1. University of Northern IA
Presentation prepared by:
Marilyn Shaw
University of Northern IA
This multimedia product and its contents are protected under copyright law. The following are prohibited by law:
Any public performance or display, including transmission of any image over a network;
Preparation of any derivative work, including extraction, in whole or in part, of any images;
Any rental, lease, or lending of the program.
Copyright © 2014, 2011, 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

2. Chapter 14 Developing and Maintaining Relationships: From Formation to Dissolution
Copyright © 2014, 2011, 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

3. Interpersonal Communication Competence
Five skills leading to interpersonal competence are:
The ability to adapt and know how to communicate in specific situations.
The ability to adapt and appropriately communicate in specific interactions.
The ability to understand your and the other person’s values, beliefs, attitudes, or feelings.
The ability to self-monitor.
The ability to be fair and ethical.
Photo from chapter 10, 2
Copyright © 2014, 2011, 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

4. Relationship Formation
Interpersonal Attraction—the desire to interact with someone.
Physical Attributes
Observations from first impressions
Stereotypes and appearance
Communication and Attraction
Fear of rejection by those who are more attractive
Similarity in attraction
Chemistry or Physical Attraction
Physical attraction is important
Chemistry (attraction at first sight)
Meeting online
Women are more likely to form online relationships
The depth and personal aspects of the relationship add to the possibility of moving beyond the computer
Copyright © 2014, 2011, 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

5. Knapp & Vangelisti: Stages of Coming Together and Coming Apart
Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2008

6. Relationships: Initiation or Coming Together
Initiating : meet and interact for the first time
Experimenting : discover common ground
Intensifying : increase self-disclosure
Integrating : establish deep commitment
Bonding : announce commitment publicly
Copyright © 2014, 2011, 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

7. Relationships: Coming Apart
Terminating : end the relationship
Avoiding : create distance
Stagnating : avoid communication
Circumscribing : reduce communication
Differentiating : focus on differences
Copyright © 2014, 2011, 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

8. Relationship Maintenance Strategies
Positivity
Openness
Assurances
Blending Social Networks
Sharing Tasks
© Yuri Arcurs/Fotolia

9. Relationship Dissolution
Signs That Relationships Are in Trouble
Aggressive behavior
Aiming to hurt the other party
Lies
Deceives another by not telling the truth
Betrayal
Extramarital affairs, gossip, and harmful criticism
Deception and betrayal are similar. The difference is that betrayal violates a confidence and an agreed on expectation.
Copyright © 2014, 2011, 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

10. Relational Repair Strategies
Open/honest communication
Bring out/focus on positive side
Evaluate rewards/costs
Seek support
Reinterpret other’s behavior
Reduce negativity

11. Duck’s Phases of Dissolution
The Intrapsychic Phase
Internally assess their classification of their relationship
The Dyadic Phase
Discuss the status of their relationship
The Social Phase
Relationship difficulties become more public within the context of family, friends, coworkers, etc.
The Grave-Dressing Phase
Final phase because after the breakup, each partner gives an account of why the relationship ended.
Copyright © 2014, 2011, 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

12. Interpersonal Conflict
According to Wilmot and Hocker, conflict is an expressed struggle between at least two interdependent parties who perceive incompatible goals, scarce resources, and interference from others in achieving their goals.
Faulty communication can lead to conflict.
Faulty attribution errors can lead to conflict.
Faulty perceptions and a tendency to perceive our own views as objective and reflective of reality, but others as not based in reality, can lead to conflict.
Personality traits or characteristics can lead to conflict.
Copyright © 2014, 2011, 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

13. Both Sides of Conflict Destructive Beneficial Winner vs. loser
Too aggressive behaviors, withdrawal, withholding feelings
Prevents work or feeling good about ourselves
Forces us to do things we do not want to do
Outcome more important than the relationship
Form of bullying
Bring out problems that need solving
Bring people together to clarify goals and explore new ideas
Eliminate resentments and help in understanding
Bring out creativity
Produce acceptable solutions
Pay attention to other points of view
Bring new life into a relationship
Copyright © 2014, 2011, 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

14. Managing Relational Tensions
Denial- denying the problem exists.
Selection- accommodating one party.
Segmentation- choosing certain areas to be open for discussion.
Reframing- redefining tension in order to make it less obvious; make it disappear.
Moderation- compromising; deals are struck in order to reduce tension.
Reaffirmation- accepting that tension will always be present and embracing it.

15. Strategies for Conflict Management or Resolution in Relationships
Withdrawing: lose/lose
Accommodating: win/lose
Forcing: win/lose
Negotiating: lose/lose
Collaboration: win/win
Copyright © 2014, 2011, 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

16. Improving Communication Competence
Address issues clearly
Treat others with respect
Know that praise will most likely produce desired responses
Competent Communicators
Copyright © 2014, 2011, 2008 Pearson Education, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

17. Videos https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0gGXylVz6KI