1. Activity 1.8: Revising the beginning
7th grade springboard

2. Learning targets
I can analyze the effectiveness of narrative openings.
#2-3, 5
I can revise opening paragraphs to enhance effectiveness. #4

3. Writing and revision
Read this quotation about revision: “If a teacher told me to revise, I thought that meant my writing was a broken-down car that needed to go to the repair shop. I felt insulted. I didn’t realize the teacher was saying, ‘Make it shine. It’s worth it.’ Now I see revision as a beautiful word of hope. It’s a new vision of something. It mean you don’t have to be perfect the first time. What a relief!”
With your table group, summarize what Naomi Shihab Nye means about revision. What does this quote make you think about writing and revision?

4. In the Beginning
2. Many writers struggle with how to begin their writing with an interesting lead. A lead, or hook, comes at the beginning. Its purpose is to encourage your reader to keep reading. Review these types of leads, or hooks. Mark (underline) the important words in the definitions of the “Type of Lead” column. Use metacognitive markers in the examples.

5. In the Beginning
3. Revisit the openings from texts you have read in this unit to examine how published authors hook readers with effective leads. Bad Boy pg. 22 Staying Fat for Sarah Byrnes pg. 15 “Why Couldn’t I Have Been Named Ashley?” pg. 33

6. Revision of narrative lead
4. Review your narrative draft and revise your opening using one or more of the lead techniques: action, reaction, dialogue. Your goal is to open with a strong lead that engages readers, encouraging them to continue reading your personal narrative.
5. Effective writers also reflect upon the changes they make in order too become more aware of specific techniques they use during the writing process. Describe how you have changed your opening. How did you change make your opening more engaging for the reader (revision reflection).
Kind of Lead:
Changes I Made/Why Not:
Revision Reflection: