1. Parenting kids with substance abuse
Kevin Petersen MA, lMFT
Petersen family counseling, 1660 s. albion st., Denver, co 80222

2. Introduction: why listen to me?
Kevin Petersen MA, LMFT
Regis University MA MFT 2011, CAC Cert 2013
USC, BA Economics
Petersen Family Counseling LLC 2014
Family Recovery Program 2015
ADMHN , Child and Family Services, The Bridge House, IST
RFY 2010 Adolescent Treatment Center

3. Recovery Sober since May 1991 Alanon since December 2009
ACA since May 2017

4. Who I am talking about
I look for the kids that are tearing up the family, not the kid that’s experimenting
Look for a change in social circles, grades, friends, dating patterns
Life is getting out of control; trouble at school, with the law, with the family, trouble at work. 
Alcohol, drugs, food, gambling, porn, they all count as addictions
What has the family already tried; doctors, therapists, ministers, school counselors, etc

5. What’s the plan? Keep It simple, sweetie!
Plan A
Boundaries, Accountability and Structure
Remember that boundaries are about you, not your kid
There has to be a method of accountability
Structure is the rewards and consequences of following or not following the plan

6. Plan A: Boundaries, Accountability and Structure
Drugs and alcohol
Boundary is no drugs or alcohol
Accountability is weekly and random drug testing, hair follicle tests and breathalyzers
Structure is if you pass the tests, you get the phone, car, internet, social life, free time, if you fail the tests then you don’t

7. Plan A: Boundaries, Accountability and Structure
School or work
Boundary is 3.0 or better, no missing assignments
Accountability is weekly reports from each teacher at school
Structure is if 3.0 is achieved and no missing assignments, then privileges are restored, if not then no privileges

8. Plan a: boundaries, accountability and structure
Behavior at home
Boundary is no disrespectful behavior, language or violence, and chores are done on time
Accountability is a weekly meeting or family therapy where this is all reviewed
Structure is if goals are achieved then privileges are restored, if not then no privileges

9. Plan b: treatment  
Treatment 
30/60/90 day inpatient treatment centers are available in state and out of state, in network and out of network. 
Intensive Outpatient treatment centers are available in state and out of state, in network and out of network. 
Therapeutic boarding schools are available and DPS is opening 5280 HIgh School in 2018. 
Picking a treatment program is like buying a car, there are a ton of choices and the pricing is negotiable.

10. Plan b: Treatment 
You are not doing them any favors by tolerating or ignoring their behavior. 
Allowing them to live in your house and still using and thinking that its safer is insane; they are killing themselves in your basement.
You are not qualified to run an in home RTC, PHP, IOP or Sober Living, let the professionals handle it!
Most treatment centers will have a list of interventionists and sober transport that they have worked with successfully

11. My kid is in treatment, now what?
Continue with weekly or bi-weekly family therapy; just because your child is in treatment does not mean everything is groovy!
Attend the family events at the treatment center and regular phone therapy
Engage in your own recovery community of people dealing with the same issues
Start preparing for your child’s return home or to a therapeutic school, don’t wait until the last week of treatment