1. Together for a Lifetime!
Siblings
Together for a Lifetime!

2. Focus
Professionals have been primarily concerned with the mothers’ views with little attention given to that of siblings.
Siblings experience full range of feelings and emotions related to having a sibling with a disability
Feelings can range from “burden” to “joy”

3. Having a sibling with a disability in the family
A child’s disability may have a significant impact on the functioning of the family and on the home environment (McAndrew, 1976; Murphy, 1982) and, as a result, may affect the nondisabled siblings’ psychosocial development over the long term (McKeever, 1983)
The effect of a child’s disability may be particularly significant from childhood to adolescence when children experience major physical and psychological changes (Santrock, 1993)

4. Children with special needs receive a disproportionate share of parents’ attention and time that otherwise might be devoted to other children in the family
Alterations in family roles may give rise to feelings of anger and resentment
Children with siblings who have disabilities, particularly older sisters, are extensively involved in sibling care and in household tasks
Siblings often need to “fight” for their independence, to find a balance between their own needs and of their sibling with a disability

5. Extra time demands for family responsibilities may deprive siblings of people with disabilities experiences outside the home
Siblings feel lonelier, have fewer friends and experience more peer problems compared to other children of their age without siblings with disabilities.

6. Not all siblings will experience negative feelings towards their brother or sister with a disability. Some children adjust well, while others have a more difficult time. Some children may even appear to be coping well but there may be some signs that they are feeling stressed by the situation, for example, they may lose their temper easily, withdraw, have nightmares or show ‘clingy’ behavior. There may also be different reactions depending on whether the sibling is younger or older than the child with the disability. (Siblings, CCA document)

7. In comparison with children who have nondisabled siblings, those with siblings with disabilities typically show:
Lower self-concept
More behavior problems
Reduced parental attention
High parental expectations
Greater social withdrawal and less social competence
Anxiety, withdrawal, depression, acting out behaviors, and school problems

8. Sibling Feelings Fear Loneliness Anger Resentment Embarrassment
Confusion
Jealousy
Pressure
Guilt
Frustration

9. Factors affecting siblings’ psychosocial functioning
Gender and age of the typically developing sibling
Birth order
Type and severity of disability
Socioeconomic status and family size
Parental adjustment and coping strategies
Family climate and ethnicity

10. Positives- Having a sibling with a disability…
Increased patience
Increased kindness and supportiveness
Increased acceptance of differences
Increased compassion and helpfulness
Increased empathy for others and insight into coping with challenges
Increased dependability and loyalty that may come from standing up for their brother or sister.

11. Siblings make wonderful teachers

12. Sibling Roles A continuing, permanent relationship Socialization agent
Long-term playmate and companion
Learn the give-and-take process/to share
Learn to resolve differences
Serve as confidant and counselor

13. Ultimate Importance of Siblings
Family size is decreasing
Individuals are living longer
Families tend to move often
Young siblings spend greater amounts of time in settings supervised by individuals other than parents
Greater pressure on young people to compete
Parents are experiencing more stress
Future guardianship

14. Sibling Needs
Respect
Understanding
Information
Counseling
Training

15. Not inflict pain on those that we loved
There were many times that parents and professionals that heard about our Sunday meetings felt excluded. We heard questions like, “Why are siblings so unwilling to include us?”, “What makes them so angry and resentful?”, “Why don’t they talk to us?” The answer is we could not. We needed to face ourselves and to get in touch with what was happening. This could only be done if we could be sure that we would:
Not inflict pain on those that we loved
Not be judged and found selfish, unkind, maybe even cruel
Not have someone who would try to make us see the other side
Be able to talk and to connect to someone who could truly understand
Sibling Support Group

16. Questions to Ask Siblings
How did you become aware of your sibling’s disability
Have you had any special responsibilities assigned to you as a direct result of your sibling’s condition?
Do you volunteer to help your sibling or are you required to help?
Is there a difference when the sibling is older or younger than you?
Has the family become more or less united?

17. Study results
Examining five families with one child with a disability and their typically developing siblings

18. Case 1: Sophie
Age: 12
Older sibling of a boy with a moderate learning disability and hyperactivity
Children from the second marriage of the mother
Family size: three children, two parents
Low to medium socio-economic status

19. Sophie Self-Perception Profile

20. Case 2: Zoe
Age: 10
Twin of a boy with learning disability and hyperactivity
Family size: two children, two parents
Medium socio-economic status

22. Case 3: Ann Age: 10 years old
Younger sibling of a boy with epilepsy and intellectual disability
Family size: two children, mother (father deceased)
Low to medium socio-economic status

23. Self-perception: Ann

24. Case 4: Kate Age: 11 Older sibling of a girl with Williams syndrome
Family size: two children, two parents
Low to medium socio-economic status

25. Self-perception

26. Case 5: Mary Age: 12 Older sibling of a boy with autism
Family size: three children, parents divorced
Low to medium socio-economic status

27. Self-perception: Mary

28. Findings
All of the children who had siblings with a disability demonstrated low self-worth
All of the children who had siblings with a disability indicated that they felt less socially accepted
2 of the 5 siblings reported behavioral problems at school and at home
All reported that they have extra responsibilities at home because of their sibiling

29. What Siblings Want/Say!
The right to one’s own life
Acknowledgement of their concerns
Reasonable expectations
Expect typical behavior from typically-developing siblings
Have high expectations for their sibling with disability
The right to a safe environment
The Sibling Support Project

30. Opportunities to meet peers
Opportunities to obtain information
Havie a say in their sibling’s future
Include both sons and daughters
Good communication
One-on-one time with parents
Celebration of each child’s milestones/achievements
Fund services for brothers and sisters

31. Parents’ perspective is more important than the actual disability
Include siblings in the definition of ‘family’
Actively reach out to brothers and sisters
Learn more about life as a sibling
Create local programs specifically for brothers and sisters
Include brothers and sisters on advisory boards and in policies concerning families