1. Family Support/ Recovery
Barbara Woods, LCSW, ACSW

2. Diagnosing an Alcohol Use Disorder
A few mild symptoms — which you might not see as trouble signs — can signal the start of a drinking problem. If heavy drinking continues, over time, the number and severity of symptoms can grow and add up to an "alcohol use disorder." Doctors diagnose an alcohol use disorder when a patient's drinking causes distress or harm

3. Behavioral Symptoms Alcohol Dependence
Drink more or longer than intended
Tries to modify drinking habits more than once, but cannot
Spends a lot of time drinking or hungover
Wants a drink so badly that can not concentrate on anything else
Drinking and being hungover has interfered with responsibilities to family, job, and home
Continues to drink even though it causes trouble with family and friends
Give up important and enjoyable activities in order to drink
Get into situations after drinking, such as driving or walking in a high-crime neighborhood, which increases chances of injury
Continue to drink even though feeling depressed, anxious, and/or blackout
Needs to drink more than before to get the same effect
Feels withdrawal symptoms, such as nausea and sweating

4. ADDICTION –FAMILY DISEASE
NCADD (National Council on Alcohol and Drug Dependency) states that Addiction is a family disease that stresses the family to the breaking point…..impacts the family unit, mental and physical health…..”Living with Addiction creates a feeling of insanity”.
Over time family becomes more and more dysfunctional to adapt. Dysfunction becomes the “new normal”.

5. CONTAGIOUS
INSANITY IS “CATCHING! The stress of living with an alcoholic produces dysfunctional coping behavior similar to that of post traumatic stress syndrome

6. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS CHAPTER 9: The Family Afterward
“Years of living with an alcoholic is almost sure to make any wife or child neurotic. The entire family is, to some extent, ill.”
Page 122
1939

7. HEALTHY FAMILY NURTURING FLEXIBLE RULES
SELF-WORTH VALIDATED THROUGH OTHERS
CHANGE IS ENCOURAGED
OPEN HONEST COMMUNICATION

8. UNHEALTHY FAMILY ISOLATION RIGID RULES
SELF-WORTH VALIDATED THROUGH THE ALCOHOLIC
STATUS QUO IS PROTECTED
LITTLE OR NO COMMUNICATION

9. CODEPENDENCY
A CODEPENDENT PERSON IS ONE WHO HAS LET ANOTHER PERSON’S BEHAVIOR AFFECT HIM OR HER, AND WHO IS OBSESSED WITH CONTROLLING THAT PERSON’S BEHAVOR.

10. CODEPDENCY
A psychological and behavioral condition that develops as a result of the individual’s prolonged exposure to, and practice of, a set of oppressive rules which prevent the open expression of feelings as well as the direct discussion of personal and interpersonal problems Robert Subby, M.A.

11. CODEPENDENCY The central feature of codependency is “an unhealthy
dependence on relationships, usually in an attempt to
avoid feelings of abandonment”.

12. The Healing Process for Families
Education – Books, Lectures, Internet
Explore Intervention
Attend Family Treatment Program
Get Professional Help – EAP/ Therapist
Attend a Mutual Support Group

13. MUTUAL SUPPORT GROUPS AL-ANON FAMILY/PARENTS ANONYMOUS
ADULT CHILDREN OF ALCOHOLICS
ADULT CHILDREN OF ALCOHOLS AND OTHER DYSFUNCTIONAL FAMILIES
ALATEEN

14. Family Treatment/Support is critical
Treatment setting offers safety and security
Shame anger, guilt, fear reduction
Education about disease of addiction
Families are left “to deal” without support
Minimal or no change in family dysfunction with no treatment or support .
Addiction education is healing for the family

15. Family Treatment Programs
Varies among facilities
Weekly visits in person if feasible
Telephonic sessions
Weekend extended programs
2-3-5 day programs

16. Family Treatment Education on the Disease Boundaries Self Care
“Let’s Talk”—Couples/family therapy in safe environment
Open up lines of healthy communication
You are not alone—establish a support group

17. What to Expect Post Discharge?
The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous mentions that a “personality change” must occur to bring about recovery from alcoholism. This includes a vast change in feelings and outlook, and a profound alteration in an individual’s reaction to life.

18. Honey I’m Home More time at home vs flying
New commitments and responsibilities
New Priorities??
Personality Change…Who are you?
Different reaction to stress

19. With Family Treatment Positive Personality Changes
Alanon and other self help group attendance
No drugs/alcohol in the home
Improved communication/healthy boundaries
Stronger family unit-”We are in this Together”
Family members participate in self care

20. No Family Treatment Difficulty adjusting to the “new” normal
No support group—no education on disease
Resentment/distrust of increased absence from home—meetings, HIMS, aftercare, etc.
Less $$
You are the problem and I’m suffering

21. Relapse
Returning home to dysfunction= relapse

22. Family Texts
I got the book. I’m so sad. I’m seeing a counselor ASAP. I want him healthy. The book made me see my role in this and that hurts. But what I also see is not many if any stay together when this is the dynamic of the relationship.

23. Family Texts
We had some wonderful times and memories hence the reason I never gave up on the relationship. Seems I need to now. If I’m contributing to his drinking, then I need to leave him alone. The thought of this being the end of us and the chances of ever being together again is intolerable. I’m hurting so much. I don’t want to “not” have him in my life.

24. Family Texts It’s Really hard tonight!
I feel like I’m having a heart attack. I know I’m not. It just hurts a lot.

25. Family Texts
I’m off work today. Thought I would be ok. But I’m choking down tears.

26. Family Texts
His family needs me. They are like my own children. To think I might not be in his life and theirs after 18 years is just not reasonable.
I’m trying to read and go to alanon to understand this process but I’m not really understanding it.

27. Resources Melodie Beattie: Co-Dependency & Beyond Codependency
The New Codependency
CoDependent No More
Love is Not Enough, Dr.James Dobson
It Will Never Happen to Me, Claudia Black