1. Managing severe emotions and behaviours
Webinar with Simon Furlong
Tuesday 13 March 1pm

2. Aggression (Inc. hitting & biting)
Schooling
Intense Sibling Rivalry
Lying / Stealing
Managing severe emotions & behaviours What might this look like for you?
Difficulty coping with Family celebrations & holidays
Child refusing to settle at bed time
Eating difficulties
Coping with change
Training

3. Lack of secure foundations
Food / Milk
Play
Fun
Safety
Home
Stability
Cuddles
Warmth
Safe from abuse
Boundaries
Stimula
tion
Routine
Attunement
Eye contact
Speech
Friends
Trust
Learning
Training

4. What happens when the building blocks are not in place?
Attachment difficulties
Brain Development
What happens when the building blocks are not in place?
Impact on learning
Challenging behaviours
Training

5. emotions & behaviours are the child’s first language
I am scared & I need you
Scared & frightened toddler
Training

6. What does the world look like through the lenses of my child?
Training

7. The importance of looking after yourself
How are you filled / revived?
Training

8. Models for Responding to Children’s Behaviour:
Non-Violent Resistance
Great Behavioural Breakdown
PACE
Life Story
Theraplay
Training

9. De-Escalation & Distraction
“YOU CAN MAKE THE BIGGEST DIFFERENCE IN YOUR CHILD’S LIFE WHEN YOU LEARN HOW TO BE RESPONSIVE RATHER THAN REACTIONARY TO YOUR ADOPTED CHILD’S BEHAVIOUR”
De-Escalation & Distraction
Training

10. LOVE & Fear All behaviour arises from a state of stress!
Between the behaviour and stress is a primary emotion
Two primary emotions:
LOVE & Fear
We have a choice as to how to respond
Story of Ghandi’s grandson
Training

11. I not You! “I can see you are feeling sad” I am ok You OK
“It hurts me when you lie as it feels like you do not trust me”
I am ok
You OK
Training

12. I GUESS YOU MUST BE FEELING A BIT WORRIED TO?
I love you. You and me OK?
Everything is going to be OK
Training

13. Being Playful / Relationship gesture
Nurture
Engagement
Theraplay
Structure
Challenge
Training

14. Give the child a narrative by what we are thinking about them:
Discuss the behaviour
PACE: Curiosity
NVR: Pronouncement
GBB: Shine a Light!
Life Story
Give the child a narrative by what we are thinking about them:
“I notice that you always prefer your room to be ---I wonder if it reminds you of your birth family.”
How Scary?
Training

15. “Strike when the iron is cold”
Training

16. • What has life been like for my child / what is it like for them now?
Summary
• What has life been like for my child / what is it like for them now?
• Look after yourself
• Focus on the relationship with your child
Discuss the behaviours
Training

17. Questions and Answers