1. Dr. Ng Kee On Clinical Psychologist
Child and Adolescent Sexual Development: If education is the answer, what are the questions?
Dr. Ng Kee On
Clinical Psychologist

2. Sex Education: The Ambivalence

3. can be a dangerous thing
A little knowledge
can be a dangerous thing

4. The $64,000 Question
Does it work?

5. Back to Basics
Why Sex Education?
What it hopes to do/achieve?

6. Current (Parochial) Practices: The “Doomsday” Approach?
Prevention of:
Sexually Transmitted Diseases
Premarital Sex
Promiscuity
Sex-role Confusion
Sexual “Perversity”/ Sexual Abuse

7. The “State” of the Art?
“Adults coming into the classroom and yammering about sex, whether for or against it, just do not have impact on teens.”

8. Are we looking in the right direction?

9. Time for a Paradigm Shift?
Threat /Danger Good & Wellness Decorative Garden Plants Popular Food

10. Sex-Education: Opportunities for Personal Development?
Threat vs Opportunity
Safety Action
vs Creativity
Fear/Anxiety vs
Interest/Optimism

11. The “Consumer-led” Approach
What do most parents want for their child(ren)?

12. What do Children “Want”?
Pleasure ?
Security/Stability
Meaningful (Doing things right: Self-respect & Contentment)
Reference: 3 Seductive Ideas (Jerome Kagan)

13. Beyond the “Birds & Bees” : What do we seek in Sex?
Identity & Sexuality
Affiliation & Belonging (Making & Keeping a Relationship)
Stability & Meaning: Emotional Connectedness & Contentment

14. Putting it into Practice: What should be Included?
Meaning:
Love & Emotional Connectedness
Inter-dependence:
Making & Keeping Relationship
Independence:
Identity & Sexuality
Biology:
Basic Needs

15. Sexuality: In simple language?
Manhood / Womanhood
Attractiveness: Physical and Personality
Intimacy: Physical (non sexual) vs Sexual

16. Making & Keeping Relationship
Communication Skills
Social Skills (e.g. Assertiveness: e.g. how to say no)
Self-Discipline
Recommended reading: When I say no, I feel guilty by M Smith

17. Emotional Connected-ness
Empathy: Being with & Sharing (happiness & sadness)
Attentiveness & Listening
Seeking out: getting to know more of each other, exploring more agreeable/meaningful ways of enhancing the relationship (conflict management)

18. What is listening? 聽

19. Knowing How: How do Children Learn
Through formal teaching
Through observation & modelling
Through participation (e.g. trials and errors) and experience

20. Knowing How: Who Shall do What?
Everyone: Basics; Optimism, Social competence
Family (Parents): Basics; Sexuality; Social Competence; Emotional Connectedness; Values/Norms
School: Basics; Discipline, Peer group & Pro-social activities

21. Knowing How: KISS – the Behavioural Method
3 Basic steps of operations:
Be Positive
Be specific (tangible and non fuzzy)
Be small

22. In a Nutshell: What is the Essence of Sex Education?
Life Skills:
Me: My needs, My way
Thou: Your needs, Your way
Us: Our needs, Our way

23. Any Questions?