1. TOPIC 4: ATTRACTION Prof Madya Dr. Mariani Mansor

2. Affiliation
What is Affiliation?

3. Affiliation: The Origins Of Attraction
Most people find companionship to be a central & essential components of life.
People forced to live alone, typically will feel extreme apathy & a sense of withdrawal. The longer the isolation, the more they think & dreams about other people.
Why physical isolation from other people so unpleasant?
The presence of other fulfill one fundamental need – the need for affiliation

4. Why Need Affiliation With Others?
Stanley Schachter’s study (1956) affiliation needs could be aroused by fear.
Most participants who were in this high-fear situation chose to wait others.
Participants expecting a strong shock may have anticipated that the presence of the other people could directly reduce their anxiety by offering comfort, consolation & reassurance.
In contrast, in a control condition in which participants were threatened with a mild, relatively painless shock, most participants chose to wait by themselves.
relate to social comparisons processes  i.e. the need to evaluate one’s own behavior, expertise, abilities & opinions by comparing them with those of other people.

5. The Need For Affiliation: Reducing Fear and Isolation According to social comparison theory:
People are dependent on others for information about the world around them.
They use the behavior and views of others to evaluate their own  because the objective reality of a situation is often ambiguous or simply unknowable.
Social comparison processes may have led fearful participants to attempt to understand & control their own emotions by comparing themselves with others in their own situation.
By seeking out the company of others, participants may have tried to understand & control their own emotions & feelings.
The need for affiliation is the desire to seek relationships with other people.

6. The Need For Affiliation: Reducing Fear and Isolation
Although the strength of this need varies from one person to the next and from one situation to another, everyone holds to some degree a basic desire to forge associations with others.
However, people don’t indiscriminately pursue relationships with others.
Schachter later research showed that he was partially correct, i.e. People seek out others who are in a similar situation because others help clarify the situation they face.
In simple terms, the presence of the others provides information about what to expect, and do not always have to feel miserable themselves to provide useful information.

7. When does People do not seek for affiliation?
In misery
Stress
Anxiety

8. When does People do not seek for affiliation?
In misery
In some instances, the level of misery is so strong that people avoid the presence of others.
Stress
When people are deeply stressed, they fear that exposure to the unhappiness/depression of others will increase their own unhappiness.
Normally when in stress and deep emotional chaos, people may avoid contact with others.
Anxiety
People with social anxiety are so fearful of the possible consequences of being with people, such as rejection, that they sometimes avoid contact with others.
So, often people perceived them as unfriendly, unpleasant, and socially incompetent - and others actually do begin to reject them.

9. What is belongingness? The need to belong  seeking relationship
Some social psychologists suggest that the need for affiliation is part of a broader human motivation: the need for belongingness.
The need for belongingness is the need to establish and maintain at least a minimum number of interpersonal relationship.
The need for belongingness broadens the concept, suggesting that people are motivated to maintain a minimum quantity of ongoing relationships.

10. The need to belong: seeking relationship
2 essential components:
To experience belongingness, people require frequent interactions and personal contacts with other individuals.
A sense of belongingness occurs when relationships are stable, when they are likely to continue into the future, and when the parties involved genuinely like one another.
People who lack belongingness often suffer from many problems, such as experince of physical and mental disorders, problems related to poorer health, adjustment problem, crime activity, suicide etc.

11. Attraction

12. What cause attraction?

13. What Causes Attraction?
Friendships
Close relationships
ETC.

14. Basic principles In general… We like people who like us.
We like people who satisfy our needs.
We like people when the rewards they provide outweigh the costs (social exchange theory)

15. Specific Determinants of Liking…
Proximity (Propinquity Effect)
Familiarity
Similarity
Personal Qualities of the Other
Physical attractiveness

16. 1. Proximity (Propinquity Effect)
The best single predictor of whether two people will be friends is how far apart they live
Propinquity effect  the more we see and interact with people, the more likely they are to become our friends (the next door effect).
The closer people lived, the more friendly they became with each other

17. 2. Familiarity
The mere exposure effect : simply being exposed to a person (or other stimulus) tends to increase liking for it.
Why does familiarity promote liking?
Evolutionarily adaptive
Improved recognition is a 1st step to liking
Familiar is more predictable
Familiar is assumed to be similar to self

18. 2. Familiarity Limits to Mere Exposure
Most effective if stimulus is initially viewed as positive or neutral
Pre-existing conflicts between people will get intensified, not decrease, with exposure
There is an optimal level of exposure: too much can lead to boredom and satiation

19. 3. Similarity
We like others who are similar to us in attitudes, interests, values, background & personality.
Reserch: Newcomb (1961) assigned roommates to be either very similar or very dissimilar and measured liking at the end of the semester. Those who were similar liked each other while those who were dissimilar disliked each other.
In romantic relationships, the tendency to choose similar others is called the matching principle i.e. People tend to match their partners on a wide variety of attributes
age, intelligence, education, religion, attractiveness, height
But friendship and love can transcend differences in background

20. 3. Similarity: Why do people prefer similar others?
Similar others are more rewarding.
Interacting with similar others minimizes the possibility of cognitive dissonance
We expect to be more successful with similar others.
Mechanisms that foster similarity in close relationships are:
Selective attraction
Social influence
Shared environmental factors
As people interact with similar others, they tend to become even more similar

21. 4. Desirable Personal Attributes
Examples of desirable personal attributes are trustworthiness, warmth and competence.
Warmth – Often have a positive attitude and express liking, praise, and approval. Often show non-verbal behaviors such as smiling, attentiveness, and expressing emotions.
Competence - We like people who are socially skilled, intelligent, & competent. Such as have social skills for friends, but being “too perfect” can be off-putting
However, some personal qualities that initially attract us to someone can sometimes turn out to be fatal flaws to a relationship
E.g., the “fun-loving” boyfriend who is later dismissed as “immature”….leads to breakup.

22. 5. Physical Attractiveness
We also tend to like attractive people more. Reasons is that they are believed to possess other good qualities, such as more socially skilled, more intelligent, dominant, & mentally healthy.
Other Effects of Attractiveness
Physically attractive people are more likely to receive help, job recommendations, and more lenient punishments
People who are disabled are stereotyped as unattractive.
People who are obese are stigmatized and face discrimination in the workplace.
The negative view occurs because people are seen as responsible for their weight.

23. 5. Physical Attractiveness
Who is Attractive?
Culture plays a large role in standards of attractiveness.
Why does attractiveness matter?
People believe attractiveness is correlated with other positive characteristics
Being associated with an attractive individual may lead a person to be seen as more attractive him or herself
According to evolutionary theory, attractiveness may provide a clue to health and reproductive fitness

24. Sex Differences in Mate Selection
For both sexes, characteristics such as dependability, maturity, and pleasantness are most important.
Men rank physical attractiveness higher.
Women rank financial resources higher.
Men prefer younger partners, while women prefer older partners.