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Describe yourself using five adjectives.
Write a couple of sentences describing your personality.
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Interpersonal Communication and the Self
Self-Concept: Your subjective description of who you think you are. How do you describe yourself to others? What are your attitudes, values, and beliefs? Self- Esteem: An evaluation of who you think you are. Your “self-worth”
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How Self-Concept Develops
(3 of 5 listed) Looking-glass self (Charles Horton-Cooley, 1902). Interactions with others greatly inform our self-concept. Depending on the following: a. Repetition b. Credibility of the communicator c. Consistent with our own experience d. Self-Labels: The power to self label, shapes our self-concept (aka known as “avowal”) e. Self-reflexiveness- We talk to ourselves about ourselves. We often evaluate ourselves and are critical of the feedback others have given us. f. Your Personality- your individual personality characteristics
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Big 5 Personality Traits
Extraversion Agreeableness Conscientiousness Neuroticism Openness
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Our Many Selves William James Different ways to define ourselves:
Material Self: Tangible things you own: your body, your possessions Social Self: We potentially have many social selves: friend, family member, significant other, colleague, etc. Spiritual Self: infinite, or finite? An amalgam 0f your religious beliefs and your sense of who you are in relationship to other forces in the universe.
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Self- Esteem Your “self-worth”- An evaluation of who you are.
We often preserve our self esteem by facework: We use communication to maintain our positive perceptions of who we are. Preventative facework: saving face before the fact. “If I get a bad grade on the test, it will be because I’m working a lot of hours next week.” Corrective facework: saving face after the fact. “I’m sorry I was late, I got a ticket.”
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What are methods that you use to boost your self esteem? Do they work?
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Improving your Self-Esteem
Engage in self-talk Visualize a positive image of yourself Avoid comparisons Reframe appropriately (one criticism doesn’t mean you are an awful person) Develop honest relationships Let go of the past Seek support/counseling
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For homework, research the abundant list of tips on- line
For homework, research the abundant list of tips on- line. Compile a list of the most promising ideas. Identify 5 tips that you’ll present to the class.
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Self-Disclosure Purposefully providing significant information to others about ourselves that they wouldn’t have learned if we didn’t tell them. Depending on the information disclosed, a degree of vulnerability is the result. Self Disclosure conveys a level of trust and acceptance of another person. (Meyer and Rothenburg, 2005)
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Levels of information Cliches (Phatic Communication)
Fact/Bio info (Non-threatening) Opinions and attitudes (General likes/dislikes) Personal Feelings (Deep level feelings) Peak- Gut level (Secrets)
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Take a few minutes and write down a few items for each level.
Think of two different people, or groups with whom you communicate regularly. Does your list change? Why?
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The Johari Window: Developed by American psychologists
Joseph Luft and Harry Ingham in the 1950's, calling it “Johari” after combining their first names, Joe and Harry A simple and useful tool for understanding and training self-awareness, personal development, improving communications, interpersonal relationships, group dynamics, and team development.
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Draw your own Johari Window diagram for two different people, or groups.
Identify five opinions/attitudes that you have that reside in the “Open Quadrant.” (People know this about you and you are aware of these too.) Identify five opinions/attitudes that reside in the “Hidden Quadrant.” (Only known by you) Which opinions/attitudes to you tend to keep from this person/group? Why? Is there anything that you have discovered from a person’s/group’s feedback that would have been in the “Blind Quadrant” years/months ago, but are now in the “Open/Known by self Quadrant?” What was the context of the conversation? Is there anything that you and the other person/group have discovered that used to reside in the “Unknown Quadrant?” How did you discover this?
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Primary Aim For homework, write your first draft of your Primary Aim.
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Partner up and compare and contrast your diagrams.
What can we potentially learn about ourselves from the Johari window?
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