1. Cell Phone Parenting
Digital Life Night 2018

3. What is the right age to have a cell phone?
The right age to give kids their first cell phone is really up to parents. Age isn't as important a kid's maturity level, ability to follow home (and their schools') rules, and their sense of responsibility.
Here are some questions to consider:
Do your kids show a sense of responsibility, such as letting you know when they leave the house? Do they show up when they say they will?
Do your kids tend to lose things, such as backpacks or homework folders? If so, expect they might lose an (expensive!) phone, too.
Do your kids need to be in touch for safety reasons?
Would having easy access to friends benefit them for social reasons?
Do you think they'll use cell phones responsibly -- for example, not texting during class or disturbing others with their phone conversations?
Can they adhere to limits you set for minutes talked and apps downloaded?
Will they use text, photo, and video functions responsibly and not to embarrass or harass others?

4. What are basic safety rules for cell phones?
Texting
Be respectful, both to the people you're texting with and those around you.
Be careful. Assume that even private texts can become public.
Calling
Verify the caller or texter. Don't respond to numbers you don't know.
Always answer the phone when it's Mom or Dad!
Posting
Be selective, not impulsive. Make sure kids know to be very choosy about what they post from their phones.
Be safe. Explain the risks involved in using location services.

5. Safety rules, continued
Taking pictures
Ask permission before you snap someone's picture, take a video, or forward a photo.
Don't publicly embarrass people. Don't post someone's photo -- especially an unflattering one -- from your phone without his or her permission.
Apps and downloads
Manage costs. Make sure your kids understand that they're spending real money when they download apps, games, and music. Consider giving them an allowance for downloads or password-protecting the download function.
Use parental controls. Depending on the age of your kid, consider using the settings to filter out age-inappropriate content, restrict downloads, and prevent in-app purchases.

6. Is it okay for me to read their texts?
Parents: there's no absolute right answer as to whether it's OK to read your kid's text messages. It depends on your kid's age, personality, and behavior. The most important thing is that you discuss responsible texting behavior. Remind them that any text can be forwarded to an unintended audience -- and texts that involve drugs, sexting, or other illegal things can get kids into real trouble.
You can always simply ask to see their messages. If your kids recoil in horror, ask why they don't want you to see them -- it's very likely that there's nothing bad.
If you have reason to suspect that your kid is going through something dodgy that he or she won't discuss -- and you notice changes in his or her behavior, appearance, and actions -- then you might have probable cause. You also can consider purchasing a text-monitoring service through your wireless carrier.

7. Should I let my kid use apps like WhatsApp, Snapchat, or kik?
All of these apps require users to be 13.
Here are the potential pitfalls to consider before saying yes.
You won't be able to easily check your kids' texts. If you like to periodically check your kids' texts, you won't find them in the texting log. And if you're not a regular user of the messaging apps your kid uses -- or if she's using Snapchat, whose messages disappear -- it'll be tough to find them.
Kids can really waste time on these apps. Because there's no texting max, kids can be on Snapchat, Kik, or WhatsApp all day and night.
They offer a lot more content than texts from friends. Snapchat offers a variety of news, video, and comedy clips from outlets including Vice, CNN, and Cosmopolitan. Kik offers lots of in-app purchases as well as content.

8. What should I do if someone “sexts” my kid?

9. What if my kid’s friend shares an embarrassing photo?
If your kid's friend texted an embarrassing photo to their other friends, it may be a form of cyberbullying.
Talk to the other kid's parents -- and show them the evidence. Explain how your kid felt. Ask why the friend did it. The friend may not have realized it would have the impact it did. As you speak to the friend's parents, don't accuse, but do make sure you're all on the same page about what's appropriate behavior.
Make sure your kid doesn't retaliate, but do make sure they're standing up for themselves and have supportive friends who also will stand up to bullies. Also, consider discussing the matter with your kid's school -- the bully may be acting out due to other problems.

10. Sneaky camera apps you should know about
Apps such as Stealth Cam, Private Ninja Cam, and Top Secret Camera can be used to spy on people. Here are some of the methods they use to deceive the unsuspecting:
blanking the screen so no one knows you're taking a picture;
muting the phone so the shutter doesn't sound;
disguising the preview window so it looks like a Web browser; and
activating the camera to record via motion sensor.
Hidden-photo vaults, such as Calculator%, Keep Safe Private Photo Vault, and Best Secret Folder, are places to keep photos out of view from a prying parent or friend. They share key features, including:
requiring a password for access;
hiding their true purpose (fake calculator apps actually do function as calculators but double as a way to input a secret code and stash secret pictures); and
sounding an alarm or snapping a picture when accessed to catch anyone trying to break in.

11. My kid seems addicted to to their phone. What can I do?
It may seem like your kid is addicted (and may even "feel" addicted) to the phone, but it's more likely normal teen behavior. Teens check their devices frequently and feel pressure to respond to quickly to messages. And their friends tend to take priority over everything else.
In fact, doctors don't agree whether people can become addicted to technology. And if technology addiction exists, it's very rare. Hopefully, you're only dealing with a compulsive habit that you can manage by structuring your kids' time.
Schedule time for the phone to be off, schedule activities during which the cell phone can't be used, and look into programs that block the phone from being used. If you suspect the problem is true addiction, talk to your pediatrician.

12. How can I get my kid to put down their phone?
As annoying as constant texting is, it's a normal part of life for many kids. Staying in touch with friends is important to tweens and teens. When we parents were teens, we talked for hours on the phone! Now the same kind of contact happens through texting.
However, if cell phone use is getting in the way of family time, homework, and other responsibilities, it might be time to help your kid manage his or her phone time.
Help kids find space for face-to-face conversations. Put phones down during key conversation times such as dinner or car rides.
Charge kids' phones in your room at night. Removing their phones can give kids a needed break.
Establish consequences for problematic phone use. If your kids are having trouble putting the phone away when you ask or are engaging in other problematic phone-related behavior, consider instituting temporary time or location limits. Some wireless carriers offer parental controls that let you set daily phone-use limits, and some apps can disable your kid's phone when he or she hits a limit.

13. Putting down the phone, continued
Model the manners and behavior you want to see. Avoid texting in the car. Consider narrating your phone use ("I'm looking up directions to the party") so young kids understand the utility of the device. Make sure to excuse yourself if you have to interrupt a family moment to attend to your phone.

14. Questions?