1. Working with families who don’t say please and thank you
Vincent Docherty

2. Conflict is normal

3. What common types of conflict do residential homes face?
From residents
From commissioners
From regulators
From staff
From families…….

4. Key Steps
Adjust your mindset
Clarify
Define
Mediate
Resolve

5. Understand and Listen
Linked to clarifying

6. Show that you care
Don’t defend the indefensible! Don’t sell yourself short either
Modern domestic abuse, modern slavery and self neglect new categories from previous Pan London.

7. Focus on solutions
If you feel that you know what will make your family happy, tell them how you'd like to correct the situation.
You could say, "I know you want us to find your loved one’s clothes. I will call our other colleagues to see if they are in other residents rooms, and, if they are, I'll drop them into your loved one’s room no later than 5:00pm this evening."
If you're not sure you know what your family wants from you, or if they resist your proposed solution, then give them the power to resolve things. Ask them to identify what will make her happy.
For instance, you could say, "If my solution doesn't work for you, I'd love to hear what will make you happy. If it's in my power I'll get it done, and if it's not possible, we can work on another solution together."

8. Difficult families don’t have to be difficult

9. Emotional Awareness

10. Emotional Literacy Controlled emotional involvement
Purposeful use of emotions
Acceptance
Non judgemental approach

11. 6 principles underpinning conflict management
Partnership
Good communication – emotional awareness
Prevention
Proportionality
Empowerment
Accountability

12. Expert in end of life care
St Christopher’s provides and promotes skilled and
compassionate end of life care of the highest quality,
working with, and through, our communities.
stchristophers.org.uk
St Christopher’s is registered charity number