1. Chapter 13

2. Romantic Love (physical lust) Lust in classical myth- poems that caution against and recommend. Venus in mythology cursed love after Adonis (her love) died, will cause suffering, war, misery Lust in Medieval times-although strongly Christian times, lust creeps into poems and songs (Canterbury Tales) Lust in Shakespeare- Romeo and Juliette pursue their physical attraction, disregarding everything else, people embraced hedonism at this time

3. A Thousand and One Nights-Scheherezade is the young bride of a Sultan. After their wedding nights, the Sultan has his new brides executed. In order to avoid her fate, Scheherezade tells his stories for 1001 nights until he sees her as a human and not to be killed Tells of wild love, scandalized their Victorian counterparts

4. 18 th century-it was expected men kept mistresses Common theme in arts of the time- The Marriage of Figaro Don Giovanni

5. Greek for love Platonic Love- Platos term for nonphysical love (family and friendship fall under this category), the highest form of love is the love of a beautiful mind Platonic love (Agape)was taken on by Christians to refer to the love God shows humanity, and human spiritual love Few can live up to these standards, transcend physical, passage of time, ideal of perfection

6. Expect loyalty and favors without asking why Family dynamics have changed over time Role of step siblings/parents, non-traditional families, biological vs. adopted How important are blood ties, less about blood, more about family bonds Families still have conflict

7. Hebrews developed father-child relationship with god, set standard for families (love/fear/respect) Wives join new families Honor thy father and thy mother (restatement of tribal requirements) Confucius wants an elder-centered home, very different from todays child-centered

8. According to Plato, friendship is among the highest goods of the happy life. kin by choice Increased importance in a world where the nuclear family (parents, kids, grandkids) is deteriorating. Now have extended family which includes blood relatives, life-long friends, recent acquaintances American fear of isolation in modern society Commercial example

9. Archetype of The One, common in Western culture, but not universal Belief in true love which transcends physical attraction, or social advantage Basis of hopes and dreams for millions Willing to suffer for it Rooted in 3 sources- Mariolatry, Chivalry, Romance genre

10. MariolatryRomance and Chivalry Idolatry of Mary People were fascinated by her purity and glory Held women to the same standards Romance as a literary genre came from this time Chivalry-knights code of honor, protect, placing the lady first in any order of events True love was made in heaven and therefore above earthly concerns (physical)

11. Courtly LoveLove as a Game Set of rules for proper courtship Man would declare passionate love for a lady, attempt a series of tasks to perform to earn her love High-bred woman was meant to be adored, man was her slave love is a game of seduction 17 th century aristocrats would start verbal matches, then over time end in physical or physical- romantic relationships Much Ado About Nothing, Taming of the Shrew

12. The Victorian Model Very strict code of conduct Specific gender roles- male is the breadwinner, make the big decisions, decide who their daughters married Female ran the household, dealt with the servants, chose the menu, wore costly clothing and jewels to show off husbands wealth Double standard-women must be chaste, still exists today

14. Pairing of love and disease has a long history in the humanities Losing love to aids, consumption, or other illnesses Love and old age

15. Warnings about separating love and sex are evident in literary works that attack utopianism (belief that there are ideal ways to plan and run a society) Platos The Republic Aldous Huxleys Brave New World Orwells 1984 Atwoods The Handmaidens Tale All of these show that love is a natural instinct that cannot be denied or controlled by outside forces

16. Humanities teach us that we are free to choose, and that includes the freedom to define love What is most meaningful for us? May choose to remain single May decide love is not to be defined at all