant sentence?

30. Combine simple SVOs using modifiers
From “A modifier changes, clarifies, qualifies, or limits a particular word in a sentence in order to add emphasis, explanation, or detail. Modifiers tend to be descriptive words, such as adjectives and adverbs. Modifier phrases, such as adjective clauses and adverbial phrases, also exist and tend to describe adjectives and adverbs.”

31. Beware of misplaced modifiers!
“Burton was driving around the countryside while his friend sang songs slowly.”
The modifier is not close enough to the word that it modifies, making its meaning unclear or incorrect.
Because of its placement, we would presume that the adverb slowly is modifying sang.
To modify driving, place slowly directly before or after the verb it’s modifying to eliminate confusion:
“Burton was slowly driving around the countryside while his friend sang songs.”
Or “Burton was driving slowly around the countryside while his friend sang songs.”
(See:

32. Beware of misplaced modifiers!
“The rusted woman’s bicycle made a horrible screeching noise.”
Completely incorrect!
rusted is modifying woman instead of bicycle.
The sentence should read:
“The woman’s rusted bicycle made a horrible screeching noise.”

33. Resumptive Modifiers
John owns a car.
The car is a two-door model.
The car was made in Germany.
Mary is John’s wife.
Mary hates John’s car.
John and Mary often argue about the car.

34. Summative Modifiers
John owns a car.
The car is a two-door model.
The car was made in Germany.
Mary is John’s wife.
Mary hates John’s car.
John and Mary often argue about the car.

35. Free Modifiers https://www.thoughtco.com/free-modifier-grammar-1690807
John owns a car.
The car is a two-door model.
The car was made in Germany.
Mary is John’s wife.
Mary hates John’s car.
John and Mary often argue about the car.

36. Lesson 7 Outline Review of Lesson 6 PE7: Avoid cultural bias
Personal pronouns in academic writing
British English vs. American English
PE8 & BCG7:
Sentence structure and ideas
Resumptive, summative, and free modifiers
PE9&10: Transitions and conjunctions
Example: Text analysis and correction

37. PE9: Transitions and Conjunctions
Transitions between sentences and conjunctions between clauses: Good ideas but…
Know subtleties of meaning!
Many imply a difference or similarity with what went before.
“whereas”, “nevertheless”, “although”, “because”, “so”
Be careful with “as”: it means both “when” and “because”.
“As I went to the store, I got warm.”
Do not overuse transitions; Many sentences do not need a transition at the start!

38. PE10: And, But, So, = common conjunctions to connect ideas
Used to connect clauses within sentences.
Beware of starting sentences with “And”, “But”, or “So”. [That is newspaper technique.]
(Once or twice in an entire article is OK for “shocking” connections. Think of hitting the table.)
To start sentences, “Thus,” (= “so”) is fine and “However,” (= “but”) is good but do not overuse these
Recall: Not every sentence needs to start with a transition!
For variety, put “however” further in the sentence: “The next step, however, can introduce larger errors.”

39. PE10: And, But, So,
Beware of starting sentences with “And”, “But”, or “So”.
When you are tempted to use “And” to start a sentence, you can use…
“Moreover,” or “In addition,”
or just combine the sentences:
“…enjoy sports. And they also…”
becomes
“…enjoy sports and they also…”.

40. PE10: And, But, So, Avoid run-on sentences;
Common conjunctions that connect ideas.
Used to connect clauses within sentences.
Beware of starting sentences with “And”, “But”, or “So”. [That is newspaper technique.]
Avoid run-on sentences;
Do not use so many conjunctions in a sentence that the main thrust of the sentence is obscured.

41. Lesson 7 Outline Review of Lesson 6 PE7: Avoid cultural bias
Personal pronouns in academic writing
British English vs. American English
PE8 & BCG7:
Sentence structure and ideas
Resumptive, summative, and free modifiers
PE9&10: Transitions and conjunctions
Example: Text analysis and correction

42. Fix research paper intro: Stage 1
“Since China’s reform and opening up, China’s annual economic growth rate reached more than 9%, but at the same time, the amount of many environmental pollutants, such as SO2, CO2, in China increase. Because of the environmental problems, some mass disturbances occurred in China, such as…”
Discuss text with partner as you find problems
On both of your sheets, circle/underline all the problems you find. (2 sheets should be identical)

43. Fix research paper intro: Stage 2
“Since China’s reform and opening up, China’s annual economic growth rate reached …”
Trade one of your pair’s sheets for another pair’s
Consider the other pair’s indications of problems
What did they find that you missed?
Do you agree that there are problems there?
What did they miss that you found?
Merge the indications so all problems marked on both sheets.

44. Fix research paper intro: Stage 3
Get document from link on course website
I’ve noted some of the problems with underlining
Write your own better version, using Word’s “Track changes” feature.

45. Fix research paper intro: Stage 4
With your partner, discuss your corrected versions.
Where you corrected a problem differently, which way is better? Why?
Were any of the problems in the text also problems that you often make in your own writing?

46. Homework Write a 10-item checklist specifically for your writing.
These should reflect the 10 most common and most important weaknesses in your writing!
Consider this course’s Principles for Good Writing (on website) but some of your 10 items may not be listed there.
Express each item as words (1-2 sentences) and be specific.
Use imperative sentences (commands to yourself) such as “Look for… and change them to…”.
this checklist to Murray before the exam.
You may consider doing this homework as one week’s writing project work, but your list will also be graded and count in your homework mark.