1. Mar. 2018
Project: IEEE P Working Group for Wireless Personal Area Networks (WPANs)
Submission Title: [Draft PAR & CSD Comment Responses]
Date Submitted: [7 March, 2018]
Source: [Joerg ROBERT] Company [Friedrich-Alexander University Erlangen-Nuernberg]
Address [Am Wolfsmantel 33, Erlangen, Germany]
Voice:[ ], FAX: [ ],
Re: []
Abstract: [Comment resolution to comments on w PAR & CSD after SG w discussions.]
Purpose: [Information to 802 EC]
Notice: This document has been prepared to assist the IEEE P It is offered as a basis for discussion and is not binding on the contributing individual(s) or organization(s). The material in this document is subject to change in form and content after further study. The contributor(s) reserve(s) the right to add, amend or withdraw material contained herein.
Release: The contributor acknowledges and accepts that this contribution becomes the property of IEEE and may be made publicly available by P
Joerg ROBERT, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

2. Draft 802.15.4w PAR & CSD Comment Responses
Mar. 2018
Draft w PAR & CSD Comment Responses
Joerg ROBERT (FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg), chair SG w
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

3. In response to the comments from James Gilb
Mar. 2018
In response to the comments from James Gilb
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

4. Mar. 2018
Comment JG #1: PAR 5.2b
Comment: Add the anticipated range that this new PHY will provide
Text in PAR/CSD:
This amendment defines a Low Power Wide Area Network (LPWAN) extension to the IEEE Std LECIM PHY layer to cover network cell radii of typically km in rural areas.
Remarks / Answers to the Comments:
Accept: Added text to anticipate the range of typical LPWAN networks.
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

5. Comment JG #2: PAR 5.2b cont’d
Mar. 2018
Comment JG #2: PAR 5.2b cont’d
Comment: Delete "as needed“
Text in PAR/CSD:
Modifications to the Medium Access Control (MAC) layer, needed to support this PHY extension, are defined as needed.
Remarks / Answers to the Comments:
Accept: “as needed” is deleted as suggested.
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

6. Comment JG #3: PAR 5.5 Comment:
Mar. 2018
Comment JG #3: PAR 5.5
Comment:
The text says that high link margin is required for interferers, but doesn't put a value on "high". What is high and why don't current PHYs in meet it?
Text in PAR/CSD:
A main functional requirement for LPWANs is achieving improved link margin of typically 155 dB dB to deal with interferers and achieve distances of typically 10 km - 15 km in rural areas using a low transmit power (typically 14 dBm), while maintaining low energy consumption.
Remarks / Answers to the Comments:
Accept: Figures added to PAR document.
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

7. Comment JG #4: PAR 5.5 cont’d
Mar. 2018
Comment JG #4: PAR 5.5 cont’d
Comment: -140 dBm sensitivity implies -174 dBm/Hz + 10 dB SNR and NF gives -164 dBm/Hz, leaving only 24 dB for BW, or 251 Hz. That would likely give < 1 kb/s, which doesn't work for IoT. From where does this -140 dBm come? Text in PAR/CSD: Remarks / Answers to the Comments: Revised: We will insert in 8.1 the following clarification: -140 dBm is the typical sensitivity in current Low Power Wide Area Systems. A bit-rate of 1 kb/s is sufficient for many LPWA IoT applications.
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

8. Comment JG #5: PAR 5.5 cont’d
Mar. 2018
Comment JG #5: PAR 5.5 cont’d
Comment: “The end result is the inability to guarantee the required transmission reliability in such scenarios." Wireless networks can never "guarantee the required transmission reliability" and this project won't change that fact. Text in PAR/CSD: The end result is the inability to guarantee the required transmission reliability in such scenarios. This amendment is needed to close this gap and to provide reliable transmission at receiver sensitivities of -140dBm while delivering multiyear battery life. The end result is the inability to achieve the required transmission reliability in such scenarios. This amendment is needed to close this gap and to provide adequate receiver sensitivities of typically -140 dBm while still delivering multiyear battery life. Remarks / Answers to the Comments: Accept: “Guarantee” and “reliable” are removed and text revised.
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

9. Comment JG #6: PAR 5.5 cont’d
Mar. 2018
Comment JG #6: PAR 5.5 cont’d
Comment: "receiver sensitivities of -140dBm while delivering multiyear battery life." already provides multi-year battery life with the existing PHYs. There does not appear to be anything proposed with the amendment that would improve battery life. In fact, by spreading the information over a longer period of time, the receiver would be on longer, using more power, not less.
Text in PAR/CSD:
Remarks / Answers to the Comments:
Accepted: See comment JG #5 for revised text.
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

10. Mar. 2018
Comment JG #7: CSD 1.2.3
Comment: Quantify "high immunity to interference". Text in PAR/CSD: The proposed project enhances and is limited to the existing LECIM FSK PHY. It uniquely provides a combination of capacities in low data rate, latency tolerant applications not available in any other standard, such as enhanced link margin and long range, while delivering high immunity to interference and still maintaining a multiyear battery life. Remarks / Answers to the Comments: Accept: Text is revised in CSD document.
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

11. Mar. 2018
Comment JG #8: CSD 1.2.5
Comment: None of the reasons given address why this specific, new addition will be similar in cost to existing devices (which vary widely in cost, depending on which version of you implement). Are there LECIM devices fielded? Text in PAR/CSD: This project can be implemented with no hardware changes and therefore change to the existing device cost basis which has been demonstrated, through billions of shipped devices. Remarks / Answers to the Comments: Accept: Text is modified in the CSD document.
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

12. Comment JG #9: CSD 1.2.5 cont’d
Mar. 2018
Comment JG #9: CSD cont’d
Comment: The answer for c) does not address item c), which has to do with installation costs, no manufacturing methods. Text in PAR/CSD: Implementation of this amendment requires no change to current manufacturing methods. This project can be implemented with no hardware changes and therefore to the existing implementation costs which has been demonstrated, through billions of shipped devices. Remarks / Answers to the Comments: Accept: Text is replaced in CSD document.
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

13. In response to the comments from IEEE 802.3
Mar. 2018
In response to the comments from IEEE 802.3
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

14. Mar. 2018
Comment #1: PAR 5.3
Comment: Question is not answered, please do so.
Text in PAR/CSD: Is the completion of this standard dependent upon the completion of another standard: No
Remarks / Answers to the Comments:
Accept: Answer to question is added.
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

15. Mar. 2018
Comment #2: PAR 6.1b
Comment: Not sure who recommended review but if so, the RAC Chair is unaware of a recommendation from the RAC or from editorial staff (typically occurring because of content found in MEC review). RAC review can also be requested by the WG/TG later without a PAR modification if "not anticipated" registry related content appears in the draft. Please refer to the PAR form instructions (copied at end of slide deck) for when a Yes answer is appropriate and consider if the answer should be changed to No. (The RAC has reviewed IEEE Std )
Text in PAR/CSD:
6.1.b. Is the Sponsor aware of possible registration activity related to this project?: YesNo
If yes please explain: There should be none but a RAC review is recommended
Remarks / Answers to the Comments:
Accept: Registration activity is not required. Answer is changed to “no”.
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

16. Mar. 2018
Comment #3: CSD 1.2.5c
Comment: The answer about manufacturing costs is non-responsive to the question about installation costs. Please provide a responsive answer.
Text in PAR/CSD:
This project can be implemented with no hardware changes and therefore change to the existing device cost basis which has been demonstrated, through billions of shipped devices.
Remarks / Answers to the Comments:
Accept: Text is modified in the CSD document. (identical to comment JG #8)
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

17. Comment 802.3 #4: CSD 1.2.5d Comment:
Mar. 2018
Comment #4: CSD 1.2.5d
Comment:
Change IEEE Std to IEEE Std (remove the dot after Std).
Text in PAR/CSD:
There are already devices using IEEE Std in volume shipment operating in the same frequency bands and PHY modes.
Remarks / Answers to the Comments:
Accept: Dot is removed in the revised CSD document.
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

18. In response to the comments from IEEE 802.11
Mar. 2018
In response to the comments from IEEE
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

19. Mar. 2018
Comment #1: PAR 2.1
Comment: Use of “Low Power” should include a range or limit.
Text in PAR/CSD:
Remarks / Answers to the Comments:
Reject: This is the industry nomenclature for this type of networks.
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

20. Comment 802.11 #2: PAR 2.1 cont’d Comment: expand “LEICM”
Mar. 2018
Comment #2: PAR 2.1 cont’d
Comment: expand “LEICM”
Text in PAR/CSD:
Amendment for a Low Power Wide Area Network (LPWAN) extension to the LECIM (low-energy, critical infrastructure monitoring) Physical layer (PHY).
Remarks / Answers to the Comments:
Accept: LECIM is expanded.
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

21. Mar. 2018
Comment #3: PAR 5.2b
Comment: editorial remove extra period “Std.” should be “Std”
Text in PAR/CSD:
This amendment defines a Low Power Wide Area Network (LPWAN) extension to the IEEE Std LECIM PHY layer.
Remarks / Answers to the Comments:
Accept: Text is modified as suggested.
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

22. Mar. 2018
Comment #4: PAR 5.2b cont’d
Comment: correct “<30kBit/s” should “< 30 kb/s”
Text in PAR/CSD:
It uses the LECIM PHY FSK (Frequency Shift Keying) PHY modulation schemes with extensions to lower bit-rates (e.g. payload bit-rate typically < 30 kbBit/s).
Remarks / Answers to the Comments:
Accept: “<30kBit/s” is changed to “< 30 kb/s” and position of PHY is adjusted
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

23. Comment 802.11 #5: PAR 5.2b cont’d Comment: expand “FSK”
Mar. 2018
Comment #5: PAR 5.2b cont’d
Comment: expand “FSK”
Text in PAR/CSD:
It uses the LECIM PHY FSK (Frequency Shift Keying) PHY modulation schemes with extensions to lower bit-rates (e.g. payload bit-rate typically < 30 kbBit/s).
Remarks / Answers to the Comments:
Accept: The term FSK is expanded in the PAR document. The order of FSK and PHY is changed.
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

24. Mar. 2018
Comment #6: PAR 5.2b cont’d
Comment: delete “Furthermore, it defines lower code rates of the FEC in addition to the K=7 R=1/2 convolutional code. Modifications to the Medium Access Control (MAC) layer, needed to support this PHY extension, are defined as needed.” or at least reword to be definitive and define “lower code rates” and the reword to make meaning of “K=7 R=1/2 convolutional code” clear. Text in PAR/CSD: It defines additional lower code rates of the Forward Error Correction (FEC). Modifications to the Medium Access Control (MAC) layer, needed to support this PHY extension, are defined. Remarks / Answers to the Comments: Accept: It defines additional lower code rates of the Forward Error Correction (FEC). Modifications to the Medium Access Control (MAC) layer, needed to support this PHY extension, are defined.
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

25. Mar. 2018
Comment #7: PAR 5.2b
Comment: define the expected range of “Wide Area Network”. i.e. what are you expecting to reach.
Text in PAR/CSD:
This amendment defines a Low Power Wide Area Network (LPWAN) extension to the IEEE Std LECIM PHY layer to cover network cell radii of typically km in rural areas.
Remarks / Answers to the Comments:
Accept: Added text to anticipate the range of typical LPWAN networks. (identical to comment JG #1)
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

26. Mar. 2018
Comment #8: PAR 5.5
Comment: What is “very high link margin” vs “high link margin”? rewording is expected. Text in PAR/CSD: A main functional requirement for LPWANs is achieving improved link margin of typically 155 dB dB to deal with interferers and achieve distances of typically 10 km - 15 km in rural areas using a low transmit power (typically 14 dBm), while maintaining low energy consumption. Remarks / Answers to the Comments: Accept: The word “very” is replaced by improved. Additionally, a commonly accepted link margin range figure (e.g. ETSI, 3GPP) of 155 dB – 160 dB is added. (identical to comment JG #3)
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

27. Mar. 2018
Comment #9: PAR 5.5 cont’d
Comment: Please include definition of the expected range and power that is being included in the specification. Text in PAR/CSD: A main functional requirement for LPWANs is achieving improved link margin of typically 155 dB dB to deal with interferers and achieve distances of typically 10 km - 15 km in rural areas using a low transmit power (typically 14 dBm), while maintaining low energy consumption. Remarks / Answers to the Comments: Accept: The expected range and the power are added to the PAR document. (identical to comment JG #3)
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

28. Comment 802.11 #10: PAR 5.5 cont’d Comment:
Mar. 2018
Comment #10: PAR 5.5 cont’d
Comment:
“guarantee” reword this sentence as you will not be able to “guarantee” in general.
Text in PAR/CSD:
Remarks / Answers to the Comments:
Accept: The word “guarantee” is removed from the PAR. See identical comment JG #5 for revised text.
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

29. Mar. 2018
Comment #12: PAR 5.6
Comment: delete “and similar organtizations” – not necessary (and misspelled). Text in PAR/CSD: Chip Vendors, Product Manufacturers, Wireless Carriers, Utilities, Cities, Agriculture, Infrastructure/Environmental Monitoring Organizations and similar organtizations. Remarks / Answers to the Comments: Accept: Text is deleted from the PAR document.
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg

30. Mar. 2018
Comment #13: PAR 8.1
Comment: Add full name of the cited “IEEE Std h.
Text in PAR/CSD:
IEEE Std ah, Wireless LAN Medium Access Control (MAC) and Physical Layer (PHY) Specifications, Amendment 2: Sub 1 GHz License Exempt Operation
Remarks / Answers to the Comments:
Accept: Added full name as requested to the PAR document in section 8.1.
Joerg Robert, FAU Erlangen-Nuernberg