1. Argument Essay Feedback
funnyand.com
Despite the bad grammar,
this meme makes me laugh!

2. Feedback: The Confirmations Were Weak
The confirmation should be the heart of the essay, and yet for many of you, it was the shortest section.
Many of you never stated actual reasons—you just provided historical examples.
Change your topic sentences to focus on the reasons that support your point.
Finally, just because the Classical Model has five parts doesn’t mean you only needed five paragraphs.
en.writecheck.com
Give your reasons and fight for them!

3. Feedback: Develop Audience Awareness
War is a weighty and touchy subject, yet many of you were breezy and cavalier about the subject. Be smart, sensitive, and aware of your audience. Here were some troubling comments:
“Yes, people died, but it was for a good cause.”
“War gives us great inventions like nuclear weapons.”
“War is necessary because we get valuable inventions like sanitary napkins.”
Lack of audience awareness makes your arguments invalid

4. Feedback: The Refutations Need Work
Almost all students could have improved their refutations.
Here’s the point: acknowledge the counterargument, and then carefully challenge that assumption through logic or careful evidence.
Even as you present logic or evidence, EXPLAIN your reasoning—some people said inane things like “because of the Holocaust.”
Say more and go deeper—refutations aren’t memes!

5. Feedback: Develop Your Ideas
Everyone needs to develop their ideas more. There is more detail needed with examples, and the examples need to be connected to the topic sentences and thesis statements of the essay.
Many of you assumed that your points were clear. (They weren’t.)
Develop your ideas; Mr. A believes
that you know what you’re doing!

6. Feedback: The Topic Sentences Were Weak
memegenerator.net
Even though it’s already been mentioned, it bears repeating: STRENGTHEN YOUR TOPIC SENTENCES. They should guide and shape your argument.
Make your topic sentences specific, clear, and USE TRANSITIONS.
Your topic sentences orient
and shape your argument

7. Feedback: Cite Your Sources
The examples should have been cited in lead-ins, or in parentheses.
There have been increased instances of plagiarism this year, and Afram has less patience with this issue.
Reminder: If you take the words or ideas from another person or website, acknowledge that source!
memegenerator.net
‘Nuff said

8. Feedback: Watch Your Language
Remember:
Avoid use of “you.”
Avoid contractions like “can’t” or “it’s.”
Make your verbs active—don’t write “Martin Luther King is stating…” Instead, write “Martin Luther King states…”
newmediagenres.org
Listen to Literecy Cat

9. Final Reminder: This is an Argument Essay
This is an argument; stake a claim, give reasons, provide examples, and destroy the opposition.
Most of you were unfocused, informal, and lackadaisical.
Instead, keep your mission and audience in mind and GO FOR IT!
compositionatthebeach.com
Focus on the argument
and revise your work