1. Verbal Communication Chapter topics Language is Symbolic
Understandings and Misunderstandings
The Impact of Language
Gender and Language
Culture and Language

2. Language is Symbolic The Natural World Language is Symbolic
Smoke means something is burning
A fever means someone is ill
Language is Symbolic
Connection between words and the ideas or things they represent is arbitrary

3. Understanding and Misunderstanding
Understanding Words
Semantic rules
“Bikes” are for riding and “books” are for reading
Equivocation
Statements that have more then one commonly accepted definition
Newspaper Headlines:
“Family catches fire just in time.”
“20-year friendship ends at the altar.”
“Trees can break wind.”

4. Understanding and Misunderstanding
Relative Language
Words that gain their meaning by comparison
Do you attend a large or small school?
Fast and slow
Smart and stupid
Short and long
Static Evaluation
Statements that contain or imply the word is lead to mistaken assumptions about people

5. Understandings and Misunderstandings
Abstraction
Is vague in nature
Behavior language is specific to things people do or say
Abstraction Ladder
Abstract language can lead to miscommunication
Figure 5.1 Page 165

6. Understandings and Misunderstandings
Syntactic Rules
Govern the grammar of language
Pragmatic Rules
Govern the way speech works in everyday interaction
Consider the difference between:
I love you
I love ya
I luv U

7. Understandings and Misunderstandings
Pragmatic Rules
What do infer by the following sentences?
“Would you like a drink?”
“Would you like something to drink?”
Pragmatic Rules of
When reading an what do you think when you come across CAPITAL LETTERS!

8. The Impact of Language Naming and Identity
Names are more than just a simple means of identification
They shape the way others think of us
They shape the way we view ourselves
1900’s most popular names
Bertha, Mildred and Ethel
2008’s most popular names
Madison, Ava and Chloe

9. The Impact of Language Affiliation
Speech can build and demonstrate solidarity with others
Convergence
The process of adapting one’s speech style to match others
Divergence
Speaking in a way that emphasizes one’s differences from others

10. The Impact of Language Power Power difference between two statements:
“Excuse me, sir. I hate to say this, but I . . .I . . .I guess I won’t be able to turn in the assignment on time. I had a personal emergency, and . . .well . . .it was just impossible to finish it by today. I’ll have it on your desk Monday, OK?”
“I won’t be able to turn in the assignment on time. I had a personal emergency, and it was impossible to finish by today. I’ll have it on your desk Monday.”

11. The Impact of Language Powerless Language Hedges: Hesitations:
“I’m kinda disappointed . . .” “I think we should . . .” “I guess I’d like to . . .”
Hesitations:
“Uh, can I have a minute of your time?”
“Well, we could try this idea . . .”
“I wish you would—er—try to be on time.”
Tag questions:
“It’s about time we got started, isn’t it?”
“Don’t you think we should give it another try?”

12. The Impact of Language Disruptive Language
Three linguistic habits to avoid
Fact-Opinion Confusion
Fact Opinion
You forgot my birthday. You don’t care about me.
You keep interrupting me. You’re a control freak.
You tell a lot of ethnic jokes. You’re a bigot.

13. The Impact of Language Disruptive Language Fact-interference confusion
A: Why are you mad at me?
B: I’m not mad at you. Why have you been so insecure lately?
A: I’m not insecure. It’s just that you've been so critical.
B: What do you mean, “critical?” I haven’t been critical

14. The Impact of Language Disruptive Language Emotive Language
Seems to describe something but actually announces the speakers attitude toward it
If you approve, say If you disapprove, say
Thrifty Cheap
Traditional Old-fashioned
Extrovert Loudmouth
Cautious Cowardly

15. The Impact of Language Language of Responsibility “It” Statements
Note the difference in each set of sentences:
“It bothers me when you’re late.”
“I’m worried when you’re late.”
“It’s nice to see you.”
“I’m glad to see you.”
“It’s a boring class.”
“I’m bored in the class.”

16. The Impact of Language Language of Responsibility “But” Statements
In each sentence the word but cancels the thought that precedes it:
“You’re really a great person, but I think we should see other people.”
“You’ve done good work for us, but we’re going to have to let you go.”
“This paper has some good ideas, but I’m giving you a D grade because it’s late.”

17. The Impact of Language Language of Responsibility Questions
Some questions are used to avoid making a declaration
“What are we having for dinner?” Could mean, “I want to eat out.”
“How many textbooks are assigned in that class?” Could mean, “I’m afraid to get into a class with too much reading.”

18. The Impact of Language Language of Responsibility
“I” and “You” Language
“I” statements accept responsibility for a message
“You” statements express judgment
“You left this place a mess!”
“You didn’t keep your promise!”
“You’re really crude sometimes!”

19. The Impact of Language Language of Responsibility
“I” and “You” Language
An “I” statement has four elements:
The person’s behavior
Your interpretations
Your feelings
The consequences that the other person’s behavior has for you

20. The Impact of Language Language of Responsibility
“I” and “You” Language
Example:
“I get embarrassed (feeling) when you talk about my bad grades in front of our friends (behavior). I’m afraid they’ll think I’m stupid (interpretation). That’s why I got so worked up last night (consequence).”

21. The Impact of Language Language of Responsibility
Reservations about “I” language
“I get too angry to use ‘I’ language”
“Even with ‘I’ language, the other person gets defensive”
“ ‘I’ language sounds artificial”

22. The Impact of Language Language of Responsibility “We” Language
Implies the issue is the concern of both parties
“We need to figure out a budget that doesn’t bankrupt us.”
“I think we have a problem. We can’t seem to talk about money without fighting.”

23. Gender and Language Content Female friends spent more time discussing:
Relationship problems, family, health
Male friends spent more time discussing:
Current events, music, sports, business
Consider the gender’s impact on language:
“I want to talk about important things, like how we’re getting along. All he wants to do talk about the news or what we’ll do this weekend.”

24. Gender and Language Conversation Style
The myth that women are more talkative than men does not hold up under scientific scrutiny
Men’s speech is characteristically:
More direct, succinct, and task-oriented
Women’s speech is more typically:
indirect, elaborate, and focused on relationships

25. Gender and Language Nongender Variables
The link between gender and language isn’t as clear-cut as it might seem
The language between sexes is more similar than it is different.
One scholar suggested that the popular book, “Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus” should be changed to “Men Are from North Dakota, Women Are from South Dakota.”

26. Culture and Language Verbal Communication Styles Low-context cultures
Generally value language to express thoughts, feelings, and ideas as directly as possible.
High-context cultures
Generally value using language to maintain social harmony.
Learn to discover meaning from the context in which a message is delivered: nonverbal behaviors, history of the relationship, etc

27. Culture and Language Verbal Communication Styles
Language and Worldview
Linguistic relativism
The worldview of a culture is shaped and reflected by the language its members speak.
The Eskimos have a large number of words for snow

28. Chapter Review Language is Symbolic
Understandings and Misunderstandings
The Impact of Language
Gender and Language
Culture and Language