1. Developing Effective Leaders
Managing Challenging Situations and People

2. Yelling to handle challenging situations and people

3. Using resources and data to make a point

4. When followers just don’t want to go along with the leader

5. Using physical force or threats to persuade others

6. Objectives
Recognize the personal and professional benefits of successfully working with challenging people and situations.
Understand your own approaches to managing conflict.
Identify the characteristics of challenging people and situations.
Manage interpersonal differences.
Manage false agreement when setting personal and organizational goals.

7. Conflict as Opportunity
An opportunity for:
personal & organization change
learning
growth
improved performance
Points out existing barriers to success.

8. Do you understand your own beliefs, attitudes, and values?
People react differently to the same challenging situations.
Understanding your tolerance and acceptance level is key to managing challenging situations and people effectively.
Activity: The Gold Watch

9. Managing Conflict Creatively
What is your conflict management style?
Aggressive/Confrontive
Assertive/Persuasive
Observant/Introspective
Avoidant/Reactive
Activity: Your Conflict Management Style

10. Conflict Resolution Teams
The secret of managing is to keep the guys who hate you away from the guys who are undecided Casey Stengel

11. Categories of Challenging People
Complainers
Super-Agreeables
Negativists
Silent-Unresponsives
Indecisives
Hostile-Aggressives
Know-It-All Experts

12. Complainers
Twenty percent of the people will be against anything. Robert Kennedy U.S. Attorney General

13. Super-Agreeables
There’s nothing I’m afraid of like scared people. Robert Frost

14. Negativists
It takes a clever man to turn a cynic and a wise man to be clever enough not to Fannie Hurst

15. Silent-Unresponsives
Silence is the best tactic for him who distrusts himself. Francois, Duc de La Rochefoucauld

16. Indecisives
There is no more miserable human being than one in whom nothing is habitual but indecision William James

17. Hostile-Aggressives
Anybody can become angry - that is easy; but to be angry with the right person, to the right degree, at the right time, for the right purpose, and in the right way -that is not within everybody’s power and is not easy Aristotle

18. Know-It-All Experts
They spend their time mostly looking forward to the past. John Osborne in Look Back in Anger

19. 10 General Strategies Put problem people in proper perspective.
Take your pick -- positive or negative.
Don’t expect difficult people to change.
Learn to respond as well as listen.
Give and request frequent feedback.
Look first at policies and procedures.
Deal directly and discreetly.
Document for self-protection.
Be straightforward and unemotional.
Be gracious.

20. Communicating One-on-One
Spend time on rapport.
Minimize interruptions.
Watch out for psychological barriers.
Be aware of your posture.
Use intensity to your advantage.
Go to the other person’s turf.

21. Listening As important as talking… Pay respectful attention.
Let the speaker know how you interpret his/her message through:
interested silence
body language
verbal responses

22. “I” and “You” Messages “You” messages are:
Directed at the other person.
Highly likely to put the recipient down.
Going to make the recipient feel:
guilty
like their needs are unimportant
resistant to change
“You” messages remove the responsibility for behavior change from the other person.

23. “I” Messages Parts of an “I” message: Specific behavior or situation
Your resulting feeling
Tangible effect on you

24. False Agreement “On the Road to Abilene” The Abilene Paradox
Moral of the story:
There is a difference between real and phony conflict.
False agreement is as damaging as disagreement.
Skills in agreement management include “Owning up” and “Risk taking.”

25. Case Studies and Activities

26. Closing Thoughts You can control yourself.
You can manage the situation.
However, you cannot control another person.