1. English II Notes: Redundancy and Wordiness in Writing
Name: ________________________
Date: ________________

2. Some Famous or Infamous Examples of Redundancy
"I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law."
     - David Dinkins, New York City Mayor, answering accusations that he failed to pay his taxes.
"We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees."
    - Jason Kidd, upon his drafting to the Dallas Mavericks
"China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese."
     - Former French President Charles De Gaulle
"I'm for abolishing and doing away with redundancy."
      - J. Curtis McKay of the Wisconsin State Elections Board

3. A little advice from our friend, William Strunk Jr
A little advice from our friend, William Strunk Jr., author of Elements of Style
Good writing is concise. A sentence should contain no unnecessary words, a paragraph no unnecessary sentences. This requires not that the writer make all his sentences short, or that he avoid all detail and treat his subjects only in outline, but that every word tell.

4. Shaking the Redundancy Really, Very, Quite, Extremely, Severely, Truly
Eliminate Unnecessary Adverbs
Really, Very, Quite, Extremely, Severely, Truly
John has been quite ill for a really long time.
Here are a few examples of unnecessary words that do not add much meaning to a sentence. Although they do have their place, use sparingly. This first sentence uses two of these words. By removing these words, the sentence’s meaning essentially remains the same.
John has been ill for a long time.

5. Eliminate or Replace Meaningless Adjectives
Good, Nice, Bad, Okay, Important, Significant
Suzy is a good teacher who makes a significant impact on her students and faculty.
Suzy is a talented teacher who makes an impact on her students and faculty.

6. Trimming the Fat Before After At the present time Due to the fact that
Avoid saying the same thing twice or three times when it can be said with one word. A phrase that repeats itself is sometime called a pleonasm.
Due to the fact that
12 midnight
In my opinion, I believe

7. Trimming the Fat
(Cont.)
After
Before
In the event that
In spite of the fact that
In the vicinity of
Until such time as

8. Writing Concise Sentences
Examples:
All things considered, it seems like the new tax cut imposed by the administration will without a doubt make the wealthy wealthier and the poor poorer. When the administration’s new tax cut is passed, the children living in poverty will be affected the worst.
Often times, phrases that we say in conversation show up in our writing. Many of these phrases can be eliminated without taking away from the meaning of the sentence. Also, try not to repeat yourself in the following sentence. With these two ideas in mind, the writing will become tighter and more concise.
The new tax cut imposed by the administration will undoubtedly make the wealthy wealthier and the poor poorer. Consequently, children living in poverty will be severely affected.

9. Avoid Expletive Constructions
There is/are it is
There are over three thousand students attending College of the Siskiyous. It is these students who pay the salaries of the teachers.
Over three thousand students attend College of the Siskiyous. These students pay the teachers’ salaries.
Using these phrases will put your reader to…

10. How many times do I have to repeat myself???
Michael Jordan was the best basketball player ever. Jordan was slam dunk master.
Basketball star Michael Jordan was the best basketball player ever and slam dunk master.
John found the job to be easy, and Jen also thought it was simple. Mike completed the job without difficulty too.
John, Jen, and Mike found the job to be easy.

11. The
End!