1. Boundaries

2. Why talk about Boundaries? What good are they anyways? Well, boundaries . . .

3. Enhance Your Life

4. Define Who You Are – Your Identity

5. Bring Order – Regulate your Life

6. Promote You

7. Protect Yourself from the Control of Others

8. Preserve Your Purpose & Mission

9. Protect you Finest Personal Assets

10. Satisfy Your Need for Self-Confirmation

11. Boundaries are good if you . . .
Want to enhance your life.
Want to protect yourself.
Want to make sure others know this is your own life.
Want to make good choices.
Want to go after the true expression of who you are by the way you live, love, give, and relate to others.

12. Hakeem Olajuwon
“All these boundaries—Africa, Asia, Malaysia, America – are set by men. But you don’t have to look at boundaries when you are looking at a man –at the character of a man. The Question is: What do you stand for? Are you a follower? Or are you a leader?”

13. Not having good boundaries can result in . . .

14. Loss of Respect

15. Loss of Control

16. Increased Chaos

17. Loss of Interest in Life

18. Unmet Goals

19. Types of Boundaries Physical Boundaries Intellectual Boundaries
Emotional Boundaries
Material Boundaries
Time boundaries

20. Physical Boundaries

21. Intellectual Boundaries

22. Emotional Boundaries

24. Material Boundaries Can I borrow / have. . . Your pencil? Your jacket?
A ride?
Your bike?
Your car?
Your house?
Different rule for different people.
Do people help themselves without asking?
Get food for themselves without asking?
Eat the last cookie?

25. Time Boundaries
Does s/he think you should spend ALL your free time with them?
Do they respect your desire to hand out with others?
Does s/he assume you’re always ok with doing things together?
Do they respect your need for alone time?
Do they respect that you need time for family, studying, sleep, and other activities?
Do they contact you any time of the day or night?
Do they respect your schedule and be sure not to call or text too early or too late or during your regular dinner or family time?
Do they get upset if you don’t text back right away?

26. Assignment
Imagine you’re holding a party in your honor 10, 20, 30 years in the future. You invite four people to speak:
1 from your family
1 of your friends
1 from your job or school
1 from the masjid or religious organization
What would you like each of these speakers to say about you and your life?
What kind of husband/wife, father/mother, son/daughter, cousin, sister/brother would they say you are?
What kind of friend are you?
What kind of co-worker or student?

27. What character traits would you like them to have seen in you?
What contributions and achievements have you made that you would want them to remember?
What difference do you want to have made in people‘s lives?