1. THE POWER
OF FAILURE
Deborah Gilboa, MD

2. hap·pi· ness: noun good fortune; pleasure; contentment; joy
INGREDIENTS:
Confidence
Competence
Relationships

3. WHY DO ADULTS
SAY NO?

4. CULTURE OF “SUCCESSFUL” FAMILIES
Myth vs
Truth

5. SOURCE: Journal of Child and Family Studies, Feb 2013

6. THE COST
“Students who reported having over-controlling parents reported significantly higher levels of depression and less satisfaction with life. Furthermore, the negative effects of helicopter parenting on college students’ well-being were largely explained by the perceived violation of students’ basic psychological needs for autonomy and competence.”

7. HOW DOES FAILURE HELP? independence → confidence Leads to competence
Builds relationship
Teaches resilience. 7

8. RESILIENCE CHALLENGES
Mistakes
Accidents
Pain
Social consequences
Judgment
11:00 News…

9. WHAT WOULD BE BETTER? Doing = learning. Doing builds resilience!
Life skills
Relationship skills
Problem-solving!
Look for chances to take one step back.

10. RESILIENCE “I’ll be interested to see what you do!” Mistakes Praise
Life lessons
Choices
Risk-taking
Resources!
“I’ll be interested to see what you do!”

11. WHAT ADULTS NEED TO REMEMBER
Adult involvement supports
Safety
Growth
Learning
Adult involvement harms
Confidence
Competence
Relationships

12. Resilience requires trust.
FINDING RESILIENCE
Resilience requires trust.

13. Empathy
without intervention.

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