1. Revising your Final Essay

2. Common Issues Essay organization Using and integrating sources
Citing sources
Style and tone

3. Essay Organization
Topic sentences, topic sentences, topic sentences! They…
Ensure that each paragraph has a purpose
Help keep paragraphs focused
Let readers clearly know what you’re trying to say
Include transitions to create flow
Make sure each paragraph contains a quote or example
Make sure thesis is clear and that all paragraphs are related to it

4. Using and integrating sources
Use sources to:
Provide a picture of the debate surrounding your issue
Represent the counterargument (you can disagree with them!)
Provide data, statistics, or specific examples that support your points

5. Using and integrating sources (cont’d)
Remember the “sandwich” method!
Introduce and then analyze/comment on your quotes and examples.
Quotes and examples should flow smoothly into your own writing.
Remember to cite!!!

6. Using and integrating sources (cont’d)
Example of a well-integrated quote from a source:
Robert Reich is an American political economist, professor, author, and political commentator. In public post that he personally uploaded he wrote a statement expressing how “millions of young people head to college and universities”. He also stated that “they assume that a degree is the only gateway to the American middle class” and that “[t]oo often in modern America, we equate ‘equal opportunity’ with an opportunity to get a four-year liberal arts degree. It should mean an opportunity to learn what’s necessary to get a good job.” In my opinion I do not agree with his statement. You cannot put a price to education; if your dedication does not match learning then you must not know what you want. If you think that education is all about the money then you are wrong. For example when you become a teacher or a nurse you reach toward that field because you are passionate about your career and helping others.
Note: this example is from a student paper and does have some style and tone errors, and some grammar errors, that need to be fixed. I only wanted to point out the way the quote is integrated. The writer gives us plenty of context to understand the quotes, and blends them smoothly in with her own writing. She also follows the quotes with plenty of analysis, explaining why she disagrees with Reich’s argument.

7. Citing Sources
Cite to indicate to readers that you have done your research (ethos!) and to avoid plagiarism
All in-text citations connect readers to the list in your Works Cited page
Readers need to know author (or title, if there is no author) and page number (if applicable)
When in doubt, cite it!

8. Citation Examples Works Cited citation: In-text citation:
Reich, Robert. "College Is a Ludicrous Waste of Money." Salon.com. Salon Media, 3 Sept Web. 26 May 2015.
In-text citation:
Robert Reich is an American political economist, professor, author, and political commentator. In public post that he personally uploaded he wrote a statement expressing himself of how “millions of young people head to college and universities.”
Many people believe that “a degree is the only gateway to the American middle class” (Reich).

9. Tone and Style #1 most common issue: “you”
Use only if directly and intentionally addressing the reader
Do not use it in a general sense
Ex: If you get a four-year degree, you are more likely to get a good job.
Instead, use more accurate and general terms:
Ex: Students who earn a four-year degree are more likely to get a good job.

10. Tone and Style
Also avoid: “I” unless using a specific personal example
Ex: I believe that college should cost less.
Using “I” lends writing a weaker tone because it makes you sound unsure
Be more declarative
Ex: College should cost less.

11. Where to go from here: Here is what I recommend:
1) Take care of big picture items first.
Find all five of your sources
Figure out what your thesis is
2) Print out your draft and…
Do a reverse outline
A rough outline of your essay as it is
Look for:
Paragraphs without a topic or with more than one topic
An organization that makes sense (problems before solutions, causes before effects, etc)
Missing sections or information (i.e. background info, counterargument)
Make sure each paragraph relates to the thesis
3) Add more material – make sure you use all of your sources and that you reach the minimum page count.
4) Read it out loud to yourself!!! You will catch so many little errors this way, I promise.
5) Circle your “you”s and “I”s, and get rid of them unless they are appropriate.