1. Interpersonal Relationships
How do we make friends?

2. What are three things you look for in a friend?
Friends
What are three things you look for in a friend?
Right these down at the beginning of your notes!

3. Why do we need friends?
During infancy we depend on others to satisfy our basic needs.
We associate close personal contact with the satisfaction of basic needs.

4. Anxiety and Friends It seems that we need company most when…
we are afraid or anxious.
we are unsure of ourselves and want to compare our feelings with other people’s

5. The Seven Ways We Choose Friends

6. We have already discussed 3 Ways…
Physical Proximity (Live close to your friend)
Mere Exposure (More we are around someone)
Physical Attractiveness (Friends look similar)

7. 1. Rewards
A friend has stimulation value if he or she is interesting or imaginative or can introduce you to new ideas or experiences.
A friend who is cooperative and helpful– who seems willing to give his or her time and resources to help you achieve your goals–has utility value.
A third type of value in friendship is ego-support value: sympathy and encouragement when things go badly, appreciation and approval when things go well.

8. 2. Approval
Some studies suggest that other people’s evaluations of oneself are more meaningful when they are a mixture of praise and criticism than when they are extreme in either direction.
As a result, one can take more seriously a person who sees some good points and some bad points.

9. 3. Similarity
People tend to choose friends whose backgrounds, attitudes, and interests are similar to their own.
Reminder: Skip 0:38-0:41 with bad word Mr. Bodine!

10. 4. Complementarity
Despite the power of similarity, an attraction between opposite types of people– complementarity–is not unusual.
Still, most psychologists agree that similarity is a much more important factor.

11. Triangular Theory of Love

12. Examples for Different Types of Love
Romantic Love= Lovers without commitment
Fatuous Love=Shallow relationship, no time for each other
Infatuation= Love at first sight
Empty Love= Love each other without intimacy or passion
Liking=True Friendship
Companionate Love= Long-term marriage where passion has faded.