1. Examples

2. Example #1
In his tragedy address, Ronald Reagan uses positive diction to honor the losses of the Challenger Seven to help mourning families. Before listing the names of the fallen, Reagan emphasizes that “[Americans have] forgotten the courage it took for the crew of the shuttle” and that the Challenge Seven “did their jobs brilliantly” (2). Reagan uses words like “courage” and “brilliantly” as an attempt to ease the families of the Challenger Seven. He switches his tone from solemn to reassuring and light-hearted. By using uplifting diction, Reagan’s attitude serves as a light in the times of dark mourning for the families.

3. Example #2
Through his speech, Reagan utilizes specific diction to address and appeal to the American people. When addressing the young, innocent school children, Reagan simplifies his vocabulary and clarifies that “[he] knows [the situation] is hard to understand, but sometimes painful things like this happen” (5). He illustrates the atrocity of the disaster in a vague manner for schoolchildren to rationalize their feelings without a complete understanding of the situation. Reagan does not diminish the pain; he simply generalizes his speech to comfort and aid the school children.

4. Example #3 (embedding)
He simply acknowledges that “it’s hard to understand” and that “things like this happen” (5).

5. Examples #4 and #5 (embedding)
In his address, he emphasizes that “[he] always had great faith and respect for our space program” even when things go wrong because “that’s the way freedom is, and [he] wouldn’t change it for a minute” (6).
To avoid any outpouring criticism towards NASA, Reagan asserts that “the future doesn’t belong to the fainthearted; it belongs to the brave” (5).

6. Example #6 (embedding, verb use, and phrasing)
Reagan idolizes the late astronauts by comparing them with the great explorer, Francis Drake. During the latter half of his speech, Reagan calls Francis Drake “the great explorer” and reminds his audience that “[Drake] lived by the sea, died on it ,and was buried in it” (Reagan 9). He proceeds to return the focus to the lost crew by reminding listeners that “[the crew’s] dedication was, like Drake’s, complete” (9). This reiterates the astonishment, pointing out that they are similar to, even comparable with, a famous explorer and amazing man.

7. Example #7 (how to use a mentor sentence to your advantage)
His word choice – simple and relaxed – allows them to comprehend the fact that tragic events happen for unknown reasons.

8. Example #8 (great example to show how to improve topic sentence, embedding, and minor details)
In Reagan’s Challenger Tragedy Address, he changes the tone of his speaking so all impacted groups of citizens would understand. When speaking to the children Reagan addresses, “I know it’s hard to understand” (5). Reagan speaks in a way to show sympathy for the children who may have a difficult time comprehending the tragedy. Reagan stresses, “sometimes painful things like this happen” (5). By using “sometimes” and “painful things,” it allows the children to process that tragedies occur. Instead of using harsh diction, he uses words and phrases to appeal to the young school children.

9. Example #8 (great example to show how to improve topic sentence, embedding, and minor details)
In Reagan’s Challenger Tragedy Address, he changes the tone of his speaking so all impacted groups of citizens would understand. When speaking to the children Reagan addresses, “I know it’s hard to understand” (5). Reagan speaks in a way to show sympathy for the children who may have a difficult time comprehending the tragedy. Reagan stresses, “sometimes painful things like this happen” (5). By using “sometimes” and “painful things,” it allows the children to process that tragedies occur. Instead of using harsh diction, he uses words and phrases to appeal to the young school children.

10. Example #8 (great example to show how to improve topic sentence, embedding, and minor details)
In Reagan’s Challenger Tragedy Address, he changes the tone of his speaking so all impacted groups of citizens would understand. When speaking to the children Reagan addresses, “I know it’s hard to understand” (5). Reagan speaks in a way to show sympathy for the children who may have a difficult time comprehending the tragedy. Reagan stresses, “sometimes painful things like this happen” (5). By using “sometimes” and “painful things,” it allows the children to process that tragedies occur. Instead of using harsh diction, he uses words and phrases to appeal to the young school children.
Topic Sentence: what does he want the children to understand? What’s the purpose? To calm? To justify? To reassure? What is the tone? Use your list.
Read your embedding aloud. The citation is correct, it IS better than just having a stand-alone quote, but what do you notice about how it reads?
What should we change “it” to?

11. Example #8 (great example to show how to improve topic sentence, embedding, and minor details)
DID NOT CHANGE THE TOPIC SENTENCE- I want this writer to try that!
In Reagan’s Challenger Tragedy Address, he changes the tone of his speaking so all impacted groups of citizens would understand. When speaking to the children Reagan shares that he “[knows] it’s hard to understand,” carefully recognizing the school children’s confusion and difficulty with comprehending the strategy (5). Through his display of sympathy, he comforts them with a statement that validates their reaction.
Following this, Reagan stresses how “sometimes painful things like this happen” (5). By using “sometimes” and “painful things,” he allows the children to process that tragedies occur. Instead of using harsh diction, he uses words and phrases to appeal to the young school children.

12. Clinch

13. Clinch
is a concluding sentence, which ends the body paragraph
does not transition or preview the next topic
is stylistic and powerful, drawing a conclusion about all the evidence presented

14. To create a sense of togetherness and unity, Reagan maximizes his use of pronouns in his speech. While almost repetitive, the pronoun “we” was used thirty-one times over the course of his short speech. For instance, Reagan says “We've grown used to the idea of space, and perhaps we forget that we've only just begun” (Reagan 5). In one sentence, using we three times, Reagan emphasizes “we” are really all in fault, grief, and recovery. To further analyze, he specifically addresses “NASA,” the “schoolchildren,” and the other “ladies and gentlemen” of America. Additionally, by personally recognizing the entirety of America, Raegan, moreover, reunites its inhabitants. While evaluating NASA, Reagan emphasizes that “we know your anguish. We share it” (9); furthermore, extending this idea this is not just a NASA issue, it is an American tragedy in which we are suffering together, not alone. Incorporating even more unity, Reagan identifies each lost astronaut in the Challenger Shuttle: Michael Smith, Dick Scobee, Judith Resnik, Ronald McNair, Ellison Onizuka, Gregory Jarvis, and Christa McAuliffe. Following it with “We mourn their loss as a nation together” (3). By facilitating that we mourn together as a nation, Reagan truly hits unity home with this rhetorical strategy of extensively overusing pronouns. With this intact, Reagan pushes all of America to move through this together, giving this generalized sense of hope, in turn, leading towards a faster recovery from this tragedy.

15. Other Clinch Examples
Among all, Reagan’s careful use of collective pronouns works to achieve his central goal: national unity.
His patriotic metaphors having contributed to his authoritative tone, Bush – through figurative means – invigorates Americans with pride for their country, along with a sense of a security.

16. So now what?
Stage 1- if you are in stage 1, that means you have a number of things to work on, whether it be embedding, reworking your topic sentence, selecting better verbs, fixing awkward or weak phrasing…etc. This may include rewriting many portions, or sometimes, rethinking most of the paragraph…you need to fix these things before adding more evidence/analysis and attempting a clinch.
Stage 2- if you are in stage 2, the may have a couple things to fix (items mentioned in stage 1) but to a lesser degree. You only have one or two things to fix before adding more evidence/analysis and attempting a clinch.
Stage 3 – if you are in stage 3, you probably have minimal items to improve on and can easily continue on with more evidence/analysis and attempting a clinch.

17. Start marking up "I Have a Dream”
Anything unfinished, please complete at home for next class
Mark up for ELP, Anaphora, Allusions, Metaphors
There are other devices, but those are the main ones…think of the devices from Challenger