1. I can describe a healthy relationship
Year 4 – Friends and family
I can describe a healthy relationship
Teacher notes:
Through this lesson you will take the children on a journey that allows them to identify the attributes they possess that help them to form good, healthy, positive relationships with everyone around them. There are a number of activities for them to participate in that should help them to reflect on their own characteristics and how they play a part in the relationships that they develop every day.
© Leeds South and East CCG

2. Learning outcomes Knowledge Skills
I can name some attributes that contribute to a healthy relationship
I can identify some of these attributes in myself
I can recognise that we don’t all like the same things and my behaviour shows that this is ok
I recognise what constitutes a positive, healthy relationship
I have developed the skills to form and maintain positive and healthy relationships
Teacher notes
Read these through with the children, ensure they are understood.
It is important for the children to understand how we all have relationships with other people and how we need to have certain qualities, characteristics, attributes in order to maintain these relationships. The children need to understand that good relationships are so important to keep us happy and healthy. By understanding this they can begin to protect themselves when they recognise things going wrong. 2

3. How we will work together
Can you remember the ground rules we have already talked about, let’s take a minute to think about them.
Teacher notes
Read these through with the children. Hopefully the ground rules will be displayed in the classroom already. 3

4. What do we already know?
This is Lily. Imagine that she has just arrived at this school and is about to join your class.
Teacher notes:
Ask the children the question on the slide. Show the children the slide of the child starting a new school. Ask them to decide all the good characteristics and attributes she needs to have in order to make some new friends in class. Ask the class if they think it is just Lily that needs to have these or, if Lily were joining their class, should they (the children in the class) have some of these attributes as well?
What characteristics (attributes) do you think she needs in order to make some good friends? 4

5. Let’s get started
Skill Practice Can I name some attributes that contribute to a healthy relationship
Demanding
Patient
Unfriendly
Listener
Uncooperative
Nasty
Unkind
Clever
Lazy
Happy
Fun
Adventurous
Kind
Friendly
Selfish
Mean
Trustworthy
Bossy
Independent
Polite
Forgiving
Angry
Cruel
Enthusiastic
Supportive
Miserable
Understanding
Aggressive
Honest
Dishonest
Messy
Careful
Hard working
Teacher notes
Using the attributes on the slide, assign one to each of the children in the class, they could maybe write them on a piece of paper or on their white boards (or you could do this before the lesson starts, depending on the class you have, which ever you think will be easier.) Next, draw an imaginary line on the floor, or use a piece of rope or masking tape to make one. At one end place a piece of paper that says ‘an attribute that is important for a healthy, positive relationship’, at the other end put a piece of paper down saying ‘an attribute that is not important for a healthy, positive relationship.’ (You could add one in the middle that simply says ‘don’t know’ or ‘ this attribute is neither important nor not important). Ask the children to place their piece of paper/card down where they feel it belongs on the line and then stand back and think about where different attributes have been placed by their class mates. They could discuss these with partners or in groups. Hopefully this will get the children to start thinking about all the things that contribute to good positive, healthy relationships. 5

6. Who recognises these lads?
Teacher notes
Remind the children of The Rainbow Fish clip that they watched last year, how they looked at how their behaviour impacts on others. Tell them that they are looking deeper into this and looking at how their behaviour interacts with others and following on from this relationships are formed. Ask the children who recognises the pair and where do they recognise them from (clarify that they are well known for their amazing friendship). Watch the clip on Ant and Dec that show their very strong and positive relationship. Click on the picture to open the link. Encourage the children to watch the clip and think about why their relationship is so good, think about all those attributes
Why is the relationship between these boys so good?
© Ant and Dec. 6

7. What makes relationships strong, healthy and positive?
What attributes do Ant and Dec have that make their relationship so strong and positive?
Skill Practice Can I name some attributes that contribute to a healthy relationship?
Teacher notes
Give the children 3-4 minutes to discuss what attributes they think Ant and Dec have that make their relationship so healthy and positive. Let the children discuss this in partners and make notes. Ask them if they think the boys have the same relationships with other people in their life? Ask them if they think this is a special relationship or one that we could all have? Why are relationships so important? Why is it important that we consider our part in relationships? 7

8. What relationships do you have?
Skill Practice Can I identify some of these attributes in myself?
Draw a picture of yourself with lots of people around you, both friends and family. Using some of the attributes that we have looked at today, write those attributes that you think you have that help you with these different relationships.
Teacher notes:
This activity is just a chance for the children to consolidate their thoughts on relationships and the part that they have to play in their own relationships. Spend some time walking around asking them if they feel they could improve their relationships, or how could they contribute more to their relationships? What attributes do they require for this? What attributes are they proud that they have and which ones do they wish they could develop? Are their relationships different with friends and family? If they find it hard to draw pictures of people then they could just do stick people or more simplified people as the focus is not on the drawing. Put the slide back on to the list of attributes that was shown earlier in the lesson to support them. 8

9. Let’s discuss…
Can everyone think of one attribute that they are proud to have that helps them in their relationships with others?
Skill Practice Can I name some attributes that contribute to a healthy relationship?
Teacher notes
Read the slide to the class and start by telling the class an attribute that you are proud to have. Then ask the children to share one attribute, that they are proud to have, with their partner. Ask a few of the children to share their partners attribute with the rest of the class. Ask them if they think it depends on who the relationship is with as to which attribute is a good one. Ask them then to think about an attribute that they would like to develop, how could they do this?
We should be proud of this attribute
Can we think of another attribute that we would like to develop? 9

10. How has our learning progressed?
This is Lily. She has just arrived at this school and is about to join your class.
Teacher notes:
Go through the slide again with Lily, the new girl. Ask the children if they can think of any extra attributes that they feel Lily might find useful in order to help her fit into the new school. Compare their knowledge to the first time they saw this slide.
What characteristics (attributes) do you think she needs in order to make some good friends? 10

11. How can we take this learning outside the classroom?
We have just talked about attributes that we are proud of as well as one we would like to develop.
Go home and discuss the one that you would like to develop with someone at home?
See if you can come up with a way to develop this attribute
As you talk, try to acknowledge that we have different attributes and that this may be because we all like and want different things
Skill Practice
Can I recognise that we don’t like the same thing and that this is ok?
Teacher notes
Ask the children to be a bit more mindful of how they respond to their parents when they are asked to do jobs/go to bed/ get up/ do homework at home. Ask them how their parents react when they do exactly what is asked of them. Do they feel that by doing what is asked of them that they are cooperating or not? 11

12. Additional resources and help
Talk to your teacher or an adult in school
Talk to your Mum, Dad or someone you trust at home about how you are feeling
If you have them: – Write your worry down and post it in the class worry box – Talk to a peer mediator in your school – Write your worry down on the worry wall on the school’s website
Contact:
im-a-young-person
Where can I go for help? 12