1. Communication & Listening Skills Presented by: Julie Lawton

2. Shape Quiz
Chose the shape below that you think most fits your personality?
The quiz can be found here:
Ask attendees to write down which shape that they think instinctively represents their personality. Depending on size of group, they can write it on a white board, or, in their own personal notebook.
If possible, engage the audience throughout this section. For staff meetings – they usually get a kick out of identify themselves and their co-workers in each of the shapes! The more involved they are in the discussion, the better it goes!

3. Details, Data & Systems Hardest workers; task oriented Loyal
Structured; organized
Think sequentially, logically
May be stubborn with opinions based on their data
Value details and data; analytical
Know policies & rules
Not fond of change, prefer a stable environment
Prefer working alone to teamwork
May see fun as unnecessary or a luxury
Trouble saying “I’ve got enough information”
Conservative, regular, orderly

4. Details, Data & Systems
Meeting behavior:  well prepared, lots of notes, gets right down to work
Motto: “Give me a job and a deadline and I’ll get it done”
If you are a square it might help help you to:
Be less picky with people
Create your own routines
Allow yourself to make a few mistakes so you don’t limit your opportunities
Learn to make decisions with less data
Try taking more risks and acting spontaneously
For others to work best with you, they should :
Be specific
Provide clear expectations
Create a regular routine

5. Results People Bottom line; focused on goals
Driven to succeed; motivated by results
Take charge and move fast
Big picture – Don’t need all the research or details
Need to know WHY
Confident
Competitive
Outspoken – Love to debate and argue
No nonsense
Decisive; cut to the chase; move on
Impatient
Likes recognition – may put stock in status symbols

6. Results People
Meeting behavior:  Hate meetings. Get to the bottom line and move on
Motto:  “So what’s your point???”
If you are a triangle, to improve you might try to:
Slow down and don’t shoot from the hip
Attend to necessary details, even if you delegate them
Develop more interest in the opinions of others
Give people more room to come on board
Be aware of your impact on others
For others to work best with you, they should:
Present the goal and the big picture
Explain the WHY
Provide stretch milestones and targets
Be succinct
Provide support for the details

7. People People Empathy and perception for others Fun-loving; laugh
Listen and communicate well
Easily swayed by opinions of others
Caregivers/helpers
Like people, committees, teams
Peacemakers – avoid conflict or making unpopular decisions
Over commit; take on more than you can handle
Too nice; can’t say no
Better at caring for others than yourself
Don’t particularly like hierarchy

8. People People Meeting behavior: Social, create harmony, love the food
Motto:  “I’ll do it – somebody has to!”
If you are a circle, to improve you might want to:
Learn how to say NO and mean it
Worry less about what other people do and think
Hold others accountable
Learn how to make unpopular decisions when necessary
For others to work best with you they should:
Be flexible
Be willing to talk about whatever is at hand
Provide a harmonious environment
Provide opportunities for you to add your perspective

9. Idea People Often visionaries –lots of ideas Creative
Lots of energy and enthusiasm
Like to try new ways and different things
Can appear a little flaky because their mind moves so fast
Difficulty with completion; start a task and move on to the next great idea
Can be frustrating to work with
Easily bored
Flexible – spontaneous
Make cognitive leaps, from A straight to F
Prefer less structured environments

10. Idea People Meeting behavior: Already thinking of the next step
Motto:  “I just got this great idea!”
If you are a squiggle, to improve you could:
Slow down and pay attention to the details
Focus on the task at hand
Think before you speak and act
Pay attention to your impact on others
For others to work best with you, they need to:
Present you new and different things to do
Be flexible and avoid preconceived ideas
Provide an unstructured environment
Offer multiple choices
Provide help with follow through

11. Purpose Self Understanding & Better Communication
YOU need to orient toward the style of others that you work with
Example:
A square will want details
A triangle will not appreciate indecisiveness
A circle needs to connect and have conversation
A squiggle will need to have distractions removed

12. Results
Research shows that self-awareness leads to better self-management
Enjoy the different strengths you each bring to the table
When working through a process make sure you include all four behavior styles
new ideas
concern for people
data and analysis
results
At conclusion, ask people to now write down which shape they actually identify with (it can be a combination of more than one.) Great time for discussion – is it different than their first instinct. Why or why not?

13. Today’s Objectives
Work on exercises together that will focus on Listening and Communication
Back to Basics
Shake off Old Habits
Share our expertise and learn about our teammates
Opportunity to take a personal inventory

14. Right/Left Brain
(If you only have an hour, this section could be skipped!)
Moving on with Personalities:
Write on white board or flip chart – draw a line down middle and label the Right side RIGHT and the left side LEFT:
Ask Who knows which activities are housed in the right side of the brain – Creative, Intuitive, Art, Music, Emotional, Non- Rational etc… As they call out, list them. Now what about the LEFT? Again list – math, logical, verbal, science, rational, etc… Post the Flip Chart or White Board

15. Right Brain Creative Intuitive Art Music Emotional Non-Rational
Some of us are very good at accessing the right side of our brain; in fact some of us are very right brained. Others, especially left brained people need a little help accessing that creative side of our brain. Many times, creativity needs to be uncovered because as adults we do not often use it.
Ask the GROUP:
Q: At What age do we lose the vast majority of our creativity?
A: Age 7
Q: Why?
A: When you start school – structure is indoctrinated; age of reason
Q: Anyone know what % of creativity is lost by age 7?
A: 90%
Provide example: School is structured, you have to follow the rules, not allowed to shout out or explore on your own. Suzanne shares a story about her niece that asked to be homeschooled at a young age – when her Mom asked why – the answer was: My friend is homeschooled and at school if I have an idea that I want to work on, I can’t because I have to move on with the class…

16. Left Brain
Math
Logical
Verbal
Science
Rational

17. What Does Listening Mean?
Page 2 Workbook
Switching Gears to Listening skills:
In page 2 of the workbook – write down your thoughts on what listening means.
Take the Listening Style Inventory: Give them a couple of minutes to complete. Let them self score. Discuss

18. Listening Style Inventory
Active
Involved
Passive
Detached
Take the Listening Style Inventory: Give them a couple of minutes to complete. Let them self score. Discuss

19. Interesting Article
Read super boring article in a boring tone: For example:
Ask a couple of questions about the article:
For example: What was the name of the Report? What award years were compared in the report? Etc… give a small award if someone can answer. (like a pen or earbuds!)
Ask Why Did you read this to them:
People/Customers are not going to say “THIS is important to me!” – How many times do you miss important information by not being a good listener?
Sometimes what people are saying may not seem important to you – BUT it may be important to them, and may ultimately become important to you.
Let’s talk about what listening means…. Ask for some things that they wrote down in their books – write them down on flip chart
(I skipped this in shorter presentation)

20. Dimensions of Listening
Staying Focused: Keeping your full attention centered on the speaker
Mentally prepare to listen
Create an environment conducive to listening
Remove visual noise
What is your “clutter factor?”
Approach listening as an opportunity to learn
Capturing the Message: Understanding the speaker’s message completely and accurately
Take strategic notes
Practice asking different types of questions
Create comprehensive check-points
Paraphrase key points to stay on “same page”
 Helping the Speaker: Involves paying attention as well as giving supportive feedback
Overcome the urge to interrupt (deep breaths!)
Eliminate distractions
Sound – respect others in the office, as they are taking calls too!
More on Listening – this section can get boring – could be a good area to cut out a few slides as needed. If you are providing the workbook – much of this information is provided there, so, you can also skip through this section quickly – noting that they have the workbook for future reference.
What is your clutter factor for phone or in person:
Stories are always good: Can be true in face to face meetings as well: I conducted this presentation at a school in the room that they typically use for their staff meetings. On one wall there is a painting of ducks. One of the staff members said that she intentionally sits on the side of the table with her back to the painting of the ducks – because they distract her during meetings – oh look – cute ducks!
Engage the crowd for thoughts

21. Listening as a Communication Skill
Did you know that listening is our primary communication activity? (page 4 Workbook)
Studies show that we spend about 80% of our waking hours communicating. At least 45% of that time is spent listening.
In schools, students spend 60% - 70% of their classroom time engaged in listening.
In business, listening has often been cited as the most critical success skill.
Page 4 in Workbook for more details

22. Benefits of Listening What happens when we listen? People like us
People trust us
We accomplish more
We reduce the margin for error
The interchange stays on track

23. Benefits of Listening What happens when we don’t listen?
We appear insensitive
We waste time
We make inaccurate assumptions
We alienate our clients

24. Types of Listeners
In a business environment, there are four types of listening styles:
Comprehensive – Listen for main ideas or key points
55% of people
Factual – Listen for just the facts
20% of people
Empathetic – Listen for emotions
23% of people
Critical – Listen for desired outcomes
3-5% of people
Ask people to self identify themselves and also think about why types of listeners that their colleagues and customers tend to be. Modify approach based on this information.

25. Barriers to Listening How many of the following are you guilty of?
Talking too much
Give the speaker/caller an opportunity to explain his / her situation.
 Composing your next statement while the other person is talking
This creates mistakes such as interrupting before the person is finished, seeming argumentative or defensive and jumping to conclusions. How can you understand what the speaker/caller wants if you are mentally designing your next statement?
 Perceiving why the other person is reaching out (via telephone or ) or bringing up a topic in conversation before getting all the details
We sometimes “believe” we know what the person wants. This can result in you trying to fit the information into your own preconceived idea!
Having an expectation of where the conversation is going
If you have an expectation of where the conversation is going, and in fact it is a different situation, you may “shut down” the listening skills and miss opportunities to identify what the person needs.

26. Good Listening Habits Limit your own talking
You cannot talk and listen at the same time.
Think like the speaker
The customer’s information, problems and needs are important and you will understand and retain them better if you keep in mind his / her point of view.
Ask questions
If you need more information, ask for it!
Don’t interrupt
A pause does not always mean the speaker is finished saying everything
Concentrate
Focus your mind on what is being said. Practice shutting out distractions.
Listen for ideas not just words
You want to get the whole picture, not just bits and pieces.

27. Good Listening Habits Turn off your own worries Prepare in advance
Use interjections
An occasional “yes”, “I see”, etc. encourages and shows the customer you are still following.
Turn off your own worries
Not always easy; personal fears, worries and problems form a static that can block the speaker/caller’s message.
Prepare in advance
Remarks and questions prepared in advance can free your mind for listening.
React to ideas, not the person
Don’t allow irritation at things being said, or the manner in which they are said to distract you.
Don’t argue mentally
You may disagree with what the customer is saying but keep an open mind while listening, or you may unconsciously “close your ears!”

28. An effective listener understands.
Remember
A good listener hears;
An effective listener understands.

29. Let’s Think Questions?! House Exercise
Switching gears to utilizing effective questions to get the answers you need!
Time for the HOUSE EXERCISE!
This is fun – people like it!
Have attendees break down into groups of two
If possible have the two people sit back to back
Make sure one person has paper and a pen/pencil
The object of the game is for one person to draw the house his/her partner will be given
Those drawing can ask any question they want for as many as 5 minutes (may need to make it 3 depending on your time)
Follow instructions on sheet
Be careful to use both house papers and hand them out in a way that people in other groups can’t see the pictures – the logistics can be tricky!

30. Open-Ended vs. Closed Questions
Open-ended questions are used to:
Determine problems
Understand requests
Establish needs
OPEN:
Who?
What?
Where?
When?
Why?
How?
Closed questions are used to:
Probe for specific information
Say yes or no
Choose from alternatives that you supply
CLOSED:
Did? Will?
Shall? Is?
Can?
Do?
Has?
Relate this back to the House Exercise

31. Maximizing the Effectiveness of Questions
Four reasons to ask questions:
To develop your presentation or dialogue
To get information, not just give information
To clarify or reinforce an idea or customer statement
To get to know the individual customer you are talking to
Four guidelines for asking questions:
Ask broad questions first, and then move to narrow ones
Ask short, simple and focused questions
Ask questions that are easy to answer
After asking your question, be quiet, and really listen to the answer
What we have learned…

32. Face to Face Communication
Body Language ___________________%
Tone ___________________%
Words ___________________%
Ask audience what they think? (Page 14 in workbook)
Body Language: 55%
Tone: 38%
Words: 7%

33. Telephone Communication
Tone ___________________%
Words ___________________%
What about over the phone – audience thoughts?
Tone: 87%
Words: 13%

34. Voice Voice Characteristics Voice: Color Voice: Rate Voice: Content
Rate Content
Voice: Color
 Tone and Pitch
Accents
Strength
Voice: Rate
Speed at which a person speaks
Is your rate fast or slow
Voice: Content
Vocabulary
Jargon
Fillers
Tone and pitch can literally change the meaning of what you are saying!
Ask a few members of the audience to say:
“Step Into My Office” using any, but different from the others… you can see how the tone changes the actual meaning of the words.
The words that you chose to emphasize can change the meaning of what you are saying:
Example: I was BORN in Boston” – I am telling you – what – I am NOT a newcomer.
Vs.
I was born IN Boston – I am simply telling you that is where I as born.

35. Exercise
Super Fun!
Have people break down in pairs again – have each one read the GA to the other while the other times them.
Have them write down times on flip chart or board or paper depending on your logistics and audience size
Ask if anyone remembers the other name for the Gettysburg Address
--It was called the famous 2 Minute speech..
It was 280 words and it took Lincoln approximatley 2 minutes.. Circle the times closest to two minutes
People from the Northeast tend to be fast! People from the south or mid-west are generally slower.

36. Email Communication Courtesy, and Team Rules of the Road
 Watch for perceived tone! No SHOUTING!
Be thoughtful about who is copied
Update Subject Lines to reflect School/Issue etc
Be thoughtful of how s are forwarded
Provide brief recaps
Observe the “3” exchange rule
Change Communication Method
We have talked about in person verbal communication and over the phone verbal communication...what about ...let’s quickly discuss some Business Development rules of the road on page 17
Ask audience if they have protocol to follow:
For instance – the “3” exchange rule – if an issue isn’t resolved in 3 exchanges – pick up the phone!

37. Using the Right Words
This is in the workbook – generally they can do this on their own… we are out of time!

38. Choose Your Words Carefully
Rewrite the following sentences to be reflective of a positive message.
Instead of: “I can’t send this until Monday.”
Say:
______________________________________________________________________
Instead of: “I’ll try to accomplish this.”
Instead of: “I’ll have to check with my manager.”
Instead of: “I’ll be honest with you...”

39. Choose Your Words Carefully
Instead of: “I’m really not sure.”
Say:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Instead of: “Can I interrupt for a minute?”
Instead of: “they just won’t do it.”
Instead of: “If I can find out.”
Instead of: “I’d hate to give the wrong information.”
Instead of: “I’m new to this process and I don’t know all the answers.”

40. Final Exercise
If you are doing a LONG training – you could end with an interactive exercise. Generally this slide could be removed.

41. Thank You!
“If we were supposed to talk more than listen, we would have been given two mouths and one ear.”
Mark Twain