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Dating What does dating mean to you??
What is a prime factor in determining your readiness to date? What is one of the most expensive dates for teens? Who is typically ready to date first: males or females? Why? What dating qualifications do you have for your dating partner? Dating
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Bell Work List the three main functions of dating.
Identify the different family types. Identify the cycles in the Family Life cycle. Identify the first 2 stages of dating. How does socioeconomic status play a part in mate selection? List factors in a successful marriage.
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Purposes of Dating (Why do you date)
Socialization: To develop appropriate social skills To practice getting along with others in different settings Recreation: To have fun and enjoy the companionship of others To try new and different activities Mate Selection: To see others in many different settings To compare the personality and characteristics of many people
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Functions of DAting Understanding Others
Dating is a socially accepted way for young people to develop close friendships with members of the opposite sex. In the process of dating, you can learn how others think and feel, what they like to do, and what their goals are. You can get to know them as individuals with their own unique characteristics.
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Understanding Yourself
When people show their like or dislike about things it allows you to also reflect on what you like. Sharing ideas back and forth can help people understand their own thoughts and feelings. Providing Companionship Sometimes people date in order to be with someone. They want someone to be their companion. Companionship dating is usually based on friendship.
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Improving Communication Skills
Dating provides opportunities to talk and listen to members of the opposite sex. Dating provides opportunities to send messages. When you share personal thoughts, feeling, desires, and goals, others will get to know you. Your verbal and nonverbal messages need to match.
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Learning to Be Responsible
Learning to Negotiate Dating requires that young people consider others’ opinions when decision need to be made. When two people make plans for a date they learn how to negotiate. Learning to Be Responsible Dating provides opportunities to take responsibility for your decisions. Dating also provides experience in committing yourself to helping another person grow.
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Evaluating Personality Traits
One of the main benefits of dating is the chance to find out what personality traits you most like in a partner. If you have dated only a few people, you don’t have much information to use in making comparisons. You learn to evaluate qualities and find those that do or do not appeal to you. You become more aware of what it takes to get along with someone of the opposite sex. The qualities you would like to find in your ideal mate for marriage become easier to identify.
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Are you a good date In your opinion, what does it take to be a good date (person, not the activity)??
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Attraction Your appearance:
If you want to create a good impression and be a good date you need to look your best. (Notice, the word best, it does not mean you have to look hot) People like their dates to look nice, not only for their own visual pleasure, but also because they prefer to be seen with attractive people
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Clothing Selection and Care:
Good Grooming: Clean hair that is properly cut and shaped will enhance your total appearance. Good grooming habits help you show that you care about yourself and about other people’s opinions of you. Clothing Selection and Care: There is a saying that “clothing makes the person.” This is because people often judge you according to the clothes you wear. Different clothes create different images. Proper care of clothing is also important. Hang or fold garments carefully.
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Your posture: If you slump your shoulders, bow your head, and keep your eyes on the floor, you give the impression of wanting to go unnoticed. If you life your chin, square your shoulders, and walk with pride, others will see that you are full of vitality. Posture can communicate your self-confidence.
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Bell work Look for your new seat!!!
Refer back to what you read yesterday, “Appointment with Love” Write your own ending to the story. (Does he go after her, does he not. Is he upset about the test, is he thankful)
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Positive and Negative Dating Characteristics
Being concerned with your date’s comfort. Being able to carry on a conversation. Being able to ask questions. Stay attentive to your date. Show respect for the other person. Be yourself: be genuine.
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Negative: Speaking freely of past relationships.
Being oblivious to the partner’s need. Being unfamiliar with rules of etiquette. Pointing out faults. Dominating the topic. Pretending to know everything.
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Stages of DAting Stage 1: Gushy Typical Characteristics Problems
“We have so many things in common.” Characteristics Artificial – both on best behavior Same likes: music, cars, people, food Everything is funny Lots of talking to each other on the phone. Problems Whether to express affection or not. How to say goodnight. Prefer group association to being alone.
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Stage 2: Playing Games Typical Characteristics
Have hearts crossed out all over their notebooks. Have swollen eyes from crying on the average of three times a day. Characteristics Very possessive and jealous Comes late for dates or not ready. Personality traits valued more than just an interest in the opposite sex. A time of extremes: tears, happiness Power struggle – where to eat, what show to go see.
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Stage 3: Goal-Directed Characteristics
They are glad to see each other do things with other friends. They trust one another. They want each other to be happy. They are interested in seeing each other fulfill goals. They are more interested in each other’s long-term happiness than in their own short-term pleasure. May be engaged or near engagement. Begin to notice things in each other: picky about food, stays up late, spend-thrift, etc.
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Ending a Relationship Realize your partner will feel hurt.
Be sensitive to the other person’s feelings. Show empathy. Explain how you feel and why you think the relationship should end. Change your dating patterns. You both need some time away from familiar sites that remind you of each other. Once the pain of the break-up has lessened, you may be able to be friends with your former partner.
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Recognize your feelings as normal.
Feelings of pain and loneliness don’t mean that you made a wrong decision. These feelings are a sign that the relationship was valuable to you. They are not a sign that you made a mistake. Emphasize other aspects of your life. If you are the person who wanted to relationship to continue, you may feel lonely or depressed for a while. To ease the pain think about activities you like to do. Learn a new skill or read a book. Spend more time with family or friends. The pain will pass. And you will be able to put your energy into building a relationship again.
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Types of Love Romantic Love/Infatuation
Based on instant desire for each other. Decreases over time. Self-centered with attitudes like, “I don’t want to lose you. You’re the best thing that ever happened to me. Let’s hurry up and get married.” Possessive and one-sided. Leaves nagging doubts, unanswered questions, or areas that you don’t want to question. Lacks confidence and trust in each other’s commitment. Often involves pressure to be sexually involved.
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Mature Love Based on sharing interest and ideas.
Deepens and grows as a friendship grows. Other-centered, giving of the self to benefit the other person. Encourages growth in the other person. Accepting of each other, even with imperfections. Trusting and secure. Patient, kind, and wailing to take time to make wise decisions.
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